England tour of West Indies, 3rd ODI: West Indies v England at Bridgetown, Mar 27, 2009
West Indies won by 8 wickets (with 176 balls remaining) (D/L method)
27 March 2009 (50-over match)

Andy Zaltzman has filed his latest piece on The Unpredictable XI (part 1). Read it now. Meanwhile, players are making their way out onto the pitch and it'll be Edwards to open the bowling

10.50am 45-over match and it'll get underway at 11am. Or 3pm for the poor UK workforce in their dreary offices up and down Great Britain.

10.39am No news is supposed to be good news. But on this occasion it is merely no news. Ho hum. Put the kettle back on.

10.18am Excitement! We might be playing a game of cricket in 30 minutes. Not us, obviously - we can't play, hence we write about it instead - but West Indies and England. This is clearly nothing more than a hopeful timeframe, but we're trying to keep you occupied and on tenterhooks. Great word, that, tenterhooks.

10.12am Drama out in the middle - two-dozen people are trying to drag off the sodden covers. Still no start-time. In the meantime, why not donate some of your hard-earned money to Adam Williams, ESPN's audio and visual monkey who's running an entire marathon. Go on. It's for a good cause and all.

10.05am The news is that we have no news, but we hope to have new news for you soon.

9.45am The heavens have opened and the scene is utterly Brummy. This is Birmingham, not Bridgetown - the clouds grey, the rain wet. You know the story. It's stop-start but it's been pre-tty, pre-tty, pre-tty heavy as Larry David might say. "If I was Steve Harmison," says David Gower, "I'd be seeking counselling any time about now." We assume he's talking about Harmison's axing for this game but as yet can't confirm it.

9.30am Drat and damn and other similar words: the start's been delayed. It's going to be one of those mornings I'm afraid, chaps. It's beginning to tip it down out there. It seems inconceivable that we won't see the return of our favourite friends Duckworth and Lewis at some point.

9.15am There's been a bit of rain about and the covers were on. But, lo, they are being removed so we could even start on time. Get in there.

9.00am Morning, all. An unchanged West Indies have won the toss and chosen to bowl. Well done to them. "The challenge is to go 2-1 up in the series," flat-bats Strauss who apparently has no concerns batting first. There's a bit of rain about, by the way - it's more Birmingham than Bridgetown today. Flintoff returns which is "very exciting," Strauss reckons. And we agree with him. He returns at the expense of his old chum Steve Harmison. Anyway. We have about 24.5 minutes until the start - I'm Will Luke and will be joined by the surprisingly sprightly Andrew Miller shortly.

0.1

Edwards to Strauss, no run, good pace, and a good leave on the off stump - bending back into him. Good start all round

0.2

Edwards to Strauss, no run, touch wider this time and again Strauss isn't bothered about it

0.2

Edwards to Strauss, no run, two deliveries in, and Matt Prior concedes his first byes of the innings. A bit unlucky, to be fair. Steepling bounce from a short ball, and no way to cut that off

0.3

Edwards to Strauss, no run, down the leg side - not a wide, though. A touch fortuitously methinketh

0.4

Edwards to Strauss, no run, left alone outside off

0.5

Edwards to Strauss, no run, pace, bounce and a flaying shot by Strauss trying to uppercut it over the slips but he misses

0.6

Edwards to Strauss, no run, pushed out on the front foot but he can't bissect the field. A good maiden

End of over 1 (maiden) England 0/0 (RR: 0.00)

    • AJ Strauss 0 (6b)
    • RS Bopara 0 (0b)
    • FH Edwards 1-1-0-0
1.1

Baker to Bopara, no run, outside off and a touch of movement away from Bopara's fishy little defensive

1.2

Baker to Bopara, FOUR, actual and literal runs, as those from West London say, as Bopara comes forward and it takes a thick outside edge past the slips

1.3

Baker to Bopara, no run, a touch of swing away from the right hander who leaves alone

1.4

Baker to Bopara, no run, punched off the back foot to point

1.5

Baker to Bopara, no run, wide of the off stump and left alone

1.6

Baker to Bopara, 1 wide, well wide and left alone. In fact, that's called a wide - rightly so

1.6

Baker to Bopara, no run, excellent line and length and Bopara is forced into a defensive on the back foot

End of over 2 (5 runs) England 5/0 (RR: 2.50)

    • RS Bopara 4 (6b 1x4)
    • AJ Strauss 0 (6b)
    • LS Baker 1-0-5-0
    • FH Edwards 1-1-0-0
2.1

Edwards to Strauss, 1 run, on his legs, nudged to leg

2.2

Edwards to Bopara, 4 byes, a quick, sharp bouncer - that was slick! But it's flying over the batsman and the keeper

2.3

Edwards to Bopara, no run, ouch! Bopara has completely misread that, ducking into a good-length delivery and it smashes into his shoulder. He's worn one there.

I bet Tendulkar wouldn't have played it like that, Ravi...!

