The embodiment of "passive-aggressive". So laidback, he's comatose. Occasionally stoops to running between wickets - when he's had enough of finding the fence. Has been known to hit sixes while retreating out of the path of bouncers. Congenitally unable look unhip - even when wearing a tinselly black-and-gold vaudeville-trouper uniform.
No one has done more for the cause of sunglasses in cricket. Also, was unflappable before being unflappable was a virtue. (See: MS Dhoni.)
He who laughs last laughs best.
At the Stanford 20/20 for 20 last year, where after England had stopped just short of telling the tabloids what they would do with the prize money, Gayle and Co. walked away with the cash.
"Spend it, maan." Though after he actually won, he said the first thing he would do was find his brother a doctor who could fix his heart ailment. The big softie.
Don't sweat the small stuff. (And it's all small stuff.)
It don't mean a thing if it ain't got that bling.
His middle name is "Henry". Memo to opposing teams: use while sledging.
Can sleep standing up and drifts off during games, team meetings and suchlike, sheltered by his impenetrable sunglasses.
Tiffany and Co is kept afloat in these recessionary times by Gayle single-handed. Respect.
A career in hip-hop. Apart from those metal brace things on the teeth, he's got it all.
Sweating, showing agitation or concern, getting into ungainly postures while fielding, and other uncool stuff like that, y'hear?
At the 2006 Champions Trophy, when he indulged in a peculiar form of sledging-cum-dancing, following Michael Clarke around the pitch, nearly climbing onto his shoulders while muttering the lyrics to a popular reggae hit of the day.
"I've been really, really stressed out" he said after winning the Stanford 20-million dollar game. Well, blow us down and knock us over.
He is into r n' b, as opposed to Coldplay. Matthew Mott, assistant coach of the Kolkata Knight Riders made this horrifying revelation recently. Millions fainted on the spot.
Sat on the sidelines for a few games, looking bored.
Hit it into the stands looking bored, wearing a devastating Sheikh-of-Araby black bandanna.