Doug Bollinger May 16, 2014

'The best thing about being a fast bowler is, you can hit people'

Doug Bollinger on hating his nickname, autographing underwear, and the ground that does the best teas

Wikipedia reckons you were "no more than an enthusiastic but erratic bowler during the early days". What's your reaction to that?
Same old, same old! Nothing changes now. I'm just older and fatter.

Were you big into your sports as a kid?
Massively. I always wanted to play as much as sport as I could and get dirty. I played soccer, rugby league, golf. I didn't start cricket until I was 15.

You once grabbed your Australia shirt and kissed the beer logo instead of the national coat of arms. What happened?
I got a five-for, got too excited and got them mixed up! It was funny, though, looking back.

Your nickname is "Doug The Rug". Do you like it or loathe it?
No way, no, it isn't. I absolutely hate it.

What is the funniest thing you have seen happen on a cricket field?
I've seen a couple of captains put fielders in the stands to get the games moving. That's pretty funny.

Which batsman in world cricket have you found it hardest to bowl to?
Mike Hussey has got to be up there but I'll go with Virat Kohli.

What is the best thing about being a fast bowler?
You can hit people.

And the worst?
You get very sore.

Who is the best-looking man in Australian cricket?
Davey Warner would love me to say him but I'm not going to give it to him. Steven Smith.

Who is the biggest dressing-room joker in the Australia set-up?
Ah, this one's Davey Warner.

If the Australian boys had a boxing competition, who would win?
Brad Haddin. He does a lot of boxing.

Who is the worst singer?
Watto [Shane Watson]! No, I'll go with Bucky [Chris Rogers].

What form of the game do you enjoy playing the most? I still love the cream wear. The whole mental aspect and the new ball, the middle-over ball and the reverse-swinging ball - it makes for fantastic cricket.

Which ground in world cricket does the best teas?
I reckon Lord's. I had about three dinners and two lunches in one day once.

Where do you keep your first baggy green?
In my drawer next to my bed.

How long will England take to reclaim the Ashes?
Hopefully as long as it took us to get them back. All being well we'll stay fit and healthy and it'll be another thrilling series next summer.

What is the strangest thing you have been asked to sign?
Someone's undies. He had a beer belly too.

What is the best meat to have with a roast dinner?
You can't go wrong with lamb.

If you could swap jobs with anyone in the world for a day, who would it be?
Oh mate, it has to be Phil Mickelson. It has to be, doesn't it?

Good shout. Or Roger Federer?
No way. Imagine being Mickelson going around Augusta. That would be out of this world.

What is the best ball you have ever bowled?
It'd have to be a reverse-swinging yorker. I like bowling those too. Hang on, no. I bumped out Sachin Tendulkar in the IPL in 2011 at 149 clicks. It'd be that.