2.4

Edwards to Bopara, no run, fuller length here - Edwards really has his tail up

2.5

Edwards to Bopara, no run, shuffles back and across, defending it with a straight bat

2.6

Edwards to Bopara, no run, a very firm and impressively orthodox forward defence

End of over 3 (5 runs) England 10/0 (RR: 3.33)

    • RS Bopara 4 (11b 1x4)
    • AJ Strauss 1 (7b)
    • FH Edwards 2-1-1-0
    • LS Baker 1-0-5-0

Baker to Strauss. Two slips

3.1

Baker to Strauss, no run, left alone outside off. Too wide, that

3.2

Baker to Strauss, no run, crisply clipped to point

3.3

Baker to Strauss, no run, nicely driven but straight to mid-off. Timed that well

3.4

Baker to Strauss, no run, punched off the back foot this time, again to mid-off

3.5

Baker to Strauss, no run, more nice timing from Strauss but this time his leg-side clip picks out midwicket

England really must assert themselves. Take a leaf out of the women's World Cup-winning book

3.6

Baker to Strauss, no run, punched to cover - and another maiden for West Indies. Excellent start by them. Good, disciplined lines and their fielders are alive

End of over 4 (maiden) England 10/0 (RR: 2.50)

    • AJ Strauss 1 (13b)
    • RS Bopara 4 (11b 1x4)
    • LS Baker 2-1-5-0
    • FH Edwards 2-1-1-0
4.1

Edwards to Bopara, no run, defended on the front foot

4.2

Edwards to Bopara, 3 runs, a calm nudged through midwicket - really sweetly played, flicking his wrists and picking up three

4.3

Edwards to Strauss, no run, Strauss is back in line and defending out to the off side

4.4

Edwards to Strauss, 1 run, the wrong line from Edwards. On Strauss's pads, it's whipped down to fine leg

Andy Zaltzman has filed his latest piece on The Unpredictable XI (part 1). Read it now.

4.5

Edwards to Bopara, 1 run, Bopara stands tall and guides it out to cover

4.6

Edwards to Strauss, no run, excellent line and Strauss defends it confidently. I know that sounds like a contradiction in terms, but it is actually possible. A crisp, backward defence where the ball shoots off the bat but straight to the fielder

End of over 5 (5 runs) England 15/0 (RR: 3.00)

    • AJ Strauss 2 (16b)
    • RS Bopara 8 (14b 1x4)
    • FH Edwards 3-1-6-0
    • LS Baker 2-1-5-0
5.1

Baker to Bopara, no run, wide of the off stump - he's lucky to get away with that

5.2

Baker to Bopara, no run, hops back, pushes it off the back foot

5.3

Baker to Bopara, no run, reasonable line outside off, and there's prodigious bounce for Baker here too. Bopara ignores it

5.4

Baker to Bopara, no run, sways out of the way of a quick ball at 87.8mph

5.5

Baker to Bopara, no run, punched to cover

5.6

Baker to Bopara, no run, short of a length and he tries to work it out to the off side but gets a thick inside edge

End of over 6 (maiden) England 15/0 (RR: 2.50)

    • RS Bopara 8 (20b 1x4)
    • AJ Strauss 2 (16b)
    • LS Baker 3-2-5-0
    • FH Edwards 3-1-6-0

Another storming start by England as they concede another maiden. Three out of six.

6.1

Edwards to Strauss, no run, whipped off his hip down to fine leg

6.2

Edwards to Strauss, OUT, got him! That's a superb take from Gayle. Strauss went for a hook but it was too quick and he skied it over the slips. But Gayle, running back 10 or 11 paces, took a fine catch over his head

AJ Strauss c Gayle b Edwards 2 (25m 18b 0x4 0x6) SR: 11.11

Julian, a feedbacker, has asked me to wash my mouth out for using the a word (asserting). I'm sorry.

6.3

Edwards to Bopara, 2 runs, Bopara's timed that beautifully but straight back into the bowler's boot, where it ricochets out to cover

6.4

Edwards to Bopara, OUT, that is awful from Bopara. Excellent bowling, mind - nice, quick and aggressive and Bopara tried to hook it but it got big on him. The ball made its limp, feeble way straight to mid-on

RS Bopara c Sarwan b Edwards 10 (27m 22b 1x4 0x6) SR: 45.45

Not a good choice of shot I'm afraid. England have been tied down but both attacking shots that they've attempted have cost them wickets. It's thoughtless, panicky cricket

6.5

Edwards to Shah, no run, back in his crease, nudged to leg

6.6

Edwards to Shah, no run, that is quick! I'm here to tell you - seriously sharp. Wide enough for Shah to leave it alone, but an 89mph bouncer is never much fun

End of over 7 (2 runs) England 17/2 (RR: 2.42)

    • OA Shah 0 (2b)
    • KP Pietersen 0 (0b)
    • FH Edwards 4-1-8-2
    • LS Baker 3-2-5-0

Here's the tired Kevin Pietersen

7.1

Baker to Pietersen, no run, guided out to the off side

7.2

Baker to Pietersen, no run, good line and length and it's defended

7.3

Baker to Pietersen, no run, Pietersen shuffles across and, with his head right over the ball, defends

7.4

Baker to Pietersen, no run, again skips to leg and tries to flick it through midwicket, but can't

7.5

Baker to Pietersen, no run, dropped to leg

7.6

Baker to Pietersen, no run, short of a length, Pietersen goes for a pull but is beaten for pace

End of over 8 (maiden) England 17/2 (RR: 2.12)

    • KP Pietersen 0 (6b)
    • OA Shah 0 (2b)
    • LS Baker 4-3-5-0
    • FH Edwards 4-1-8-2
8.1

Edwards to Shah, no run, timed off the back foot to short cover

8.2

Edwards to Shah, no run, comes forward and forces it, with plenty of urgent bottom hand, but straight to mid-off

8.3

Edwards to Shah, no run, a slingly, flattish delivery outside off and Shah follows it exposing all three of his stumps. Dangerous tactic

8.4

Edwards to Shah, no run, blocked off the back foot and Shah's pantomime running is on display for the first time today. He shuffled down the pitch, opened both arms to Pietersen in a call for a hug, or a run, but neither was forthcoming. Another desperate shuffle and plea for a run before he skips back into his crease

8.5

Edwards to Shah, 5 wides, yowzers! Tennis-ball bounce and it flies over the batsman and the wicketkeeper for four! This is a slippery pitch my friends

8.5

Edwards to Shah, no run, on the back foot and defending. He asks Pietersen if he'd like to run. Pietersen is not in a hurry, and who can blame him?

