The Gold Rush

A young fast bowler (YFB) enters an interview hall. YOS, off-spinning mate from his state team, crosses him at the door. Some batsmen are seen exchanging heated words with security personnel at the gate. A banner outside the hall reads "Recruitment of bowlers for Indian Test team". A few good men (FGM) are waiting. They stop shaking their heads and face him.

FGM-1: I must say that you look impressive, boy. Tell us what you can do for the team.

YFB: (clears throat) Good morning gentlemen. I came across your newspaper ad for this walk-in. Sir I am a fast bowler. After working up a rhythm I bowl at a pace that batsmen do not relish. I own a deceptive slower, a kicking-off-good-length bouncer and an accurate yorker. I mix all of these weapons sparingly and generally stick to an off stump line.

FGM-2: Anything more?

YFB: I am pretty quick in the outfield and all my skippers will tell you I am a safe catcher. And I am in fine form this first class season.

FGM-3: But can you bat?

YFB: I'm afraid I am not too good at it.

FGM-3: Thanks. You may leave now.

YFB walks away, but turns back at the door. Eagerness drips from his countenance.

YFB: I would like to know of my chances Sir.

FGM-2: Zero.

YFB: (looking quizzical)

FGM-3: Well young man, you just disqualified yourself.

YFB: (still looking quizzical)

FGM-1(sympathetic soul): Here are some interesting facts for you son. We played 5 bowlers in Faisalabad and they scored 322 of the 603 we scored in the 1st innings. That's 51.74%! You take the England series that ended yesterday. 45.5% of the 323 Indian 1st innings runs in the Nagpur Test came from the last 5 wickets.

FGM-3: We played 4 bowlers there. We reverted back to 5 in our last two matches and lo - the figure went up to 54.7% for the 2nd Test, 49.1% for the 3rd. Now we know why the boys never put up a 400 on board in the series versus England. It was real poor work from us and we take all the blame. This recruitment camp aims at addressing that issue.

YFB: Does that mean 6 bowlers-who-can-bat in the Test side ?

FGM-2: You said it. Good day!