'Slept like a baby!'
This week's Twitter round-up features electrifying updates from the IPL teams, a carefree attitude to the preservation of one's vehicle, and food destruction going up a notch. We also learn a thing or two about hashtags #butnothinguseful.
It's here. Follow the franchises' official Twitter feeds to fill your timeline with gold such as this:
"How's the mood #Warriors! Are YOU ready to #RoarLikeAWarrior ? #PWI"
The half century
Alec Stewart turned 50 this week. Matt Prior congratulated him.
Shane Warne also congratulated him.
Kevin Pietersen has some advice.
What if that's where you yourself have parked, which is incredibly likely? If you keep the ball down, you can't be caught out, nor will you have to pay for a new windscreen.
The popularity contest
Paul Collingwood had a rude awakening.
It was a reference to the Aussie Rules team. Paul decided that he didn't like them either because they play in black and white stripes like Newcastle FC.
The film review
Surrey's Steve Davies watched a classic.
"Karate kid part 3, absolute classic! #danielson"
No, wait. Karate Kid - absolute classic. Karate Kid part three - insipid follow-up.
Tino Best's modesty corner
Tino's started using his own name as a hashtag.
It's referring-to-yourself-in-the-third-person-for-the-internet age.
Life with Kemar Roach
Hold tight. Kemar's been on a real rollercoaster ride since we last checked in with him.
"Sooo Loving Life Right Now!"
A downbeat way to end the week, but never mind - the evidence suggests that things will pick up again.
What's your philosophy?
South Africa's Colin Ingram.
Learn from the best, Colin. Shaun Pollock would never employ an entirely irrelevant hashtag.
Niall O'Brien doesn't want to embrace treachery until all the facts are in.
Don't commit to a change until you've got something in writing, Niall.
What does Luke Pomersbach do to a buffet?
That was an unexpected turn of phrase.
Kemar Roach has raised the bar.
Alex Bowden blogs at King Cricket