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The Heavy Ball

Imagine

Old songs rewritten with a cricket flavour. First up: a John Lennon ditty

Deepak Gopalakrishnan and Krish Ashok
13-Feb-2011
John Lennon profile

"I'm just sittin' here watching the heavy roller go round and round"  •  Getty Images

A song written by a young Australian fast bowler on his first visit to the dustbeds of the subcontinent - where he's predictably getting flogged by the batsmen. To be sung to the tune of John Lennon's "Imagine"
Imagine the grass is even
Not easy, you can try
No hell facing us
No sixes in the sky
Imagine all the pitches
Seaming for today, oohoohooh
Imagine all the countries
Coming here to play
The batsmen making merry
And the bowlers getting flayed
Imagine all this outfield
With a little less… dewwwwww.
You may say I'm a seamer
But I'm not the only one
I hope some curator will hear us
We'll take more wickets than one
Imagine no five-fors
I wonder if you can
Don't know if I can take a wicket
Let alone bowl to a plan
Imagine we're all at Perth
Sharing 20 scalps… Yeahaaaah
You may say I'm a seamer
But I'm not the only one
I hope these guys come down under
And then we will have some fun