'If you start singing again I'm calling the police'

If it's a good joke, it doesn't need to be explained.

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If it's good music, it doesn't need to be turned down.

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How questionable is questionable?

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Craig McMillan should take note: this is how you sing along.

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If it's a good film, it gets good reviews, no?

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Being as Rotten Tomatoes compiles its scores from the published opinions of hundreds of film and television critics, you're going to have to hold an awful lot of employers responsible. Maybe Locke's just not to your taste. Craig Kieswetter's got a recommendation though.

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From bad films to badmind. Kemar Roach has brought us a new verb.

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He's also brought us a new medical condition.

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And speaking of bad, is Michael Vaughan still #justsaying things?

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He is. For future reference, here's a better way of wording the same sentiment, Michael.

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Of course no one's actually just saying things on Twitter. They're just writing them. This can really expose you on those occasions when you get a word or phrase wrong.

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Stuff like that can pass people by when it's buried amid a load of other speech. Some sounds are unmistakeable, however - like this one from Lancashire's Tom Smith.

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This week we found out what Kemar Roach's daughter is called.

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You're not wrong.

Finally, Dimuth Karunaratne gives us his philosophy.

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Or perhaps that's just a weather warning, what with Sri Lanka and England trying to play out a one-day series during monsoon season.