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Tests of Character
Discover yourself by taking our quizzes
Are you a fierce fast bowler?
Do batsmen wet their pants when you say Howdy to them?
What do you think when you see a batsman ready to face you across the pitch?
With an outfit like that, he's no competition for me
This planet belongs to me. You shall now be my slave
You're a waste of space
You won't hit me for a six this time
How do you feel about the use of helmets and other protective gear?
Like I'm playing cricket with a bunch of toddlers
Makes me look menacing
Nothing can protect them from my arc of death
It covers up your natural beauty
How do you feel about the one-bouncer-per-over rule?
Any more and I'd have to retire hurt
Can't have enough bodyguarding
Rules! It's all these rules trying to stymie my genius that made me what I am today
One bouncer from me is equal to a hundred weapons of mass destruction, so it doesn't bother me
What is your response to a six hit over your head?
"Ha ha, you missed!"
To aim for decapitation with the next ball
"Thank god, it didn't hit my face!"
How will a batsman react to your yorker?
By hoping to score better on personality
By driving it
By requesting an X-ray
There'll be nothing but bits of endoplasm remaining
Will he point his bat at you after scoring a boundary?
Wouldn't matter if he did because it can't penetrate my invisible force shield
Only if he's asking me to take over the batting, because he'll be too frightened about what'll come next
To thank me? That would be embarrassing
Flirting will get him nowhere
Do you sledge the opposition?
Of course. Without catchphrases, I would be hard to recognise
Don't need to. Any more terrified and they'd be incapable of coordinated movements
Don't need to give them any more ammo, do I?
Sure, a little sniping and bitching is all part of the fun
What is your opinion of Bodyline bowling?
The foundation of the contest is the line of the body
It was the last time cricket was truly a bowler's game
Not much, but I would have loved to have taken D Jardine under my wing and groomed to become the most formidable anti-hero ever
Pretty cool, but I think I better stick to swing bowling
What will be your nickname?
More in Page 2
Smith and Guptill light up Sydney
Two memorable centuries, including the highest individual score at the ground, plenty of boundaries and a decent atmosphere at the SCG's first international of the home summer
The Dubai sauna gives a suffocating welcome
The heat and the one-sided encounter were downers but this Pakistan was happy that at least his team won
A triumphant Lord's return
Pakistan thrilled one and all in their first Test at Lord's since 2010, giving their fans the experience of a lifetime
A match that transcended the ordinary
A fan hears "the sound that will live on in my memory for the rest of my life" during the India-Bangladesh game
An 800-km train journey to watch two special wins
A long journey, queues and ticketing troubles could not take away from the great show that Afghanistan and Scotland put on in Nagpur
NZ opt to bowl; Southee in for Ferguson
Duckett misses out; Morgan, Hales return
Zimbabwe announce bumper domestic season
Debutant Mufti runs Lions close
Khawaja's ton dominates Western Australia
Pakistan's Hamilton crash, and ageing Misbah's runs
also reveals the highest Test total that could not forestall defeat
'I didn't see a pathway for me in the game'
talks about his decision to quit Scotland cricket at 29, and the haves and have-nots of Associate cricket
Keaton Jennings emerges from his father's mould
The newest member of the England squad takes after his father, Ray Jennings, a man he got used to calling coach, not dad, early. By
Ambiguity in death
The Cricket Monthly December issue
Cricket needs more specialist coaches
The players are specialising more than ever. Why aren't the coaches? By
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