I see witnesses have come forward to defend Ben Stokes. That's great. So he can play in the Ashes then?
Well hold on a minute. Somerset and Avon Police are still investigating the incident and the ECB has suspended him indefinitely as it awaits developments.
The guy's a hero. If Stokes had saved me from a beating, I'd have been down the nick in no time. What took these guys so long?
Cricket's not their thing apparently and they had no idea who he was until a policeman knocked on the door. But according to the Sun they regard Stokes as "a real gentleman".
That's good. So now Stokes has an alibi, why not just get the first taxi to Heathrow?
It's not an alibi. The footage still shows someone who looks very much like him throwing punches. As far as that goes, nothing has changed.
It was self-defence, we all know that.
An argument of self-defence would certainly help his case. But a court might still be asked to decide whether the level of force used was reasonable based on the circumstances as Stokes genuinely believed them.
So if he is going to be charged, get on with it and find him not guilty. The first Test in Brisbane is less than a month away...
"Slow but sure moves the might of the Gods," as Euripides had it.
The wheels of justice turn slowly.
Government figures suggest it takes an average of 24 weeks between the offence and the case being concluded
But that's the end of the Ashes. And some.
The middle of March. And the same figures indicate Bristol Crown Court can take twice as long
Surely sometimes famous people deserve special treatment? This affects the enjoyment of millions of people.
All right, you've convinced me. Get him on the plane.