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Tests of Character
Discover yourself by taking our quizzes
Where would you bat in a Test line-up?
The 2000th Test is coming up. We're doing our bit
What is the purpose of batting?
To hit the ball
To show my team-mates how it's really done
Do I have to bat?
To take my average sky-high
To build a platform
To you, the bowler is:
Someone you don't mess with
The guy you have to frustrate
A good chap, but he doesn't worry me
One who bowls balls
The guy who bowls in your good areas
How do you treat a new ball?
I wouldn't have to if some clowns knew how to do their jobs
The same way I treat the old ball
Watch it out of the bowler's hand, read the line and length and give it a good thwack
With caution, because it tends to swing and move off the seam
When you play a stroke:
Your team-mates seem oddly surprised
You don't. You dead-bat it
It stays hit
You drive gloriously through the covers and elicit oohs and aahs from the crowd
You close your eyes first
What do you do if the bowler keeps bowling outside the off stump?
Upper-cut him for six over third man
Don't go fishing?
Get inside the line and flick it to midwicket
Watch it into the keeper's glove
Bowl outside off stump to ME? I'll sledge the ^%#&$*
What would you have done if you had encountered Bodyline bowling?
Hooked it, obviously
Taken it on the chest like my bros Fingo and Woodfull
No matter what line it is. Just see and hit
Okay, shut up, that's not funny
It's an un-Australian question. I won't answer it
Your favourite shot?
The elaborate leave
A six over the bowler's head and a five-second-freeze in the follow-through (to oblige the photographers)
The one that gets me a single
I'd like to say the cover-drive, but really, I have so many
Anything that gets runs
How do you react when you get out to a bad decision?
"No matter. Next time I'll make a triple"
"You win some, you lose some"
"*&^!!## It's a conspiracy. They're always out to get me. No wonder my average suffers"
"Don't think I'm not reporting you for this"
Scurry back to the pavilion, in case the umpire changes his mind
How do you spend the time before you go out to bat?
Eating a lot of candy. That takes the edge off
Telling your team-mates what went wrong with their innings
Joking and chatting with your team-mates
Listening to soothing music
Watching some of your classic innings
What does "being in the zone" mean to you?
You haven't actually been in one yet but you're sure if the umpires don't mess up, you'll get there
Where you should be - down the non-striker's end
Seeing the ball as big as a football
When the bowler realises it's futile to try and dismiss you, and just bowls where you want him to
Who is your batting hero?
The guy who hogs the strike
Sets up the team score really well
Is what I count up to between overs to keep calm
Is good before lunch. And 250 by stumps
Is just round the corner for me
Is a way to get closer to that rat of a Sachin
If your partner runs you out, you will:
Bang your bat on the ground and let him know what an idiot he is
Say "*&^!!## It's a conspiracy. They're always out to get me. No wonder my average suffers."
Shake your head and walk away
Shake his hand and walk away
Laugh. Shit happens, no?
More in Page 2
Smith and Guptill light up Sydney
Two memorable centuries, including the highest individual score at the ground, plenty of boundaries and a decent atmosphere at the SCG's first international of the home summer
The Dubai sauna gives a suffocating welcome
The heat and the one-sided encounter were downers but this Pakistan was happy that at least his team won
A triumphant Lord's return
Pakistan thrilled one and all in their first Test at Lord's since 2010, giving their fans the experience of a lifetime
A match that transcended the ordinary
A fan hears "the sound that will live on in my memory for the rest of my life" during the India-Bangladesh game
An 800-km train journey to watch two special wins
A long journey, queues and ticketing troubles could not take away from the great show that Afghanistan and Scotland put on in Nagpur
Maharashtra deny Karnataka Pandey's replacement
Webster 122* sets Victoria 361 target
Sayers trumps Stobo in thrilling SA win
Westley and Foakes revive England Lions
Patel, Sabbir, Franklin take Rajshahi into final
Here's to Test cricket conferences, not tiers
Why a conference-based Test championship might be a viable way forward
What makes a good ghost?
The Cricket Monthly December issue
The joys of (not) watching cricket
Few other games lend themselves to taking your eyes off the action as much as ours does
Shaun Udal's last-chance saloon
The former England offspinner relives the Mumbai Test of 2006, which turned out to be his last - and most memorable
The Mumbai hand behind Hameed's rise
Vidyadhar Paradkar knew Haseeb Hameed would go far since their first meeting - and he has played no small part in that
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