8.6

Edwards to Shah, no run, forward onthe front foot, guides it out to the off side

End of over 9 (5 runs) England 22/2 (RR: 2.44)

    • OA Shah 0 (8b)
    • KP Pietersen 0 (6b)
    • FH Edwards 5-1-13-2
    • LS Baker 4-3-5-0

The bowling Powerplay has been taken

9.1

Baker to Pietersen, no run, left alone outside off

9.2

Baker to Pietersen, 1 run, flicked to leg

9.3

Baker to Shah, FOUR, what a shot. Steps to leg and flicks it with those elasticated wrists over midwicket

9.4

Baker to Shah, no run, attempts a hook but can't get hold of it

9.5

Baker to Shah, 1 run, again steps outside off before turning it down to fine leg

9.6

Baker to Pietersen, no run, wide of the off stump and left alone

End of over 10 (6 runs) England 28/2 (RR: 2.80)

    • KP Pietersen 1 (9b)
    • OA Shah 5 (11b 1x4)
    • LS Baker 5-3-11-0
    • FH Edwards 5-1-13-2

I spot rain. And I spot Andrew Miller whose turn it now is. Hello. I'm mad for it, me

10.1

Edwards to Shah, FOUR, wallop. A length ball, outside off, fetched with a flourish over long-on. Extravagent

10.2

Edwards to Shah, 1 run, walking across his stumps once again, a wristy flourish and a flick to fine leg. A lot of effort for not a lot

10.3

Edwards to Pietersen, no run, stand and deliver stuff, except Pietersen can't time his flog into the off side

10.4

Edwards to Pietersen, 1 run, a hop and a clip, worked off the hip to fine leg

10.5

Edwards to Shah, no run, short, outside off this time. Shah flinches but that's safely avoided

10.6

Edwards to Shah, 1 run, a dab into the gully with an angled bat, a quick single, and England continue to regroup

End of over 11 (7 runs) England 35/2 (RR: 3.18)

    • OA Shah 11 (15b 2x4)
    • KP Pietersen 2 (11b)
    • FH Edwards 6-1-20-2
    • LS Baker 5-3-11-0
11.1

Baker to Shah, 1 run, a firm drive into the covers, but can't find the gap

11.2

Baker to Pietersen, no run, whipped to midwicket, but straight to the fielder

11.3

Baker to Pietersen, no run, forward and driven back to the bowler

"Hey dudes," begins Naren, and with an intro like that I am compelled to continue. "Why haven't the selectors picked Big Benn and Ryan Hinds? It's not fair!" No idea, dude

11.4

Baker to Pietersen, 1 run, on the back foot, Pietersen has to pedal as Simmons swoops at mid-on, but his flicked shy goes wide

11.5

Baker to Shah, FOUR, short, sits up, and flat-batted over midwicket. Top shot

11.6

Baker to Shah, no run, fuller, straighter, defended

"Well that was a heck of a powerplay by England wasn't it," notes Ed Dixon. "Strip out the extras and we managed a whopping 10 runs.....in 9 overs. Hurrah, well done lads..."

Here comes Dwayne Bravo

End of over 12 (6 runs) England 41/2 (RR: 3.41)

    • OA Shah 16 (18b 3x4)
    • KP Pietersen 3 (14b)
    • LS Baker 6-3-17-0
    • FH Edwards 6-1-20-2
12.1

Bravo to Pietersen, OUT, short, Pietersen climbs into the hook with two men back. Pollard is under a swirling skier, takes it with aplomb, and now England are in deep, deep doo-doo

KP Pietersen c Pollard b Bravo 3 (27m 15b 0x4 0x6) SR: 20.00

Bravo, Bravo. Dwayne's golden arm does the trick once again. Here comes Paul Collingwood

12.2

Bravo to Shah, no run, the onus is really on Shah now

12.3

Bravo to Shah, no run, driven firmly into the covers, but can't beat the field

12.4

Bravo to Shah, no run, down the leg-side, but Bucknor doesn't call wide as Shah walked so far across his stumps

12.5

Bravo to Shah, 1 run, short, and swiped into the leg-side again

12.6

Bravo to Collingwood, no run, good length delivery, attacking the top of off. Defended. Tidy over

And that, my chums, is drinks. What a good idea. "Get Belly back in the opener's role, at least he looked like scoring runs...until he gets out," says Barbs. Ah Belly, Belly ... whatever became of him? He's been pumping iron in the gym, apparently

End of over 13 (1 run) England 42/3 (RR: 3.23)

    • PD Collingwood 0 (1b)
    • OA Shah 17 (22b 3x4)
    • DJ Bravo 1-0-1-1
    • LS Baker 6-3-17-0
13.1

Baker to Shah, no run, outside off, and nurdled to gully

13.2

Baker to Shah, no run, tapped to cover

13.3

Baker to Shah, OUT, short, wide, slapped ... straight to backward point! A nothing sort of shot from Shah and he's paid the price, as Darren Sammy swoops low with his big hands.

