Tour Diary
Net run-rates are so much fun
Even when Scotland took the final wicket to beat UAE, not only did we not know who had qualified for the 2011 World Cup, but we weren’t sure which six teams had ODI status
Will Luke
25-Feb-2013
Even when Scotland took the final wicket to beat UAE, not only did we not know who had qualified for the 2011 World Cup, but we weren’t sure which six teams had ODI status. Such is the nature of cricket, and the really rather ridiculous reliance on Net Run-Rates (or NRR for acronym anoraks), but it provoked silly scenes on the outfield. Scotland were warming down and Pete Steindl, their coach, was half-chatting and half looking in my direction. We’d agreed on a post-match interview. But there was little point in chatting until I knew whether to grill him a) on Scotland losing their status as an international country, b) on his joy of Scotland reaching the World Cup in the most unlikely of circumstances or c) on his relief, and luck, at not making the World Cup but still retaining their status.
It’s high time one of Cricinfo’s unheralded members receives a worthy plug. Robin Abrahams (aka The Oracle) has worked for us since the dawn of time, when Yahoo! were king of the interwebs, John Major was in office and the term credit crunch hadn’t been invented. Without Robin, Cricinfo would probably not exist. In fact, he hasn’t slept since the mid 1990s – too busy ensuring our tables are up to date, scorers have internet access, and a myriad of other vital things besides. So I called the Abrahams Hotline who immediately had the details. And the details of the details. And the reasons behind the details. And something about a flag? Just in the nick of time, the cheery Steindl loped over as I hung up, and the first question? “Well, Pete, a good win today – and you’re into the top six I hear. You must be relieved.” Almost as relieved as I was. Thanks Robin.
Full postBBC Scotland? No. BBC Persia
Scottish cricket isn’t as feverishly followed as Scottish football – understandably so, perhaps, given Scotland’s listless performances in the World Cup Qualifiers – but of all the media groups, you’d think BBC Scotland might be interested in
Will Luke
25-Feb-2013
Scottish cricket isn’t as feverishly followed as Scottish football – understandably so, perhaps, given Scotland’s listless performances in the World Cup Qualifiers – but of all the media groups, you’d think BBC Scotland might be interested in covering them. That’ll be a no, then. BBC Persia, however, are keen, whose cameraman has been following Afghanistan’s progress throughout the tournament. Having spent the morning in the sun under a black floppy hat, sweating profusely, BBC Persia’s lensman eagerly looked forward to a slap-up lunch. Unfortunately, he was pointed to the wrong place; by the time he found the press box, your loyal reporter and his colleagues had devoured most of the (exceptional) chicken, rice, salad, fish and ice cream much to his f-bombing chagrin.
Full postFrancois Pienaar on the IPL
With my dogged persistence, and his generosity – not to mention the miracle of hands-free mobiles – I interviewed Francois Pienaar a few days ago ( here , at our sister site, Scrum.com )
Will Luke
25-Feb-2013
With my dogged persistence, and his generosity – not to mention the miracle of hands-free mobiles – I interviewed Francois Pienaar a few days ago (here, at our sister site, Scrum.com). I couldn’t ignore the opportunity to talk about the IPL. Our chat was brief, but his passion for South Africa and all it stands for remains undiminished, 14 years after he stood on the podium to receive the rugby World Cup from Nelson Mandela. It’s one of those sporting images tattooed on your skull and difficult to forget. Tyson and Bruno is another of mine. Gascoigne in tears. Flintoff and Lee. Tyson eating ears…
But anyway. IPL. I wanted to find out from Pienaar his thoughts on South Africa’s infrastructure, given that all of a sudden it is the go-to country to host world-class sporting events. “The IPL has been a journey and a half,” he said. “To put this tournament in place in 20 days flat has been inspirational, to be honest.”
