West Indies in England, 2009 May 14, 2009

Test cricket needs Gayle

32

At last, the waiting is over. Again. A tortuous, seemingly endless five entire days with no Test cricket have finally wended their pointless way into the history books, and the long-awaited England versus West Indies rematch now marches towards its thrillingly decisive climax at the Riverside today. The Wisden Trophy is still literally anyone’s. The two captains have been at each other’s throats like two top surgeons in a one-on-one emergency tracheotomy competition. And the Ashes (not to mention West Indies’ forthcoming home clash with Bangladesh) loom with massively gargantuan enormity as the players strain every conceivable physical and mental sinew to touch the elusive heavens of cricketing immortality. Truly, the eyes of the universe are trained through excited binoculars on the green Durham sward, and it is hard to envisage that this will not prove to be the greatest match cricket has ever seen.

Perhaps I am guilty of talking things up a little. The advance ticket sales suggest I may even be guilty of talking things up more than a little. Following three days of medium-to-low calibre action at Lord’s, and with the West Indian captain essentially proclaiming that he would rather be doing something else somewhere else than spending a long weekend standing outside in the north of England in the middle of May, the cricketing public is showing little appetite for this game. In fact, it is pushing this game around its plate. It may nibble the odd morsel, but it is clearly watching its weight and saving itself for a far more satisfying main course – Ashes pie.

The first Test was an unsatisfying match, despite its nail-biting denouement. Admittedly, it was only nail-biting for the friend with whom I watched the evening session of day 3 – he had tickets for day 4, and would have missed out on his refund if the West Indies had resisted until stumps. The tension in his wallet was unbearable.

England played well enough, but the startling ineptitude of their opponents in the field and with the bat renders judgement largely irrelevant. If the Australians are not quite quaking in their boots, it is at least partially because the Ashes remain sufficiently far away that they have not yet put their boots on.

Here, then, are the official Confectionery Stall Conclusions To Be Drawn From The First Test:

  • England’s main concern will be about Ravi Bopara. He is clearly a good player, and, on the evidence of his last two Test innings, a lucky one. However, questions must be asked about his temperament under pressure. He had a chance to carve himself a unique place in the history books – he could have been the 700th player to be out in the 90s in Test matches. No-one could ever have taken that away from him. Instead, he played himself calmly to a century, the 3281st century in Tests, yet another name on an overfilled honours board. He had the chance to make his mark by throwing his innings away to any one of the 20 balls he faced after passing 90 before reaching three figures. And he blew it.
  • Graham Onions, after perhaps the most inept two-ball start to a Test career (100% bowled out by a full toss, then a long-hop demolished to the boundary), showed himself to be a decent bowler, and his giddy enthusiasm was magnificent to see. He prompted some slightly overexcited comparisons to Glenn McGrath. Other than a good action and a propensity for skittling teams out in Lord’s Tests, this may be a little premature. Onions’ first-class economy rate is 3.7, compared to McGrath’s 2.5. Onions has also thus far shown no capability for unleashing needless barrages of verbal abuse into batsmen’s faces. If he wants to match the Australian’s 563 Test wickets at 21, he will have to work on both of these aspects of his game. The McGrath-style batting is clearly almost there.

    However, the British media clearly do not consider Onions to be a long-term prospect. They blew every conceivable onion-related headline and wordplay at the first available opportunity, rather than pacing themselves over a 70-Test career. Already, journalists and sub-editors will be rifling through their recipe books trying to find more onion-based dishes in case the Gateshead Goliath transpires to be one of England’s greats.

  • Tim Bresnan will never be a Test cricketer. Unless he stops (a) being given out lbw when the ball was not even contemplating hitting the stumps, and (b) not having to bowl very much.
  • Those wickets in the West Indies really did flatter the batsmen and insult the bowlers. A boring five-day Test is much, much more boring than a boring three-day Test.
  • History will never know whether Chris Gayle would have played better or worse had he arrived more than two days before the game began. He would certainly have played in the same way. Arguably, he would have been stroppier for having had to leave the IPL even sooner. In fact, it is possible that Gayle had too much acclimatisation time. If he had arrived just in time for the toss, he might not have had time to remember that he doesn’t like Test cricket much any more.