OA Shah c Sammy b Baker 17 (34m 25b 3x4 0x6) SR: 68.00

My goodness me, England really are village at one-day cricket. Hamlet, even. No, isolated crofter's shack is nearer the mark. Still, here's Freddie

13.4

Baker to Flintoff, no run, diligently ignored outside off stump

13.5

Baker to Flintoff, no run, another aggressively determined leave

13.6

Baker to Flintoff, no run, outside off, pushed to point. And runs are simply superfluous right now

End of over 14 (wicket maiden) England 42/4 (RR: 3.00)

    • A Flintoff 0 (3b)
    • PD Collingwood 0 (1b)
    • LS Baker 7-4-17-1
    • DJ Bravo 1-0-1-1
14.1

Bravo to Collingwood, no run, flicked onto a good length, Bravo's wrist does all sorts of interesting tricks in the delivery

14.2

Bravo to Collingwood, no run, full length once again, straight as a straight thing

14.3

Bravo to Collingwood, 1 run, on the pads, and worked to fine leg

14.4

Bravo to Flintoff, no run, forward and agonisingly defended, all perpendicular elbows and angles

14.5

Bravo to Flintoff, no run, hopping back and across, and defended again

14.6

Bravo to Flintoff, OUT, short, leg-sided, Flintoff has a swish, and whaddaya know, he's lofted it straight to Fidel Edwards at fine leg!

A Flintoff c Edwards b Bravo 0 (5m 6b 0x4 0x6) SR: 0.00

Freddie, Freddie ...

Meanwhile, here's Matt Prior. He's got some form at least

End of over 15 (1 run) England 43/5 (RR: 2.86)

    • PD Collingwood 1 (4b)
    • DJ Bravo 2-0-2-2
    • LS Baker 7-4-17-1
15.1

Baker to Collingwood, no run, full and straight, and patted back down the pitch

15.2

Baker to Collingwood, no run, forward and defended back down the pitch

15.3

Baker to Collingwood, no run, a tiny bit of width, but not enough to tempt him out of his shell

15.4

Baker to Collingwood, FOUR, that's runs, a cool punch from an over-pitched delivery. Mid-on can't intercept

15.5

Baker to Collingwood, no run, poked into the covers

15.6

Baker to Collingwood, no run, short and wide, and patted to gully

"Dudes, if I call you dudes will you publish this?" asks Adam Humphreys. "I just want to say that England are truly, tragically, turgidly awful." I hear you, dude

End of over 16 (4 runs) England 47/5 (RR: 2.93)

    • PD Collingwood 5 (10b 1x4)
    • MJ Prior 0 (0b)
    • LS Baker 8-4-21-1
    • DJ Bravo 2-0-2-2
16.1

Bravo to Prior, FOUR, a marginal error in line, too full and leg-sided, and helped round the corner

16.2

Bravo to Prior, no run, width outside off stump, and left alone with a flourish

16.3

Bravo to Prior, no run

16.4

Bravo to Prior, no run, short, and belated evasive action from Prior. There's a bit of life in this track

16.5

Bravo to Prior, 1 run, on the pads, clipped to backward square

16.6

Bravo to Collingwood, no run, forward, and prodded to point

End of over 17 (5 runs) England 52/5 (RR: 3.05)

    • PD Collingwood 5 (11b 1x4)
    • MJ Prior 5 (5b 1x4)
    • DJ Bravo 3-0-7-2
    • LS Baker 8-4-21-1
17.1

Baker to Prior, no run, full and straight, and defended back down the track

17.2

Baker to Prior, no run, short and wide, tempts a flashy cut, but no contact

17.3

Baker to Prior, no run, big stride and defended back down the pitch

17.4

Baker to Prior, no run, forward and defended once again. What on earth can England muster from here?

17.5

Baker to Prior, no run, outside off, another violent swish, yet another non-contact stroke

17.6

Baker to Prior, no run, full and straight, and that, incredibly, is Baker's fifth maiden in an exceptional nine-over spell. Jolly well bowled

End of over 18 (maiden) England 52/5 (RR: 2.88)

    • MJ Prior 5 (11b 1x4)
    • PD Collingwood 5 (11b 1x4)
    • LS Baker 9-5-21-1
    • DJ Bravo 3-0-7-2
18.1

Bravo to Collingwood, 1 run, short, on the pads again, tucked to fine leg

18.2

Bravo to Prior, 1 run, full and straight, attacking the leg stump, and clipped to midwicket

18.3

Bravo to Collingwood, no run, flapped to point. Runs are a scarce commodity

18.4

Bravo to Collingwood, no run, forward, defended, plus ca change

18.5

Bravo to Collingwood, OUT, massive appeal, looked to be swinging late, and potentially down the leg-side, but very full indeed. Bucknor ponders for an age, which is always a worry for the batsman, and sure enough, up goes the finger!

PD Collingwood lbw b Bravo 6 (29m 15b 1x4 0x6) SR: 40.00

Sure enough, Hawkeye suggests that was a poor decision. Never mind, no referrals, spilt milk etc ... as a certain Sky and Cricinfo pundit might put it, "Staart the ca-ar!"

