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Tests of Character
Discover yourself by taking our quizzes
What sort of review would you carry out?
'Tis the season for navel-gazing. Let's indulge
Your first-class system has been churning out batsmen clueless about playing the moving ball, the short ball, the spinning ball… in short any ball that does anything. What do you suggest in your report?
It's not the batsmen and system at fault here. It's the pitches overseas that are dodgy
Cancel first-class cricket. It's to blame, of course
Re-lay all the pitches in the country, increase pay for first-class cricketers, make that tournament competitive, and make it mandatory for selectors to watch all first-class games.
Your away record is appalling. What do you do?
Give the top performers in domestic cricket opportunities to play overseas during the off season
Sack all the players who played in those appalling away games
Schedule more home games, of course
What will be the title of your review?
A Foreign Conspiracy
Towards a Better Future
Heads Must Roll
Your selectors' decisions have been ridiculous enough to be featured on Page 2. How do you rectify that?
You don't. All publicity is good publicity
Legislate that the selectors be stoned by the public
Change the panel. Pick people who have in-depth knowledge of the available talent
Will you hold the captain responsible for losses?
Yes, and all those who captained the side in the previous decade
Yes, as the leader he needs to take a portion of the blame
What's the point? The captain doesn't score all the runs and take all the wickets, does he?
How do you solve the problem of frequent injuries?
Suggest the appointment of a head of fitness who oversees the health and workload of all contracted players
You'll get injured if you play a sport at the top level. You can't fight fate
What about scheduling?
Ask the ICC to redo the FTP
What about it?
Look at giving players two reasonable breaks during the year; and put in place a player-rotation system
Would you restructure the administration as well?
Have I been speaking pig Latin all this while?
Of course, officials are as accountable as players
In times of strife it's best to keep old institutions intact, so there is minimum panic
Will the Twenty20 league phenomenon feature in your review?
Yes, we will suggest an increase in pay for international cricket to compete with the T20 leagues
We will also be publishing a book of short stories, each of which ends with the demise of a player who got caught in a web of corruption when he signed on to play T20 franchise cricket.
The sheer brilliance of its existence? Yes, it will
What message will your review send out?
No one is coming out of this alive
We will not be swayed by popular opinion that our cricket has gone to the dogs
We will recover our past glories, and become stronger as a unit
More in Page 2
'Why did I bother buying day 5 tickets?'
No day five contest at Newlands after Kagiso Rabada took a ten-for to wrap up the series win for South Africa
The chants of Virat-Virat are here to stay
A see-saw day at the Wankhede, including a Kohli century and a boisterous crowd made it a memorable occasion
Smith and Guptill light up Sydney
Two memorable centuries, including the highest individual score at the ground, plenty of boundaries and a decent atmosphere at the SCG's first international of the home summer
The Dubai sauna gives a suffocating welcome
The heat and the one-sided encounter were downers but this Pakistan was happy that at least his team won
A triumphant Lord's return
Pakistan thrilled one and all in their first Test at Lord's since 2010, giving their fans the experience of a lifetime
Kick-starter Roy aiming to kick on
Desert T20 win a proud stage for me to retire - Mangal
Bowlers put Gujarat on top after Gandhi's 169
Abbott, Botha cameos put Sixers in semis
Kohli's India aim to maintain winning streak
Australia's versatile squad throws up plenty of choices
On the tour of India, selectors will have to solve the No. 6 riddle, get the batting order right, and strike a good balance between pace and spin
How do I explain cricket to my first-born?
Living in the US, far away from the beating heart of the game, a father wonders how he can get the next generation to fall in love with it
Might cricket ban close-in fielders some day?
ruminates on health and safety issues in the game, and how we might deal with them in the future
When Schultz slung 'em in
South Africa's Brett Schultz was fast and fearsome, but for all-too-short a while
'My father's contribution to the game has been extraordinary'
Richard Hadlee talks about the lessons he learnt from Walter, and the competition he enjoyed with brother Dayle
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