On then, to the Riverside, the mostly empty Riverside. During his entertaining to-and-fro with Gayle, Andrew Strauss said: “The important thing is that Test cricket gets the attention it deserves. And that means that people prepare themselves properly for any Test match you play. You don’t want Test cricket to be devalued in any way, shape or form.”

These are noble thoughts, which all Test fans would support. But these words ring a little hollow before a Test at a ludicrous time of year against a team that had not been planning to be involved. Test cricket is the pinnacle of the game, but it is not always treated as such by its authorities. Teams (both home and away) are habitually underprepared, some are depopulated by the tedious political squabbling over the ICL, series are raced through at breakneck speed, and pitches are often designed to provide time-span rather than contest. Test cricket is increasingly often devalued in many ways, shapes and forms.

Gayle’s recent mutterings to the media also proved what a phenomenal entertainer the man is, both on and off the pitch. After encouraging Strauss not to “sleep with Chris on his mind” (sage advice at any time, unless the Chris to whom he was referring was Chris Tavare, who was often prescribed as an insomnia cure by the NHS in the 1980s), Gayle bemoaned how the demands of captaincy force him to go through innumerable onerous tasks. “There’s always something you have to go and do, you know, extra,” said the Kingston Cavalier. “Lunch or dinner, some other thing.” These, of course, are meals of which Gayle would normally steer well clear. He is very much a breakfast, elevenses, teatime nibbles and bedtime snack man. The fact that he is prepared to alter his dietary timetable for the needs of the team is a mark of the man.

England should win this game – they have beaten West Indies in 11 of the past 13 Tests in this country, and it seems unlikely that Gayle’s comments about wanting to give up the captaincy and not being particularly fussed about the future of Test cricket will serve to inspire his troops to follow their captain in a Test match. Let us hope it is a better game than Lord’s, however, and that Captain Chris enjoys it. He might not need Test cricket, but Test cricket needs him.

Andy Zaltzman is a stand-up comedian, a regular on the BBC Radio 4, and a writer

Comments have now been closed for this article

  • safwan on May 16, 2009, 16:35 GMT

    well dun andy.....u make us smile.....the humour is very subtle and witty...n test cricket does need gayle more then he needs it, he is amongst the last few remaining beacons of hope and excitement left in the game!!!

  • jogesh99 on May 16, 2009, 9:04 GMT

    So now know the identity of the secret KKR blogger - it's Gurveer Singh Kaller - the only man in Buchanan's stable with a sense of humour.

  • girlie on May 15, 2009, 21:47 GMT

    frankly i am sick of this entire fiasco. whether west indies had nine days to prepare or not the fact is this is a young side who had to fight for the trophy over 5 gruelling test matches and yet the value of that is being demorilised by a 2 match series. I frind this rediculous.Yes the pitches were flat in the WI but our bowlers had to bowl on it as well not just the english. I think Chris is frustrated with the fact that this seroies was just shoed in and i personally believe its just a sad, low and pathetic attempt to gain back the trophy quickly and painlessly. lets be fair here. even the english that live in this weather 24/7 are freezing down at chester lee street. what does that say about our Caribbean boys who have been there a mere few weeks. Franly if my boys do lose this series i wont be disappointed and i know that our win in the west indies was hard fought on grueling batsman friendly pitches, whilst this one was just over a period of 2 matches.

  • waterbuffalo on May 15, 2009, 14:25 GMT

    Yes, the windies had nine days of preparation but they were in England as replacements and one can see why Gayle was more than a little miffed at Strauss' remarks. I remember when England last won the Ashes, their next opponent was Pakistan, and Mr. Strauss did not make the tour because his wife was giving birth. Evidently Strauss thought holding a video camera and giving out cigars and drinks was more important than the sanctity of Test Cricket at the time. Pakistan won that Series 2-0 but it did not matter to Strauss because they had just won the ashes, just like this two test series does not matter to Gayle because the Windies had just beaten England in the Carribean. Changing tack, I hope the pitches for the Ashes will not be as bland and lifeless as the track for this test. Hope to see a lot of ducking, weaving and plonking on the head in the Ashes. Something that you will never ever see in the batsman's paradise that is 20/20.

  • Saravanan.NB on May 15, 2009, 5:46 GMT

    Andy, I was expecting some of your own "Onion" catch phrases.