18.6

Bravo to Mascarenhas, 1 run, on the pads, flipped to square leg

End of over 19 (3 runs) England 55/6 (RR: 2.89)

    • AD Mascarenhas 1 (1b)
    • MJ Prior 6 (12b 1x4)
    • DJ Bravo 4-0-10-3
    • LS Baker 9-5-21-1

There's time yet, but for the misery guts among you (that's all of you, then), here are England's lowest ODI scores. 86 is the first target. They could easily sneak into the top ten (or bottom ten) though - plenty of positives to be taken...

19.1

Sammy to Mascarenhas, no run, full and straight, angling into the pads, defended back down the pitch

19.2

Sammy to Mascarenhas, no run, outside off, Mascarenhas winds up for a wipe, then decides not to, which is a shame

19.3

Sammy to Mascarenhas, no run, outside off, and beaten. Admittedly by about six inches, but an uncertain prod all the same

19.4

Sammy to Mascarenhas, no run, full and straight, and defended once again

19.5

Sammy to Mascarenhas, no run, shorter and wider, and a bit of carry through to the keeper. Still no stroke being threatened from England's six-hitting specialist

19.6

Sammy to Mascarenhas, no run, determinedly defended with a hop onto the back foot

End of over 20 (maiden) England 55/6 (RR: 2.75)

    • AD Mascarenhas 1 (7b)
    • MJ Prior 6 (12b 1x4)
    • DJG Sammy 1-1-0-0
    • DJ Bravo 4-0-10-3
20.1

Bravo to Prior, no run, full once again, worked to midwicket

"England might as well use the batting powerplay while there are batsmen..er wickets left," says Rajiv. He's got a point

20.2

Bravo to Prior, no run, forward, defended to cover

20.3

Bravo to Prior, no run, a lot more width, and an ambitious mow. No contact once again, which is odd. Prior clobbered everything in that zone during the Tests

20.4

Bravo to Prior, no run, fuller, straighter, defended

20.5

Bravo to Prior, no run, right up to the bat yet again, Prior can do no more than work the ball to midwicket. Again

20.6

Bravo to Prior, no run, a bit of late inswing on a good length. Yet again midwicket tidies up

Right, this is fascinating, but time for a change. Will Luke, over to you

End of over 21 (maiden) England 55/6 (RR: 2.61)

    • MJ Prior 6 (18b 1x4)
    • AD Mascarenhas 1 (7b)
    • DJ Bravo 5-1-10-3
    • DJG Sammy 1-1-0-0

Cheers Miller. This is all rather dramatic, isn't it?

21.1

Sammy to Mascarenhas, no run, driven sweetly to mid-off

21.2

Sammy to Mascarenhas, no run, testing line and length but Mascarenhas leaves it alone

21.3

Sammy to Mascarenhas, no run, good length, driven out to the off side

If England filed for divorce with one-day cricket, it wouldn't take the finest legal mind to ascertain who should have custody of the children. This has been a performance of turbo-powered inadequacy by their top-and-middle orders.

21.4

Sammy to Mascarenhas, no run, leaves this one alone outside off

21.5

Sammy to Mascarenhas, no run, defended out to point

21.6

Sammy to Mascarenhas, no run, steps across to defend another maiden. Lost count of how many there have been - eight? Nine? More maidens than (insert joke here)

End of over 22 (maiden) England 55/6 (RR: 2.50)

    • AD Mascarenhas 1 (13b)
    • MJ Prior 6 (18b 1x4)
    • DJG Sammy 2-2-0-0
    • DJ Bravo 5-1-10-3
22.1

Bravo to Prior, 1 run, bit too full from Bravo and England get a whole single, flicking this to leg. The crowd jeer and cheer like the irony-seeking winners that they inevitably have to be

22.2

Bravo to Mascarenhas, no run, defended out to the off side

22.3

Bravo to Mascarenhas, no run, a bouncer is ducked. Quack

Meanwhile, over at the Wanderers, Australia are going like the clappers, as well they might.

22.4

Bravo to Mascarenhas, 1 wide, wide down the leg side

More runs for England! Hallelujah

22.4

Bravo to Mascarenhas, no run, well back in his crease, nudges it to leg

22.5

Bravo to Mascarenhas, FOUR, an ugly but relievingly effective slap straight down the ground. For four.

22.6

Bravo to Mascarenhas, 1 run, turned to leg

End of over 23 (7 runs) England 62/6 (RR: 2.69)

    • AD Mascarenhas 6 (18b 1x4)
    • MJ Prior 7 (19b 1x4)
    • DJ Bravo 6-1-17-3
    • DJG Sammy 2-2-0-0
23.1

Sammy to Mascarenhas, no run, another excellent line just outside off. Too tight for him to cut, though he did ponder it.

23.2

Sammy to Mascarenhas, no run, defended out to the off side

23.3

Sammy to Mascarenhas, no run, good line just outside off and he defends on the back foot

23.4

Sammy to Mascarenhas, FOUR, a thick outside edge - deliberately played. Outside off and he flayed it wide of the slip down to third man

23.5

Sammy to Mascarenhas, 1 run, turned to mid-on and they scamper a single - in comes the throw which hits the stumps, but he's safely home

23.6

Sammy to Prior, no run, full and straight, he comes forward to defend on the front foot

End of over 24 (5 runs) England 67/6 (RR: 2.79)

    • MJ Prior 7 (20b 1x4)
    • AD Mascarenhas 11 (23b 2x4)
    • DJG Sammy 3-2-5-0
    • DJ Bravo 6-1-17-3

"Three consecutive maidens..you wouldn't see that on a Saturday night in Bolton," quips Mike. From France? Yes, from France.

