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The Malinga Shuffle and the Rashid Problem
A Kenyan exponent produces a decent rendition of cricket's most fashionable dance step
© AFP
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Saturday, 9th April This year the IPL and the County Championship began on the same day. It makes for a startling contrast. Flicking between the two is like travelling in time: from cricket 21st-century style to the late Victorian era and back again. In entertainment terms it’s like choosing between a frenetic weekend trip to a packed out theme park and a wander around your local door-handle museum on a wet Tuesday afternoon.
And internet forums are full of people prepared to argue to a standstill to prove one or the other is best. These days you can’t be a cricket pluralist; you’re either an empty-headed, face-painted Twenty20 fan with the attention span of a goldfish, or you’re a sad old fuddy duddy at war with the modern world, hankering after a colonial past in which the sun never set on the dullest way of playing mankind’s greatest sport.
But why must we choose? Why deny ourselves one or the other? Let’s cherish cricket in all its forms. Personally, at the moment the county version doesn’t really float my boat. But if fate allows, post-retirement I intend to spend many long afternoons quietly snoozing in the shires. The County Championship is like Parliament, the Law Courts and open-heart surgery. I don’t really want to watch it, but I’m glad it’s there.
Sunday, 10th April Pune have more players than anyone else. This is clearly unfair, but it does bring with it a particular problem. When Yuvraj sits down to pick his XI, he must feel like a schoolboy given the keys to a sweet shop. The temptation to try everything must be overwhelming. Where do you start? Picking an IPL team must be like trying to complete a crossword puzzle in which there are 27 answers to each clue.
Pune won today and so did Malinga. He caused more bruised toes than a short-sighted hippopotamus learning to tango. There’s even a dance named after him. It’s called the Malinga Shuffle and it’s easy to learn. Shift your weight to your right. Crouch in anticipation. Stare helplessly into the middle distance as though trying to spot a pouncing snow leopard in a blizzard. Then double up, hop backwards and try to hit yourself on the foot with your own bat. Falling over is optional.
Monday, 11th April Today something interesting happened at New Road. No, not the fact that Worcestershire’s latest brief visit to the First Division began with a nine-wicket loss in three days. It was the fact that Adil Rashid took an awful lot of wickets. This is rather inconvenient. If he carries on like this, things might get rather uncomfortable for those on the England selection committee currently suffering from Rashidophobia. When we need a second spinner against Sri Lanka, could it be that they will be left with no choice but to pick the talented youngster? Or will they give John Emburey a call?
Andrew Hughes is a writer currently based in England
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ABOUT THE AUTHOR
Andrew Hughes
Andrew Hughes is a writer and avid cricket watcher who has always retained a healthy suspicion of professional sportsmen, and like any right-thinking person rates Neville Cardus more highly than Don Bradman. Providing his ransom demands continue to be met, he has promised never to write a whimsical book about village cricket. @hughandrews73
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Mankind's greatest sport indeed ! Truth be told -- I don't really care who is playing and what form it is, as long as there is cricket on the telly I will watch it. If there is a game in the local cricket ground I will watch it, if there is a Test match in the city I will watch it, if there is a Test match within driving distance i will watch. In short I will watch all cricket.
Posted by Blesson on (April 14, 2011, 13:26 GMT)Ahm... I would have to blame it all on no one else, but you... You have caused this sort of addiction in me... of reading your blog every time I log on to my computer in office... Hope it doesn't get me fired for laughin out loud.. LOL... This one... again a masterpiece.. to quote a few words for posterity: "It’s called the Malinga Shuffle and it’s easy to learn. Shift your weight to your right. Crouch in anticipation. Stare helplessly into the middle distance as though trying to spot a pouncing snow leopard in a blizzard. Then double up, hop backwards and try to hit yourself on the foot with your own bat. Falling over is optional.:
That was an yorker all right... hilarious
Posted by Sabir Ayub Rabbani on (April 14, 2011, 8:26 GMT)I really liked the last sentence..."could it be that they will be left with no choice but to pick the talented youngster? Or will they give John Emburey a call?" Really funny.
Posted by Lenny on (April 14, 2011, 6:14 GMT)very nice article, it has everything in it
Posted by M.Ashraff on (April 13, 2011, 10:24 GMT)Rashid is england's future, he needs encouragement and coaching to be a world beating spinner in future. He should be included in England team ASP.
Posted by hassan on (April 13, 2011, 9:06 GMT)i think yuvraj is good enough to pick up his team,he is a bold guy and most of the time his decision r rite...it does not matters how big the squad is!
Posted by Mark on (April 13, 2011, 9:03 GMT)Startling news for those who think that County cricket is dead: attendances are rising steadily; radio audiences for ball-by-ball commentary provided by Local Radio are enthusiastic. The first day of the County Championship attracted crowds at some of the grounds that some lower division football teams in England would envy. First Class cricket does tend to be played in front of one man and his dog in many countries, but not so now in England.
Oh, and yes. Adil Rashid has to play soon. Probably this summer.
Posted by Venky on (April 13, 2011, 8:14 GMT)This IPL is all too confusing.. yuvi playing for pune.. Ishant/Gambhir not playing for delhi.. doesnt make sense.. If the IPL teams are formed with local city flavour. They should have an option of retaining Ranji players who play for that particular state.. Sadly besides mumbai and chennai.. all other teams seem pretty "foreign"..
Posted by Stephen Wilson on (April 13, 2011, 8:05 GMT)I watched Rashid take most of his wickets at Worcestershire and it really was great to see a young, ENGLISH leg-spinner bowl well. He used flight to tempt his victims and got a few with the googly. He definitely deserves a try in the Test format as ODI cricket has never been suited to a leggy (unless it's Warne!). I then went home and watched the IPL I'd had on record!
Posted by Thileepan on (April 13, 2011, 7:23 GMT)Its true we cherish all forms of cricket. Malinga proved not only fantastic batting is the fan's favourite, but also a good bowling display also enjoyable.