Those dastardly lefties

Alastair Cook’s slick hundred yesterday has prompted another rant from that guardian of fast bowlers’ clubs, Simon Hughes:

Added to that, left-handers seem to have a divine right to play and miss without ever getting a touch, and to get one out lbw is like passing through US immigration. Your attempt must meet stringent entry requirements.

Namely, 1: that the ball has pitched between wicket and wicket (ie not outside leg stump), 2: yet has moved back enough not to go on to miss them or go over the top, and 3: was delivered from close enough to the stumps to satisfy measly umpires who invariably think, 'He'll never get a left-hander lbw bowling from there'. When you appeal for one they smirk sadistically while keeping their index fingers firmly sheathed. At least they don't ask you to remove your shoes.

And in a typically erudite rant in The Daily Telegraph, Martin Johnson grumbles about the changing world of modern sport – cricket in particular.

It's definitely becoming more boring being a professional sportsman. Tiger Woods is out of bed and doing his press-ups before the milkman has set off on his round, snooker players are going to the gym, and there has even been the occasional sighting of a darts player sipping mineral water and wearing a shirt with less material than your average family camping tent. Cricket used to be the most unhealthy game of the lot. A fried breakfast, pot of tea and biscuits before play, a four-course lunch, jam scones in the afternoon and several pints of ale and a curry at night.