24.1

Pollard to Mascarenhas, 1 run, a short-arm pull to mid-on

24.2

Pollard to Prior, no run, very straight, nudged to leg

24.3

Pollard to Prior, OUT, oh that is truly village. Short and wide and slapped straight to point. Thoughtless stroke

MJ Prior c Sammy b Pollard 7 (37m 22b 1x4 0x6) SR: 31.81

Just a reminder...England's lowest ODI score is 86. For how long, though?

24.4

Pollard to Broad, no run, wide of the off stump and left alone

"Can't we field the ladies side in the next one-day match?" wonders Mantenna. It's a damn good call. Charlotte - the men need your guidance and belief

24.5

Pollard to Broad, OUT, got him! A little off-cutter which squares up Broad, whose feet were firmly concreted, and it scooted through low to the keeper

SCJ Broad c †Ramdin b Pollard 0 (2m 2b 0x4 0x6) SR: 0.00

What a day West Indies are having! "Please make it stop! We've suffered too much!" cries an England supporter. Don't worry. Only two more to go.

Never fear, Gareth's here. Batty's average is 2.60. And it's about to tip down out there

24.6

Pollard to Batty, no run, ignored outside off

End of over 25 (1 run) England 68/8 (RR: 2.72)

    • GJ Batty 0 (1b)
    • AD Mascarenhas 12 (24b 2x4)
    • KA Pollard 1-0-1-2
    • DJG Sammy 3-2-5-0

Showery rain here - quite heavy, too. The two umpires are ignoring it for the time being

25.1

Sammy to Mascarenhas, no run, a solid defensive

25.2

Sammy to Mascarenhas, no run, a straight up-and-down delivery left alone

25.3

Sammy to Mascarenhas, 1 run, a touch of swing back into the right hander who fortunately gets bat on it

25.4

Sammy to Batty, no run, cautiously blocked by Batty

25.5

Sammy to Batty, no run, on middle-and-off, Batty is forward to defend

25.6

Sammy to Batty, no run, punched to mid-off

End of over 26 (1 run) England 69/8 (RR: 2.65)

    • GJ Batty 0 (4b)
    • AD Mascarenhas 13 (27b 2x4)
    • DJG Sammy 4-2-6-0
    • KA Pollard 1-0-1-2

Here's Mascarenhas

26.1

Pollard to Mascarenhas, no run, ooh, a thick inside edge into his boot - not far away from losing his off stump there

26.2

Pollard to Mascarenhas, 2 runs, that's well played, pulling it down the ground. The rain's slowed the outfield a bit and he can't get four

1pm Rain, rain, go away, come again in about three hours when England have lost. They're off I'm afraid. The covers are on

1.07pm Well, that was quick. Looks like they're coming back on. England's batsmen certainly are - they're well up for it.

"I've now wasted my entire afternoon off watching this dross," writes Andy Flower. I mean, Stuart Campbell.

"Perhaps the saddest statement to be made," wonders Doug, "is that I, as a Windies fan, actually feel sorry for the English fans." We've heard worse tear-jerkers, but it's a perfectly valid point.

26.3

Pollard to Mascarenhas, no run, defended on the front foot

26.4

Pollard to Mascarenhas, 1 run, slashed and flashed out to deep extra cover

26.5

Pollard to Batty, no run, good line, Gareth's back in line and defending

26.6

Pollard to Batty, no run, pushed to point

End of over 27 (3 runs) England 72/8 (RR: 2.66)

    • GJ Batty 0 (6b)
    • AD Mascarenhas 16 (31b 2x4)
    • KA Pollard 2-0-4-2
    • DJG Sammy 4-2-6-0
27.1

Sammy to Mascarenhas, no run, very straight, very full, driven back to DJ Sammy

27.2

Sammy to Mascarenhas, 1 run, crashed out to deep extra cover but he doesn't time it properly

27.3

Sammy to Batty, 1 run, Gareth forces it off the back foot for a single - and he's off the mark!

27.4

Sammy to Mascarenhas, 1 run, clipped to mid-on for another single. The runs are flowing

27.5

Sammy to Batty, 1 run, a rare mis-field by Gayle, who only occasionally looks bothered enough to move his body, at mid-off

27.6

Sammy to Mascarenhas, no run, crunched to point

End of over 28 (4 runs) England 76/8 (RR: 2.71)

    • AD Mascarenhas 18 (35b 2x4)
    • GJ Batty 2 (8b)
    • DJG Sammy 5-2-10-0
    • KA Pollard 2-0-4-2

Exciting times are upon us. England only need another 11 runs to avoid their worst-ever total in ODIs. And Gareth Batty is approaching a career-average of 3.00 which is also a moment to celebrate

28.1

Pollard to Batty, no run, on the back foot, Gareth defends

28.2

Pollard to Batty, no run, on the back foot, blocked

28.3

Pollard to Batty, no run, stylishly driven but brilliantly stopped by a short-extra-cover. West Indies' fielding has been electric all day

28.4

Pollard to Batty, 1 run, flicked around the corner

28.5

Pollard to Mascarenhas, 1 run, driven short of long-off

28.6

Pollard to Batty, no run, dropped out to the off side

End of over 29 (2 runs) England 78/8 (RR: 2.68)

    • GJ Batty 3 (13b)
    • AD Mascarenhas 19 (36b 2x4)
    • KA Pollard 3-0-6-2
    • DJG Sammy 5-2-10-0
29.1

Edwards to Mascarenhas, 1 run, back in his crease, almost treading on his stumps, whipped through midwicket

29.2

Edwards to Batty, 1 wide, down the leg side

Batty's career-average has shot above 3 for the first time. Cakes, congratulations and plaudits his way

29.2

Edwards to Batty, no run, on the back foot, defended

29.3

Edwards to Batty, no run, skips back into his crease, blocking it with a straight bat

29.4

Edwards to Batty, 1 run, flicked down the fine-leg

It's all a bit muted since the last rain break. West Indies need to finish this off, for everyone's sakes - most of all England's.

