The Heavy Ball

Time is healer, time is killer, time is light, time is darkness

Yes, it's time to check in on what your favourite stars have been broadcasting

"Dear lord, me posterior"  AFP

Tino Best's modesty corner
"Training like an Android...#traininsaneorremainthesame"
@tinobest
Androids don't train, Tino. They're built for purpose. Their bodies don't adapt to training overload, improving as a consequence. They're machines. If anything, regular use will cause their components to deteriorate.

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"Another week of hard work #traininsaneorremainthesame ...sprints + Mileage +Bowling with Coach Drakes #95mphalways .."
You see! It was 97mph last week. You're slowing down.

The footwear
"Saw @Swannyg66 in the nets earlier wearing pink boots. He's changed."
@JimmyAnderson9

The round
"Order is 6 pints of Wainwrights .... Bloke from Essex orders a glass of Chablis"
@BumbleCricket (David Lloyd)

The stolen phone
"My wife is so amazing!! I'm punching above my weight!!!"
@si610 (Simon Jones) (although actually, it was his wife who wrote that)

The diet
"That greasy chip butty I had for my tea last night is still lingering...."
@VaughanCricket (Michael Vaughan)

The sense of direction
"If anyone sees a White Jaguar in one of the Trafford Centre car parks please tweet me the location. I've lost it. And now I'm lost."
@StuartBroad8

The invasion of privacy
"Don't u love it when u standing at the urinal and another dude asks for '1 snap'... Ahh, gotta love India"
@DaleSteyn62

The bike ride
Andrew Flintoff is cycling 2,872km for charity. How's he getting on?
"On the start line 183km to go"

"I am now going to sit in a bucket of sudacrem , cycling is not fun , another 186km in the bag"

"My body wasn't designed for cricket and definately wasn't for cycling ! I have come to the conclusion i was built for darts !"

@flintoff11

Maybe he'd feel differently if he hadn't taken that 3km detour.

Film appreciation with Graeme Swann
Last week he was struck by 'the disparity in fitness between Katie Holmes and Maggie Gyllenhaal playing Rachel Dawes in the Batman movies'. This week he went for something more cerebral.

"Finally got round to watching the king's speech tonight (thought I'd give motd a miss) My crush on Helena Bonham Carter has intensified"
@swannyg66

"It was a cracking film by the way. Especially seeing as I found a bit of Easter egg in the fridge to help me through"

Tourist information service
"A visit to theTaj Mahal, which took 22 years to build, perfection takes time! Worth the visit."
@Brad_Hogg
The 41-year-old Hogg could perhaps also acknowledge that there's a fine line between taking your time and dawdling. Also, if he considers himself the Taj Mahal of cricket, as he is perhaps implying here, he might like to ponder the fact that it's a mausoleum. Anyway, speaking of time…

What's your philosophy?
"Time is valuable, time is money, time is healer, time is killer, time is light, time is darkness"
@Saqlain_Mushtaq
Time isn't darkness. The absence of light is darkness. Time is a magazine - he could have had that one.

Getting to know God
"The 19th over changed everything for us. It is definitely one of the most exciting overs I have seen in my life....."
@sachin_rt
It's tempting to read something into that ellipsis at the end, isn't it? What could it mean? He's so enigmatic.

Life lessons from cricketers
"Last night I realised that I must remember my key next time if I don't want to be stranded outside my house in a sari"
@isaguha

Isa GuhaDale SteynSaqlain MushtaqMichael VaughanDavid LloydJames AndersonJames AndersonBrad HoggSimon JonesAndrew FlintoffSachin TendulkarTino BestStuart BroadAlviro PetersenGraeme Swann

Alex Bowden blogs at King Cricket