England tour of New Zealand, 2007/08 / Commentary

England in New Zealand Test Series - 2nd Test

New Zealand v England

England won by 126 runs

Overs 1-50  | Overs 51-100  | Overs 101-150

100.1

Mills to Sidebottom, no run, cor, he's lined that up nicely. A confident smack to mid-on

100.2

Mills to Sidebottom, 4 leg byes, good cricket from Sidebottom, pouncing on this leg-side waste from the tiring Mills and nudging it down to fine leg

100.3

Mills to Sidebottom, 2 runs, quality shot from England's No.9. A quickish bouncer which pings off the surface and Sidebottom takes his eye off it but pulls it in front of square

100.4

Mills to Sidebottom, no run, yikes, that's zinged through! McCullum takes it above his head

100.5

Mills to Sidebottom, no run, bouncer. Ignored

100.6

Mills to Sidebottom, no run, and it's left alone to end the over

End of over 101 (6 runs) England 318/7
RJ Sidebottom    6* (17b)      KD Mills    30-4-86-2
PD Collingwood    59* (143b 7x4)      JDP Oram    27-11-39-3

Right, come on England. Time to throw the welly at it

101.1

Oram to Collingwood, 1 run, forcefully smudged to midwicket for a hastily scampered single

Around the wicket

101.2

Oram to Sidebottom, no run, Sidebottom drags his bat inside the line

"I suspect the groundsmen are on their haunches as they can see the dark clouds building to the south..." says David, ominously.

101.3

Oram to Sidebottom, 1 run, neatly driven square past gully for two

"Don't blame the thigh pads," says Mark Yeoman. "The proper obstacle for a ball that's directed at the stumps is the bat."

101.4

Oram to Collingwood, no run, fine ball which squares Collingwood up who defends with both feet pointing down the pitch

101.5

Oram to Collingwood, FOUR, a four! That's woken up the crowd. Short of a length, Collingwood rocks onto the back foot and pulls it over midwicket

"Martin Crowe has long been known to make such weird remarks in his commentary," says Jeremy Snook. "During the highlight reel of McCullum's many sixes in one of the ODIs, these were his actual words: 'whack-a-dee-doo-dah! Three holy cows and a blue blazes!' Truly special." Very.

101.6

Oram to Collingwood, no run, punched back to Oram who hurls it into the pitch, causing Collingwood to dive for evasive cover. He is not a happy chap

End of over 102 (6 runs) England 324/7
PD Collingwood    64* (147b 8x4)      JDP Oram    28-11-45-3
RJ Sidebottom    7* (19b)      KD Mills    30-4-86-2

Here's Mark Gillespie. And here's Nick Woolley: "Another little titbit of info about Mark Gillespie, his uncle played for Liverpool, Gary Gillespie."

102.1

Gillespie to Sidebottom, FOUR, pulled for four! That's a heck of a stroke from the No.9. It was only fractionally short of a length, it just sat up nicely for Sidebottom who pulls it through the leg side

102.2

Gillespie to Sidebottom, no run, he plays and misses, lunging forward and prodding at it

102.3

Gillespie to Sidebottom, 2 runs, squeezed through the covers

102.4

Gillespie to Sidebottom, no run, a tentative poke outside off. No feet movement and a better length from Gillespie

102.5

Gillespie to Sidebottom, no run, short of a length and left alone. That's rubbish

102.6

Gillespie to Sidebottom, no run, driven and dropped Sidebottom drove on the up, the ball looping (rather quickly) to mid-on where Chris Martin rather dozily lunges forward but can't cling on. That was a bit village from Martin I'm afraid to say. New Zealand are beginning to throw their toys out of the pram

End of over 103 (6 runs) England 330/7
RJ Sidebottom    13* (25b 1x4)      MR Gillespie    18-1-76-1
PD Collingwood    64* (147b 8x4)      JDP Oram    28-11-45-3

103.1

Oram to Collingwood, 1 run, turned around the corner

103.2

Oram to Sidebottom, no run, nudged to leg

They're shining that ball like nobody's business. Oram's now going around the wicket to Sidebottom

103.3

Oram to Sidebottom, 4 leg byes, an utter waste down the leg side. Sidebottom only needs get a thin nick on it and it races down the vacant fine leg boundary

103.4

Oram to Sidebottom, no run, a teaser outside off. Sidebottom prods and misses

103.5

Oram to Sidebottom, no run, that was seriously quick off the pitch and beats Sidebottom for pace. McCullum takes it chest-hight

Oram's just slipping himself here. He's going over the wicket again

103.6

Oram to Sidebottom, no run, and it's left alone outside off

Marcus Berkmann (of Rain Men fame) writes: "For many years I believed that the phrase 'sick as a parrot' was invented by Miles Kington when he wrote most of a column called 'The Seventies' in Punch in, well, the seventies. Certainly no one seemed to have used it before: it appeared to be a new coining. Anyway, a couple of years ago at a party, I asked him about this, and he said, no, he'd had nothing to do with it, it must have been someone else. Hope that's some help." It certainly isn't, and we're very grateful Marcus.

Good first hour for England, that. Karl: "Three holy cows and a blue blazes!" Commentary gold, Martin, but surely plagiarised from Hugh Laurie's Prince of Wales in Blackadder the Third ..."