  • redneck on May 15, 2009, 5:30 GMT

    love the diatry requirments and mcgraths batting avg. bloody funny mate! @ giri you have to be kidding me or either watching the ashes on mute! the barmy army dont shut up long enough for us aussies to cheer or do anything when the ashes are here! and in england in 05 the manchester test the atmosphere was electric i even picked up on that from here in australia! in contrast the nagpur test last year i could here the groundsman fart through the ground microphone the stadium was that empty! i think you could knock any other country for poor test crowds except australia and england. the ashes are between australia and england who cares if no other nation cares no ones making you watch it, just like the last pak v ind series it didnt even get shown on cable tv here in australia!

  • Marcus on May 15, 2009, 2:46 GMT

    The West Indies should have put up a better showing in the first Test, I agree, but who'd have thought that all of Gayle, Sarwan and Chanderpaul would get failing scores?

  • davo on May 15, 2009, 2:39 GMT

    the ashes the ashes the ashes...............thats all you here ENGLAND talk about everytime they play a team other than AUSTRALIA........it was SO DEGRADING TO ALL WEST INDIAN FANS(IM A WEST INDIAN) TO ACTUALY HEAR THAT AT THE START OF THE RECENT SERIES IN THE CARIBBEAN W.I vs ENG WAS BEING USED BY ENGLAND AS PREPARATION FOR THE "ASHES"........how can a team that ruled cricket for such a long period of time be used as preparation?it was good to see ENGLAND get a beating & i hope they get a 5-0 in the ashes because they thats all they're concerned with

  • davo on May 15, 2009, 2:32 GMT

    personally,& i mean PERSONALLY, i simply hate the IPL. i dnt mind ICC T20 matches but the IPL is destroying the greatest test of all, TEST CRICKET. lets face it, can someone like ANDREW STRAUSS play T20?i dont think so but yet he is an outstanding test cricketer & has made his name not by hitting it out the park but by playing proper cricket shots.BRENDON NASH has been a great find for WINDIES in test cricket but will he ever play T20?dont tink so....but yet wit only a couple test matches under his belt he has already transformed from a domestic AUSSIE cicketer to a reliable WINDIES middle order batsman & he is already internationally recognized...did IPL or ICC T20 do it for him?I think the IPL should either be squashed or be a reduced tournament that fits in the ICC FTP because SRI LANKA has already chosen it over THE GOD OF CRICKET, TEST CRICKET. something needs to be done urgently because in order to be called a great cricketer, YOU MUST BE A GREAT TEST CRICKETER!!!!!!!!!!

  • Andrew on May 14, 2009, 22:36 GMT

    I liked your article Andy. The way i see it those who like to be challenged and challenge themselves would rpefer test, the others who want a bludge and a paycheck will choose T20. To all those people talking about the ashes being over-rated etc. I do get the feeling that neither of you guys are Australian or English so i understand. But from our point of view this is more than just a test series. The ashes is a rivalry that goes beyond just cricket and money etc. It is the complete opposite to what the IPL is about.It is about pride and tradition.Its about not letting the other guys have bragging rights as all sports in Australia there is a Aus-Eng rivalry and we don't want to let the poms claim bragging rights in any of them

  • safwan on May 16, 2009, 16:35 GMT

    well dun andy.....u make us smile.....the humour is very subtle and witty...n test cricket does need gayle more then he needs it, he is amongst the last few remaining beacons of hope and excitement left in the game!!!

  • jogesh99 on May 16, 2009, 9:04 GMT

    So now know the identity of the secret KKR blogger - it's Gurveer Singh Kaller - the only man in Buchanan's stable with a sense of humour.

  • girlie on May 15, 2009, 21:47 GMT

    frankly i am sick of this entire fiasco. whether west indies had nine days to prepare or not the fact is this is a young side who had to fight for the trophy over 5 gruelling test matches and yet the value of that is being demorilised by a 2 match series. I frind this rediculous.Yes the pitches were flat in the WI but our bowlers had to bowl on it as well not just the english. I think Chris is frustrated with the fact that this seroies was just shoed in and i personally believe its just a sad, low and pathetic attempt to gain back the trophy quickly and painlessly. lets be fair here. even the english that live in this weather 24/7 are freezing down at chester lee street. what does that say about our Caribbean boys who have been there a mere few weeks. Franly if my boys do lose this series i wont be disappointed and i know that our win in the west indies was hard fought on grueling batsman friendly pitches, whilst this one was just over a period of 2 matches.