Colleagues and residents of Johannesburg have shown a little less enthusiasm, in particular at the road networks. Yes, they’re being modernised, widened, and coating a layer of western tarmac over the top of the concrete (which doesn’t split as easily in the heat, I’m told), but there is so much to be done. Recently, the Australia (cricket) team were politely mobbed (oxymoron spotters, pat yourselves on the back) at an airport, so lax was the security. I naively enquired about the train infrastructure to a taxi driver when I first arrived. “You’d be dead man, dead,” was the chilling response. There is a train for tourists with tourist-like prices, but suffice to say that it’ll be cars and planes which transport people over the next few weeks.
Full postNo sympathy for Bermuda
Will Luke
25-Feb-2013
It has been fascinating hearing from other teams, players and coaches about Bermuda’s stumble-and-fall from this competition and, without exception, not a single one of them has any sympathy. In fact, their responses have often been a mixture of envy and anger – anger that a team of handsomely-paid full professionals could consistently perform so poorly while they (be it Ireland, Namibia, UAE) all struggle on a pittance and yet outperform their higher-paid opponents. It’s unjust, but sport is often so. Scotland have begun professionalisation (they have three contracted players and promise to double that number should they qualify) while Ireland are also hamstrung financially and only possess semi-pros.
As an indicator to Bermuda’s apathy, one coach told me he saw many of their players either in the bar or, on the first night of their trip, in the local casino. Not the ideal preparation to qualify for the World Cup Qualifiers (WCQs), you might think, and you’d be spot on too. As Gus Logie told Cricinfo a few days ago, the desire and hunger just hasn’t been there. It’s all been a bit of a jolly for the past four years.
Full postWelcome to the Sandton Sun Hotel
Visiting the Sandton Sun Hotel in Johannesburg is rather like popping in for lunch at a rich relative’s house in the shires
Will Luke
25-Feb-2013
Visiting the Sandton Sun Hotel in Johannesburg is rather like popping in for lunch at a rich relative’s house in the shires. Unless you actually live there, the opulence is almost overwhelmingly in your face. The lifts silently glide up and down a brass-cum-gold framework, like little golden jelly beans. There are no normal light fittings, instead a garish display of brass pipes demands your attention that the café is, in fact, right here, as if you could possibly miss it. There are dozens of staff, all of whom glide through the air looking very busy, yet the moment they spot your cup looking empty they’re onto it in a flash.
It’s a quiet, subdued place to stay and is currently swarming with international cricketers. The Associates were here first, but the Indian Premier League players have started their unerring swagger into the city and the hotel, and soon it will be theirs - if, that is, they can drag the Afghanistan team out of the pool. The battle will be long and hard I fear, and my money is on the Afghans.
It’s a nice place to work, too. A couple of interviews with an Irish and Namibian player happened randomly over coffee outside, a relaxed environment which helps both interviewee and interviewer.
All sorts have been spotted. Owais Shah and Ashish Nehra (remember him?) ambled in for a late brunch, neither of whom were keen on being interviewed – understandably so given your reporter’s Keith Chegwin-esque doorstepping method. Glenn McGrath, in flip-flops and t-shirt, did a spot of shopping in the equally brilliant shopping centre which adjoins the hotel. Dave Warner, Paul Collingwood and other Delhi Davedevils are floating around too, invisibly so far. Red-and-white Europeans, of which I proudly claim membership of its sunburnt fraternity, make up the rest.
Full postBaby's got the bends
Lighthouse Family, Radiohead, Counting Crows – it’s like being back at school, here at the LC de Villiers Oval, where Namibia are taking on (or trying to) UAE
Will Luke
25-Feb-2013
Lighthouse Family, Radiohead, Counting Crows – it’s like being back at school, here at the LC de Villiers Oval, where Namibia are taking on (or trying to) UAE. Radiohead is a particular favourite of the DJ-cum-PA, Anton, who is providing occasional witty (and, indeed, occasionally witty) updates from the other matches taking place, interspersed with some of the 90s classics. “Oman, the great entertainers,” he croons, “were going along nicely. But wickets are falling faster than the rand.” As third man let through a four in front of his coach, Colin Wells, Radiohead’s The Bends roared out from the speakers to entertain the three fans and two journalists. “My baby's got the bends, oh no//We don't have any real friends, no, no, no.” Wells, who is desperate to improve UAE’s fielding, shook his head and walked on in disgust.
