Shah Rukh Khan saves the day

Many will understand my irritation when I saw Shah Rukh Khan had found his way into international cricket too, blowing kisses even as the cricket game was being played. He was here for a “concert” later in the night to commemorate 150 years of Indians in South Africa. As that show failed to match up to the good start provided by a percussion group – there is only so many seconds of tribal dance and saree-clad women you can show for India - South Africa unity without causing nausea - to my horror I found that Khan rescued it.

It was no mean feat, for he had to begin by getting rid of the after effects of a cringe-worthy speech from Anil Kapoor. It didn’t look good when Khan called Rusty Theron on to the stage. It didn’t look good when Khan challenged Theron to a rap-fest, and did a mock rap himself. Obviously he knew better. Theron was soon on fire, rapping the crowd into delirium. And when he was done, he dropped the mike down on the floor, with full rapper attitude.

And then Khan called JP Duminy up. And as good comic acts should, Khan picked up the most recent thorny issue, sledging between the two teams in the Test series. Here Khan asked Duminy who bothered them the most from the Indian team. “Harbhajan [Singh],” Duminy said. So Kahn started teaching Duminy what to say when Harbhajan sledges him. “Teri main phaad ke rakh doonga [I’ll rip your … (those dots are always left unfilled)]”. Going by direct translation, it should not be published on a family website, but it is so common a usage it obviously doesn’t hold its literal meaning now.

Next one on Duminy’s list was Sreesanth, and Khan’s advice was similar. Both the teams were loving it by now. Duminy then taught India a couple of common abuses in his language. Less than a week ago, these matters were getting out of hand. And here, thanks to Khan, both teams were laughing it off, even though the act itself had to be a rehearsed one. Not sure this harmony will stay when Sreesanth and Graeme Smith see each other next time, but here was yet another addition to the list of things Khan is better off doing than acting.