  • waterbuffalo on May 15, 2009, 14:25 GMT

    Yes, the windies had nine days of preparation but they were in England as replacements and one can see why Gayle was more than a little miffed at Strauss' remarks. I remember when England last won the Ashes, their next opponent was Pakistan, and Mr. Strauss did not make the tour because his wife was giving birth. Evidently Strauss thought holding a video camera and giving out cigars and drinks was more important than the sanctity of Test Cricket at the time. Pakistan won that Series 2-0 but it did not matter to Strauss because they had just won the ashes, just like this two test series does not matter to Gayle because the Windies had just beaten England in the Carribean. Changing tack, I hope the pitches for the Ashes will not be as bland and lifeless as the track for this test. Hope to see a lot of ducking, weaving and plonking on the head in the Ashes. Something that you will never ever see in the batsman's paradise that is 20/20.

  • Saravanan.NB on May 15, 2009, 5:46 GMT

    Andy, I was expecting some of your own "Onion" catch phrases.

  • redneck on May 15, 2009, 5:30 GMT

    love the diatry requirments and mcgraths batting avg. bloody funny mate! @ giri you have to be kidding me or either watching the ashes on mute! the barmy army dont shut up long enough for us aussies to cheer or do anything when the ashes are here! and in england in 05 the manchester test the atmosphere was electric i even picked up on that from here in australia! in contrast the nagpur test last year i could here the groundsman fart through the ground microphone the stadium was that empty! i think you could knock any other country for poor test crowds except australia and england. the ashes are between australia and england who cares if no other nation cares no ones making you watch it, just like the last pak v ind series it didnt even get shown on cable tv here in australia!

  • Marcus on May 15, 2009, 2:46 GMT

    The West Indies should have put up a better showing in the first Test, I agree, but who'd have thought that all of Gayle, Sarwan and Chanderpaul would get failing scores?

  • davo on May 15, 2009, 2:39 GMT

    the ashes the ashes the ashes...............thats all you here ENGLAND talk about everytime they play a team other than AUSTRALIA........it was SO DEGRADING TO ALL WEST INDIAN FANS(IM A WEST INDIAN) TO ACTUALY HEAR THAT AT THE START OF THE RECENT SERIES IN THE CARIBBEAN W.I vs ENG WAS BEING USED BY ENGLAND AS PREPARATION FOR THE "ASHES"........how can a team that ruled cricket for such a long period of time be used as preparation?it was good to see ENGLAND get a beating & i hope they get a 5-0 in the ashes because they thats all they're concerned with

  • davo on May 15, 2009, 2:32 GMT

    personally,& i mean PERSONALLY, i simply hate the IPL. i dnt mind ICC T20 matches but the IPL is destroying the greatest test of all, TEST CRICKET. lets face it, can someone like ANDREW STRAUSS play T20?i dont think so but yet he is an outstanding test cricketer & has made his name not by hitting it out the park but by playing proper cricket shots.BRENDON NASH has been a great find for WINDIES in test cricket but will he ever play T20?dont tink so....but yet wit only a couple test matches under his belt he has already transformed from a domestic AUSSIE cicketer to a reliable WINDIES middle order batsman & he is already internationally recognized...did IPL or ICC T20 do it for him?I think the IPL should either be squashed or be a reduced tournament that fits in the ICC FTP because SRI LANKA has already chosen it over THE GOD OF CRICKET, TEST CRICKET. something needs to be done urgently because in order to be called a great cricketer, YOU MUST BE A GREAT TEST CRICKETER!!!!!!!!!!

  • Andrew on May 14, 2009, 22:36 GMT

    I liked your article Andy. The way i see it those who like to be challenged and challenge themselves would rpefer test, the others who want a bludge and a paycheck will choose T20. To all those people talking about the ashes being over-rated etc. I do get the feeling that neither of you guys are Australian or English so i understand. But from our point of view this is more than just a test series. The ashes is a rivalry that goes beyond just cricket and money etc. It is the complete opposite to what the IPL is about.It is about pride and tradition.Its about not letting the other guys have bragging rights as all sports in Australia there is a Aus-Eng rivalry and we don't want to let the poms claim bragging rights in any of them

  • Vikram Maingi on May 14, 2009, 20:19 GMT

    This kind of comment from Chris Gayle was a surprise. How could one expect test triple- ceenturian pass this type of a comment. ODIs came, test cricket lost its popularity to some extend. Tests started regaining popularity since 2005 due to 50 over matches bacoming boring. And this led to advent of 20-20 cricket. The ups and downs in the popularity of Test cricket will be there, but this form of the game will dedfinitely stay.