Full postWatch out, kids: the food-fascists are after you
Forget the IPL; ignore the piddly little World Cup Qualifiers
Will Luke
25-Feb-2013
Forget the IPL; ignore the piddly little World Cup Qualifiers. Oxfordshire Under-13s are on tour in South Africa, and this is where the action is at. Flippancy aside, there is much to be learned of the differences in attitude between the two countries when you look at the development. And I may even have a possible indicator as to South Africa’s recent resurgence.
The English coach spoke to me today (over bacon and eggs – more on that later) over the contrast in attitude. Oxfordshire’s sprightly (and noisy) group are just about holding their own. The coach is fairly confident that two or three will play for a county; his opposite numbers are also sure that some of their young bucks will represent South Africa. Plenty of ability, then, but the coaching beliefs and attitudes are where the similarities between the two countries end.
When I was 13 (and, for those interested, a rather brilliant legspinner), I didn’t much care what I ate. Twelve roast potatoes was my record at school, yet still I remained bean-pole thin and a relative wizard-with-a-wrong’un. I’m pleased to report that these Oxfordshire Under-13s also share Britons’ craving for an unhealthy breakfast of sausage, bacon, eggs and worse. Their South African counterparts, however, are already at the mercy of dieticians, video-analysers, fitness coaches, physiotherapists and a whole army of personnel dedicated (and no doubt paid handsomely) to enhance their performances.
All fatty foods and carbs are off the agenda because, apparently, the brief sugar highs (remember those?) later cause lethargy in the field. The English coach was in awe of his South African counterpart, a towering behemoth of an Afrikaner who cuts the kids’ fizzy-drink intake and bans all sugar. My surprise quickly turned to outrage. Despite the encouraging results, are these food-fascists going to help these impressionable and ambitious young cricketers develop as people? And is cricket now so business-oriented, so intent on producing identical sportsmen off a conveyer belt of strict regimes and rigid policies, that even the naivety of youth is being curtailed? Er, that’ll be a yes then.
Full postAge will not weary them. No, really
My quest to discover the real age of Afghanistan's cricketers continues apace
Will Luke
25-Feb-2013
My quest to discover the real age of Afghanistan's cricketers continues apace. An unnamed source close to the team for a number of years told me today that one of their players, who sadly must remain nameless for now, claims to be 25 but is in fact "more like 40. Come on. Look at him. He's been playing forever". Forty might sound unduly harsh, and that's because it is. When challenged, my source relented and we agreed on "anywhere between 35 and 38". The player himself simply has no idea; not even his own mum can tell him, though each year she gives a ballpark figure ranging from 21-29, though perhaps her vagueness smacks of her own disbelief at the unstoppable sands of time, and the years that can't help but condemn.
Full postA casual chat
Will Luke
25-Feb-2013
It isn't often you can chat casually with an international batsman waiting to make his nervous way out to the middle. In fact, for "often", read "never", unless you happen to be another batsman waiting.
After a brief chat with Colin Wells, the former England and Derbyshire allrounder now coaching UAE, Raees Ahmadzai was keen to show me his ridiculously-light bat. I didn't see the makers' name, but it was like a feather. And small, too, for someone of 6ft, but it felt perfect in my hands.
Full postMystery and the Mouth
An encounter with former New Zealand left-arm spinner John "Mystery" Morrison
Sidharth Monga
25-Feb-2013
John “Mystery” Morrison aka the Mouth. Or “Mystery and the Mouth”. A former Test player who is now a city councillor in Wellington. The best man to talk to when rain and spirits are coming down. Not for nothing did he get those nicknames.
First an explanation for the names. “When I first got picked for Wellington, Don Neely, who is now the president of New Zealand Cricket, reckoned that my bowling was hopeless,” Mystery says. “And he couldn’t work out why I was getting so many wickets in local tournaments. And I bowled slow left-armers, and he reckoned they did nothing. I said they do a lot more. Just that you can’t work it out, and neither can any other batsman.
Full post