'Smile while you still have teeth'

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Hmm. What? Don't know what you're on about.

So it's 2017 then. Will the new year bring changes? Will Shaun Pollock finally renounce his long-standing habit of tweeting trite sayings all the time?

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Unless he was just trying to get the last of it out of his system, we'll take that as a no.

What about Chris Gayle. Is he likely to tone things down a touch in the coming year?

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Again, that's probably a no.

Will Shane Warne stop pushing his faintly creepy Warnemojis?

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No.

Will Michael Clarke develop a decent sense of humour?

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No.

Will Ahmad Shahzad stop quoting himself?

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No.

Will Umar Akmal stop publishing faintly ridiculous photos of himself pretty much daily?

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No.

You start to ask yourself in what sense this year is actually "new". Seems much the same as the old one.

We suppose that all that has really changed is that another year has passed.

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Test Match Special's Jonathan Agnew was awarded an MBE in the New Year Honours. And he'd like it acknowledged.

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But apparently theirs isn't a unique relationship. It seems that all you have to do to earn such a unique gift is be a BBC sports broadcaster.

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If this is a bit lowbrow, you might want to skip the next tweet too.

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Somewhere in the world there is always a cricketer complaining about air travel on someone else's behalf.

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Elsewhere in the world there is always a cricketer complaining about jet lag - or boasting about their ability to evade it.

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Even if they aren't doing so in words.

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Although those plane-sleeping skills are perhaps more a result of circumstance, because a few hours earlier…

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We think you'll agree that's a pretty strong way to finish. We can't imagine for a minute that Mark Richardson would deem such an outro "social media crap".