The Heavy Ball

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The week on Twitter

'I didn't pick up the courage to spoon him, though'

Nearly lurid revelations float our boat in this week's Twitter round-up

Alex Bowden

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Steven Finn talks to the media, The Oval, August 30, 2012
Preserved his honour for four hours in a bed with Graeme Swann © Getty Images

The pastime
Ravi Bopara didn't get much cricket during the World Twenty20. Still, at least he was in one of the most beautiful, idyllic places on earth.

"Whole day of fifa I reckon. Nothing else to do in Kandy"

And after England were knocked out, did he experience a moment of clarity that caused him to reappraise things, perhaps leading him to feel a little differently?

Of course he did.

"Just tried out the new fifa13. Loving it. Can't just cross & header at will on this one @finnysteve"

It's amazing just how much things can change in a short space of time.

The ducks
Marcus North had a bad day at the office.

"Always nice to come home to the smiles on my kids faces after a s**t day Told the youngster I got a pair today,he asked "could I have some""

The most striking thing about this incident is that the child likes pears. What child likes pears?

The rock star lifestyle
Steve Smith's a young man about town.

"Just strolled down to see the under 17s and 19s lawn bowls trials. This @zamps73 has a bright future. Also well done to @DanielRootes29 @ni"

Rumours that Smith was pleased to have been omitted from Australia's squad because the World Twenty20 clashed with a local domino competition are probably unfounded. But might not be.

The direct route
After being knocked out of the World Twenty20, Ross Taylor can console himself with the fact that he'll soon be home.


Dubai isn't remotely in the right direction. When does the Champions League start? Maybe he should just sit tight for a few days and then get a different flight.

The shared bed
Graeme Swann and the rest of the England team were also waiting for a flight.

"A four hour wait in an airport hotel, lying on a bed with finny. I didn't pluck up the courage to spoon him though."

Finn was perplexed by this.

"@Swannyg66 is that coz you were inconveniently aroused and didn't want to alarm me?"

Swann didn't answer. Make of that what you will.

The analysis
Bishan Bedi refuses to analyse.

"Ind urgency too little too late-T20 not something to lose sleep-no room fr analysis-still Indns could've fielded more competent combinations"

Which combinations and why?

Tino Best's modesty corner
"Ye twitter my training video is on youtube..see how Tino"the Animal"Best work out so go youtube and put in Tino Best Gym Session...Thanks"

It's a good video. At one point, the footage of our Tino pumping iron freezes and the phrase "This is cake!" appears on screen.

Nando's Watch
It was quiet on the Nando's front last week. Essex's Tymal Mills explains why that might have been.

"My first nandos in a month, cricket season must be over"

Nonsense. Cricket is a year-round job these days. Ask Ryan Sidebottom.

"After Training an Nandos wi the Boys ... Now settling down to watch @leedsrhinos v Wigan in playoff #superleague #greatgame"

And Surrey's Jason Roy.

"Costa, gym and maybe a nandos to start the week off...#busytimes"

RSS FeedAlex Bowden blogs at King Cricket

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