  • Manzur Khan on May 14, 2009, 19:28 GMT

    i laughed so much reading this that i caused a stir in my family ...and they had to enquire about my well being at mid-night...i am so happy having discovered you.....reading your bio caused me pain in my tummy and my throat is soar even now with the laughter....cricket needs Andy Zaltzman....

  • has9 on May 14, 2009, 18:34 GMT

    i definitely agree with your comment on how the test cricket is being pushed aside even by the authority themselves, flatter pitches, tighter schedules and demanding cricketrs to focus in formats that are a lot more stressful and pays least at the same time. this is tough time for test cricket to stay alive, dont blame the playes for being less responsive, we are all here for the money and entertainment in someway or other. But i have to say the comment on windies series with bangladesh cracked me. and yes 5 days of boring match is worse than 3 days of boring test match. Finally, Zalztman, i wish you were a commentator, this game has hardly ever had any interesting one, Boycott was but doesnt do much these days and Dean Jones was great but messed a little with that Hashim Amla comment. Good job!!

  • kevon on May 14, 2009, 17:12 GMT

    how is gayle .the game that bring bread on this table he want to quit

  • giri on May 14, 2009, 15:13 GMT

    hilarious! and i agree with Dim Rat. the ashes has to be the most overrated series in the cricket calender. i mean over a hundred yrs of the ashes and there r not more than 3-4 ashes that have really captured the imagination of the public. neither have the contests been close nor have the spectators been passionately vocal at the venue. ind-aus, aus-sa have been more exciting in recent yrs.

  • Tom on May 14, 2009, 14:44 GMT

    Maybe next year Gayle should get injured, fully recover and then claim he's fully fit to play the test series. Then he's sure to be left in the IPL with Bravo.

  • Ankur on May 14, 2009, 14:37 GMT

    Andy you are the best! Gurveer Singh, you need a psychiatrist or a counsellor, or maybe just a dictionary, to show you what 'satire' and 'humor' mean. Or maybe you should just rot in the dry, humorless desert that is your life.

  • elsmallo on May 14, 2009, 14:32 GMT

    Good post mr Zaltzman. But I'm hoping Mr Gayle will be brought to his senses sooner rather than later. As Benicio Del Toro (as Che Guevara) says in the film Che: "Little boy, no-one is so necessary or indispensable in this life...Don't go thinking that you are indispensable." Although I'm not sure I'd call Chris Gayle a little boy... not to his face anyway. But in sport as life, you never know what's going to happen, and you are only as good as your last performance. Glenn McGrath can't get a game in the IPL at the moment for Pete's sake! I know I'd rather captain the West Indies than open for the Kolkata Knight Riders, and I'm not even West Indian.

  • Edson on May 14, 2009, 14:28 GMT

    Good! article,West Indies Criket administrator should not have taken this tour at this time. Administrators must think of the players and the Spectators and planned Test matches so that teams can be properly prepared for them. Test matches in April in England will benefit only one team;England. Not even the fans are enthused as can be seen from the support at Riverside.

  • mark hesling on May 14, 2009, 14:28 GMT

    The West Indies had three three day first class warm up matches in three different grounds before the Test series started. I can't class this as meaning that they are underprepared and if they are, that is their issue, they have had plenty of time and practise.

    If you can't be prepared after nine days of first class cricket then you shouldn't be playing.

    Extremely funny article, as always.

  • suhas on May 14, 2009, 14:17 GMT

    Andy, I know this is a bit far out but I have no other line of communication open to you I thought of using this medium. I hate 20-20, the IPL, the ICL and I think Test Cricket as a product is very marketable- its tougher but I think it will provide much richer eyeballs than 20-20 does if packaged right. So, i think the inherent value of test cricket needs to be built as a business case rather than as a mere statement of intent by well-meaning (but powerless in the cricket world)people like Strauss as it will not achieve much especially when pitted one-on-one against phonies (but powerful in the cricket world) like Modi. I think your blog gives you the vent, but would you want to do more. Please drop me a line in case you do- I have some thoughts about how we can go about it (and just in case it is a parameter in your decision-making, I can assure you that my business credentials are quite all right)

  • watcman on May 14, 2009, 13:37 GMT

    Test cricket needs Gayle? Andy...please stop smoking that cheap stuff. We have better test players around than Gayle.