29.5

Edwards to Mascarenhas, 2 wides, down the leg side - Ramdin gets a hand on it, just

86 is England's lowest score, by the way.

29.5

Edwards to Batty, 1 run, flicked off his pads

Harry Nandkeshore has emailed and wins our heartiest congratulations for possessing the Best Name Of The Day.

29.6

Edwards to Mascarenhas, 4 byes, a fierce bouncer but it's way too short, quick and flies over batsman and keeper

And England have avoided their worst-ever ODI score. It's three fat ladies; 88 for 8

End of over 30 (10 runs) England 88/8 (RR: 2.93)

    • AD Mascarenhas 20 (38b 2x4)
    • GJ Batty 5 (17b)
    • FH Edwards 7-1-26-2
    • KA Pollard 3-0-6-2
30.1

Pollard to Batty, 1 run, nurdled for a single

30.2

Pollard to Mascarenhas, 1 run, angled out to the off side

30.3

Pollard to Batty, no run, driven to mid-off

30.4

Pollard to Batty, no run, cut to point

"Dimi and Batty look solid, pity the other batsman looked about as solid as microwaved jelly," Simon says.

30.5

Pollard to Batty, no run, just outside off, guided out to the off side

30.6

Pollard to Batty, no run, that just held up a touch on Gareth but he played it well, with soft hands

End of over 31 (2 runs) England 90/8 (RR: 2.90)

    • GJ Batty 6 (22b)
    • AD Mascarenhas 21 (39b 2x4)
    • KA Pollard 4-0-8-2
    • FH Edwards 7-1-26-2
31.1

Sammy to Mascarenhas, no run, a wide slower-ball

31.2

Sammy to Mascarenhas, no run, back in his crease, tries to whip it to leg but soon realises he can only defend it. Winner.

31.3

Sammy to Mascarenhas, no run

31.4

Sammy to Mascarenhas, no run, beaten by a beauty which lifted and left him. Sammy likes it but Ramdin doesn't. And nor does the umpire

31.5

Sammy to Mascarenhas, no run, right behind it this time, defending

31.6

Sammy to Mascarenhas, 1 run, defended on the front foot

End of over 32 (1 run) England 91/8 (RR: 2.84)

    • AD Mascarenhas 22 (45b 2x4)
    • GJ Batty 6 (22b)
    • DJG Sammy 6-2-11-0
    • KA Pollard 4-0-8-2
32.1

Pollard to Mascarenhas, 1 run, nudges this to leg

32.2

Pollard to Batty, no run, good, straight ball worked to leg by G Batty

32.3

Pollard to Batty, no run, cracked to point

32.4

Pollard to Batty, no run, defended on the back foot and again he can't steal a run

32.5

Pollard to Batty, 1 run, a flashing but underpowered drive to cover

32.6

Pollard to Mascarenhas, FOUR, four! Pulled in front of square with excellent timing

End of over 33 (6 runs) England 97/8 (RR: 2.93)

    • AD Mascarenhas 27 (47b 3x4)
    • GJ Batty 7 (26b)
    • KA Pollard 5-0-14-2
    • DJG Sammy 6-2-11-0
33.1

Sammy to Batty, 1 run, flashed down to third man

These two, dare I say it, are beginning to look quite comfortable out there.

33.2

Sammy to Mascarenhas, no run, patted to point

33.3

Sammy to Mascarenhas, 1 run, strokes this out to long-off

33.4

Sammy to Batty, no run, slower ball on the off stump which Batty defends solidly

33.5

Sammy to Batty, no run, defended on the back foot

33.6

Sammy to Batty, no run, dropped out to the off side

End of over 34 (2 runs) England 99/8 (RR: 2.91)

    • GJ Batty 8 (30b)
    • AD Mascarenhas 28 (49b 3x4)
    • DJG Sammy 7-2-13-0
    • KA Pollard 5-0-14-2
34.1

Pollard to Mascarenhas, no run, straight ball on the off stump which cuts back, and he defends solidly

34.2

Pollard to Mascarenhas, 1 run, square-cut out to deep extra cover

34.3

Pollard to Batty, no run, defended off the back foot out to the off side

34.4

Pollard to Batty, no run, good line, defended on the back foot

34.5

Pollard to Batty, 1 run, Gareth on the attack - a clumping and impressive drive but it finds long-off

34.6

Pollard to Mascarenhas, no run, left alone

End of over 35 (2 runs) England 101/8 (RR: 2.88)

    • AD Mascarenhas 29 (52b 3x4)
    • GJ Batty 9 (33b)
    • KA Pollard 6-0-16-2
    • DJG Sammy 7-2-13-0
35.1

Sammy to Batty, 1 run, too straight and he works it to leg

35.2

Sammy to Mascarenhas, no run, forced off the back foot

35.3

Sammy to Mascarenhas, 1 run, driven out to the off side

35.4

Sammy to Batty, no run, nicked to mid-on

35.5

Sammy to Batty, 1 leg bye, flicked to leg

My God this is outrageously depressing cricket. The crowd are silent and comatosed