End of over 104 (5 runs) England 335/7
RJ Sidebottom    13* (30b 1x4)      JDP Oram    29-11-46-3
PD Collingwood    65* (148b 8x4)      MR Gillespie    18-1-76-1

104.1

Gillespie to Collingwood, OUT, gone! Full, swinging into Collingwood who's trapped in front

PD Collingwood lbw b Gillespie 65 (236m 149b 8x4 0x6) SR: 43.62

Around the wicket to the left-handed hero

104.2

Gillespie to Panesar, no run, angling into Monty who nudges

104.3

Gillespie to Panesar, no run, a languid drive which nearly beats cover, but there was about as much power in the stroke as an asthmatic flee

Back over the wicket

104.4

Gillespie to Panesar, no run, short of a length and Monty says "urghh" or possibly "awwww" to one which bounces past his nose

Back round the wicket. He's all over the shop here

104.5

Gillespie to Panesar, no run, wide of the off stump and ignored

"Monty promoted to No. 10?" exclaims an incredulous Scott. "Three holy cows and blue blazes!!!!" Get out, now.

104.6

Gillespie to Panesar, no run, very firmly blocked on the back foot by Monty

End of over 105 (wicket maiden) England 335/8
MS Panesar    0* (5b)      MR Gillespie    19-2-76-2
RJ Sidebottom    13* (30b 1x4)      JDP Oram    29-11-46-3

Chris Martin into the attack for the first time and is around the wicket

105.1

Martin to Sidebottom, 1 run, nudged to leg, they scamper through. Monty wasn't quite awake but nevertheless they steal a single

105.2

Martin to Panesar, no run, defended off the back foot

"Any truth to the rumour that Sidebottom is actually the brother of 'Wolf' from UK Gladiators?" Matt Gibb wants to know. Make up your own minds. They share the same facial expression, this is Wolf snarling before coming into bowl.

105.3

Martin to Panesar, 3 runs, flicked with lazy elegance and a touch of class through midwicket. "Yup" is the nonchalant call from Monty, as though it was his bread-and-butter if not his toast-and-marmite

Oh, toast and marmite. That is exactly what I could do with right now

105.4

Martin to Sidebottom, no run, beaten outside off

105.5

Martin to Sidebottom, no run, prods and misses outside off. Again

Oh come on. I've had enough of all this pokery

105.6

Martin to Sidebottom, no run, again he pokes and misses to a fine ball outside off

End of over 106 (4 runs) England 339/8
RJ Sidebottom    14* (34b 1x4)      CS Martin    20-1-80-1
MS Panesar    3* (7b)      MR Gillespie    19-2-76-2

106.1

Gillespie to Panesar, no run, punched off the back foot

106.2

Gillespie to Panesar, 3 runs, shot, Panesar. A firm-footed drive through the off side which receives hearty cheers from a good sized crowd. Much too full and Monty was comfortable on the front foot

Chris Dubuis: "Pretty sure that "three holy cows and blue blazes" was never a line from Blackadder the Third. Actually i'm almost 100% certain. I have the scripts at home, so I can check." How do you know Karl wasn't joking?

106.3

Gillespie to Sidebottom, no run, defended off the back foot

106.4

Gillespie to Sidebottom, no run, prods forward

106.5

Gillespie to Sidebottom, OUT, short of a length, Sidebottom top-edges a pull and Bell takes a fine tumbling catch at mid-on

RJ Sidebottom c Bell b Gillespie 14 (44m 37b 1x4 0x6) SR: 37.83

So, the end is nigh here. Phil Daly: "What's going on with the English profile pics on Cricinfo? Monty's has some of the best backlighting I've ever seen, and KP's makes him look like a bit like a Backstreet Boy." At which point Jenny starts singing, badly, "Backstreet's back, all right!" Thanks, Phil. All those losers should not be allowed to make music

106.6

Gillespie to Panesar, OUT, gone! Down the leg side, it rises on Monty who fends it off his chest through to McCullum

MS Panesar c †McCullum b Gillespie 6 (14m 10b 0x4 0x6) SR: 60.00

A great effort from England, recovering from their collapse yesterday. The man to watch is Jacob Oram who, in spite of his good figures, looks a trifle peeved that England have been "allowed" so many. Join us in, well, a few minutes after the groundsman has rolled his roller all over the place. I'm handing over to Jenny now, if I can only stop her screaming her excitement and cartwheeling around the place like a Catherine wheel. Ta'ta for now.

Thanks, Will und guten morgen alles. (Sorry, that sounds Partridge-esque). Vettori has asked for the light roller in between innings as his side prepare to reply to England's 342.

End of over 107 (3 runs) England 342/10
     MR Gillespie    20-2-79-4
JM Anderson    0* (0b)      CS Martin    20-1-80-1
Overs 1-50  | Overs 51-100  | Overs 101-150
Series Results
New Zealand v England at Napier - Mar 22-26, 2008
England won by 121 runs
New Zealand v England at Wellington - Mar 13-17, 2008
England won by 126 runs
New Zealand v England at Hamilton - Mar 5-9, 2008
New Zealand won by 189 runs
More results »

Photos

Mar 17, 2008

Stuart Broad bowls with the RA Vance Stand in the backdrop, New Zealand v England, 2nd Test, Wellington, 5th day, March 17, 2008

Stuart Broad bowls with the RA Vance Stand in the backdrop

© Getty Images

Mar 17, 2008

James Anderson took seven in the match, New Zealand v England, 2nd Test, 5th day, Wellington, March 17, 2008

James Anderson took seven in the match

© Getty Images

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