'About last night. Five magnums of Chocolate Block, 35 beers'

We all know how Kevin Pietersen likes to start the day.

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Oh. We meant coffee actually.

Never mind. His other recent obsession's still intact: diligently trying to create a laddish hard-drinking reputation for himself.

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It's all a bit embarrassing really.

And so's this.

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But better embarrassment than excitement at the minute.

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The match brought excitement for Jake Ball too. If you're wondering what his nickname is…

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Nice.

Things were no less thrilling beyond the boundary. Test Match Special commentator Charles Dagnall was a man on a mission.

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Truly, he is a man of action.

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Meanwhile, Mitchell Johnson's still getting compliments.

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And someone in the same hairdresser as Jimmy Neesham would appear to be trying to attract some positive words through other means.

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Well they do start asking you if you want them trimmed when you reach a certain age. Is that what you mean?

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Yeah, different thing.

Somewhere in the world there is always a cricketer complaining about air travel.

Doesn't matter whether it's for work…

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Or pleasure…

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Hashim Amla almost managed to combine his complaint with an in-flight selfie.

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Ahmed Shehzad did a pretty good job though. He forgot to wear sunglasses, but otherwise this is pretty much textbook.

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