tip and run, into the off side, a quick glance at Hales, who is on his way, and there it is. England have utterly shellacked South Africa in the first of three T20s!
9.18pm So, that's it for now. AB de Villiers admits he and his batsmen found it difficult to get it off the square today, which is putting it mildly. A very strange performance all round. See you on Friday for match No. 2!
9.10pm Well, that was comprehensive. AB de Villiers and Farhaan Berhardien ground out a puzzling slow century stand that gave the impression of demons in the wicket. But England just put their feet down the track and battered the ball to all parts. But for an aberration from Jason Roy, who was looking in top form for his 28 from 14, England would surely have backed themselves to win this by ten wickets. Not a resounding omen for the coming couple of games.
Hypocaust: "What a strange match. England turned up but I think South Africa's performance bordered on unprofessional. Wonder what associate and affiliate nations think when they see a full member treat an official T20 International with such disinterest?"
Matt: "Well played Sam Billings" Quite so. A resounding winner of the #ThanksForComing Trophy. The other contender, Eoin Morgan, at least made the one big call of the night, getting Mason Crane into the attack at precisely the right moment to settle the nerves of a young legspinner who looked the part in four very tidy overs.
Anonymous: "Bairstow better than Root? I think so." Careful, you can get charged with sedition for such anti-establishment cricketing opinions these days...
short, and through to the keeper. That's called as one for the over, but it's not a wide. Good ball
dinked over the wicketkeeper's head, that's stunning batting. A decent bouncer, angling into the batsman, who leans out of line and dabs it to the fence. Scores level!
Safferabroad: "I can't take it anymore. This SA team is hopeless, no spine, no guts, no point. De Villiers hasn't the foggiest idea of how to be a captain. I've been offered seats for one of the tests and am wondering if it's worth the bother. Please put a stop to this!!!" Don't despair, AB won't be captain for the Tests. (Or, actually, in the side at all ... ah... hold that thought...)
skids through a touch this time. But the game is long gone
lofted drive, down to wide long off
a huge wipe across the line and for once there's no connection. Even the keeper is startled as the ball burrows through his gloves
loose, not very loose, but Bairstow banjaxes that one through the covers, to bring up a rocket-speed fifty!
good delivery, tweaking from middle and off, and defended
Farrukh : "I can bet a million that this isn't a used pitch! " You're not wrong...
on the pads, whipped square, and Bairstow shows no ill-effects as he sprints back for two
Bairstow is taking a breather, he's down on one knee, and looking a bit glum. Has he tweaked something? It might be the heat... he's taking a glug of something isotonic. I think he'll live
Liam: "Bairstow's good at singles and boundaries. Literally suited to any format, any situation"
no mistake this time from Hales! This one goes where the first was intended, 20 rows back over long-on!
high, too high, and dropped! Oh, that's terrible. Hales was right underneath the ball, and so too was the fielder at long on, but he buttered the ball straight through his fingers and over the rope
tidy wicket-to-wicket delivery. Blocked
drilled into the covers once more
ironic cheers as the ball is successfully gathered this time
crushed through the covers, and a valiant diving attempt to intercept the ball at deep extra. Got a hand to the ball, but could only parry it to the rope, ten yards further round
outside off, chopped hard to point where Parnell gathers with an energetic dive
on the back foot, tapped back to the bowler
Debbie: "England has something to prove.....As hosts of the Champions Trophy they couldn't even make it to the final. #justsaying" #Valid
tucked to leg
shimmies across the crease, and slapped over backward square. Too short, and too slow. So much time to adjust and dispatch with a disdainful pull
cut to third man