35.6

Sammy to Mascarenhas, no run, full and straight, he comes forward to defend

End of over 36 (3 runs) England 104/8 (RR: 2.88)

    • AD Mascarenhas 30 (55b 3x4)
    • GJ Batty 10 (36b)
    • DJG Sammy 8-2-15-0
    • KA Pollard 6-0-16-2

England still haven't taken their Powerplay

36.1

Miller to Batty, 1 run, short, wide and cut for a single

36.2

Miller to Mascarenhas, no run, beaten outside off! Well bowled

36.3

Miller to Mascarenhas, no run, comes forward to defend

36.4

Miller to Mascarenhas, no run, forward, driven to mid-off

36.5

Miller to Mascarenhas, no run, well flighted on off stump and Mascarenhas again can't get hold of it

36.6

Miller to Mascarenhas, no run, squeezed out for a zero

End of over 37 (1 run) England 105/8 (RR: 2.83)

    • AD Mascarenhas 30 (60b 3x4)
    • GJ Batty 11 (37b)
    • NO Miller 1-0-1-0
    • DJG Sammy 8-2-15-0

England's official messenger, Steve Harmison, is running on with a towel. Bless. He obviously has a message. Is it Powerplay time? Nope

37.1

Sammy to Batty, no run, nice and straight and he defends

37.2

Sammy to Batty, 1 run, inside edged to leg

37.3

Sammy to Mascarenhas, no run, flicked to leg

37.4

Sammy to Mascarenhas, no run, outside off and defended

37.5

Sammy to Mascarenhas, 1 run, crashed out to deep extra cover

37.6

Sammy to Batty, 2 runs, flicked through midwicket

End of over 38 (4 runs) England 109/8 (RR: 2.86)

    • GJ Batty 14 (40b)
    • AD Mascarenhas 31 (63b 3x4)
    • DJG Sammy 9-2-19-0
    • NO Miller 1-0-1-0
38.1

Miller to Mascarenhas, 1 run, swept to square leg

38.2

Miller to Batty, 1 run, driven out to long-off

38.3

Miller to Mascarenhas, no run, nudged to mid-on

Losing the will to live, here.

38.4

Miller to Mascarenhas, 1 run, pushed out to the off side

38.5

Miller to Batty, 1 run, turned to leg

38.6

Miller to Mascarenhas, no run, cut to cover

End of over 39 (4 runs) England 113/8 (RR: 2.89)

    • AD Mascarenhas 33 (67b 3x4)
    • GJ Batty 16 (42b)
    • NO Miller 2-0-5-0
    • DJG Sammy 9-2-19-0

The Powerplay has been taken

39.1

Edwards to Batty, no run, guided off the back foot

39.2

Edwards to Batty, no run, straighter delivery turned to leg

39.3

Edwards to Batty, no run, steps to leg and tries to smite it over midwicket, but, well, he can't

39.4

Edwards to Batty, 1 run, flicked to mid-on who swoops, throws down the stumps but he's home by half a yard

39.5

Edwards to Mascarenhas, no run, defended to cover

39.6

Edwards to Mascarenhas, 1 run

End of over 40 (2 runs) England 115/8 (RR: 2.87)

    • AD Mascarenhas 34 (69b 3x4)
    • GJ Batty 17 (46b)
    • FH Edwards 8-1-28-2
    • NO Miller 2-0-5-0
40.1

Bravo to Mascarenhas, 1 run, full toss on his legs, Mascarenhas steps outside the leg stump and flickes

40.2

Bravo to Batty, OUT, terrific catch by Sammy, diving at extra cover as Batty's extravagant heave is mistimed

GJ Batty c Sammy b Bravo 17 (64m 47b 0x4 0x6) SR: 36.17

Good partnership of 48 there by those two. Good, but interminably dull to watch. James Anderson in now

40.3

Bravo to Mascarenhas, no run, fuller yorker but misdirected down the leg side

40.4

Bravo to Mascarenhas, no run, full toss, bashed to Chanderpaul at mid-off who shies at the stumps. Good work by the utter, utter legend

40.5

Bravo to Mascarenhas, 1 run, a slower ball but Mascarenhas reads it and whips it to leg

40.6

Bravo to Anderson, no run, wide of the off stump and ignored

End of over 41 (2 runs) England 117/9 (RR: 2.85)

    • JM Anderson 0 (1b)
    • AD Mascarenhas 36 (73b 3x4)
    • DJ Bravo 7-1-19-4
    • FH Edwards 8-1-28-2
41.1

Edwards to Mascarenhas, no run, flicked to mid-on

41.2

Edwards to Mascarenhas, no run, superb ball! Swings in late on his toes and he only just keeps it out

41.3

Edwards to Mascarenhas, OUT, goes for a hook but top-edges it to the running square leg - another hook shot goes all wrong for England

AD Mascarenhas c Bravo b Edwards 36 (96m 76b 3x4 0x6) SR: 47.36

And England have been bundled out for 117, their 15th worst ODI score in history. Dimitri Mascarenhas did what he could with the tailenders, but it was rather like scraping the bottom of a pot of yoghurt. We'll have the D/L target for you soon and will be back in 30 minutes. Do fire in your splenetic emails about England's frankly inept performance.

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Hours of play (local time) 09.30 start, First Session 09.30-13.00 Interval 13.00-13.45, Second Session 13.45-17.15

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