  • JP on May 14, 2009, 12:42 GMT

    A witty piece indeed! The opening paragraph and the Onions-McGrath part of it need special mention. Keep it coming Andy. This is hilarious.

  • saurabh on May 14, 2009, 12:20 GMT

    Mr. Gurveer Singh Kaller, You have failed to understand the subtle and witty undertones that Andy has provided through his writing. Read the article again to understand what he meant by getting out in 90s :-)

    Andy, you are exceptional

  • praveen on May 14, 2009, 11:57 GMT

    i dont know whether test cricket needs gayle but cricinfo surely needs andy zaltzman!

  • praveen on May 14, 2009, 11:52 GMT

    i dont know whether test cricket needs gayle but cricinfo surely needs andy zaltzman!

  • Lain on May 14, 2009, 11:49 GMT

    Witty! Especially the piece about Onions.....And I agree with Andy; this is an unprepared Windies team, rather reluctant to play the game to the hilt and the spectators know that.

  • Sean on May 14, 2009, 11:26 GMT

    Obviously Mr. Gurveer Singh Kaller has very little with the art of witty sarcasm. Great post Andy, and definitely true, Test cricket needs Gayle more than he needs the game sadly enough.

  • Dim Rat on May 14, 2009, 11:25 GMT

    funny stuff.. esp the playing with food type reference. altho u shud really say it's mostly just the british and aussie public who really are waiting impatiently for that series :) i personally hope england gets thrashed again and keep losing at cricket for the simple fact that i want it back on free tv! selfish? you bet i am!

  • agm on May 14, 2009, 11:03 GMT

    perhaps the funniest zaltzman yet!

  • Owen on May 14, 2009, 10:50 GMT

    Spot on, as ususal. Particularly enjoyed the Tim Bresnan observation.

  • Gurveer Singh Kaller on May 14, 2009, 10:46 GMT

    How the hell can someone be expected to take a dive in the 90s just to become the 700th person to do it? That is stupid, I'd rather prefere to be out a Golden Duck! Well done Ravinder Singh Bopara - (Ravi Bopara).

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  • Gurveer Singh Kaller on May 14, 2009, 10:46 GMT

    How the hell can someone be expected to take a dive in the 90s just to become the 700th person to do it? That is stupid, I'd rather prefere to be out a Golden Duck! Well done Ravinder Singh Bopara - (Ravi Bopara).

  • Owen on May 14, 2009, 10:50 GMT

    Spot on, as ususal. Particularly enjoyed the Tim Bresnan observation.

  • agm on May 14, 2009, 11:03 GMT

    perhaps the funniest zaltzman yet!

  • Dim Rat on May 14, 2009, 11:25 GMT

    funny stuff.. esp the playing with food type reference. altho u shud really say it's mostly just the british and aussie public who really are waiting impatiently for that series :) i personally hope england gets thrashed again and keep losing at cricket for the simple fact that i want it back on free tv! selfish? you bet i am!

  • Sean on May 14, 2009, 11:26 GMT

    Obviously Mr. Gurveer Singh Kaller has very little with the art of witty sarcasm. Great post Andy, and definitely true, Test cricket needs Gayle more than he needs the game sadly enough.

  • Lain on May 14, 2009, 11:49 GMT

    Witty! Especially the piece about Onions.....And I agree with Andy; this is an unprepared Windies team, rather reluctant to play the game to the hilt and the spectators know that.

  • praveen on May 14, 2009, 11:52 GMT

    i dont know whether test cricket needs gayle but cricinfo surely needs andy zaltzman!

  • praveen on May 14, 2009, 11:57 GMT

    i dont know whether test cricket needs gayle but cricinfo surely needs andy zaltzman!

  • saurabh on May 14, 2009, 12:20 GMT

    Mr. Gurveer Singh Kaller, You have failed to understand the subtle and witty undertones that Andy has provided through his writing. Read the article again to understand what he meant by getting out in 90s :-)

    Andy, you are exceptional

  • JP on May 14, 2009, 12:42 GMT

    A witty piece indeed! The opening paragraph and the Onions-McGrath part of it need special mention. Keep it coming Andy. This is hilarious.