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Graeme Swann: sorely missed
Sure, he took wickets, but his key contribution to the England side was in a different area
Alex Bowden
26-Dec-2013
Whenever any senior player retires, he leaves a uniquely shaped hole. No replacement will do the exact same things, and so sometimes a team will need other players to step up, put their hands up and come to unanticipated parties. England coach Andy Flower called a press conference to outline how the England camp is going to cope with one particular aspect of Graeme Swann's absence.
Flower: Graeme Swann has left a gaping hole in the team and it is proving harder to fill than anticipated. It was the first team meeting after he left when the desperate situation became starkly apparent. Two players, attempting to converse, got caught in a platitude cycle and were unable to escape.
Reporter: What do you mean by that?
Full postCricket plays spoilsport, emerges winner
And other news you'll wish you had missed from around the cricket world
R Rajkumar
23-Dec-2013
Cricket plays spoilsport, emerges winner
Much to a lot of people's chagrin, cricket emerged the winner at the Wanderers. The Test match swung from one extreme to the other, with both India and South Africa finding themselves in seemingly clear-cut winning positions, only for both teams to be cruelly denied as the game snatched all the glory in the end.
Much to a lot of people's chagrin, cricket emerged the winner at the Wanderers. The Test match swung from one extreme to the other, with both India and South Africa finding themselves in seemingly clear-cut winning positions, only for both teams to be cruelly denied as the game snatched all the glory in the end.
"To be honest, the game really didn't deserve to win this match, not after everything we put into it," said an exhausted Faf du Plessis in his post-match comments. "South Africa should have won; it's just not fair."
Duncan Fletcher, meanwhile, was fuming. "The game of cricket can go **** itself," said the normally placid coach. "Hasn't it won enough matches as it is without having to claim this one as well?"
Full postA Christmas card from the Englands
What a certain cricketing family has been up to this year
Alan Tyers
20-Dec-2013
You know those really smug people who put a printed circular inside a Christmas card telling you all about what their family has been up to this year? Here's one from the Englands.
Hi everyone!
Gosh, another year nearly past - where does all the time go?! Jimmy says "Playing bloody cricket constantly until we're exhausted" - but we think he's just in a grump because he's never really recovered from the family trip to Nottingham in the summer.
Full post'Breaking news: I can dance again'
Crucial information about cricketers and their lives, right here on our Twitter round-up
Alex Bowden
19-Dec-2013
On the field, the battle for the Ashes may be over, but off the field, the Twitter battle between England and Australia is- well, to be honest, there is no battle. Not unless a point is scored for every inanity, in which case THE BATTLE IS WELL AND TRULY RAGING.
The result
Every Aussie enjoyed the day of victory, but none more than Joe Scuderi.
Every Aussie enjoyed the day of victory, but none more than Joe Scuderi.
Best day ever. Aussies win the ashes n KISS will be inducted into the rock n roll hall of fame. Happy birthday n merry Christmas to me !!!!!
— Joe Scuderi (@JoeScuderi1) December 17, 2013Touring, who doesn't love it?
Playing the game, enjoying fine times with like-minded types, rubbing against people from other countries in a mutually pleasing fashion? Nice
Matt Cleary
16-Dec-2013
While idly couch-surfing TV channels the other day, I came across The Sound of Music. And there on my flat screen were the von Trapp children and their maid Greta, singing about their favourite things. There were soft fuzzy mittens and whiskers on kittens, and brown-paper packages tied up with string that were chockfull of methamphetamine hydrochloride, the drug commonly known as "ice" - though I made it up. It was The Sound of Music - Director's Cut: Fear and Loathing in Saltzburg. No it wasn't.
Whatever. I didn't last long with it, for so annoying were the von Trapp family (especially the little one) that they were marked for death by hit squads and hunted throughout the hills of Switzerland. And they were never heard from again. The end.
Now, while the von Trapps' favourite things are great - crisp apple strudel and schnitzel with noodles, you betcha - watching the film got me thinking about cricket, and cricket's place among my favourite things. For along with Jessica Alba, Boardwalk Empire, Anzac Day, the thoroughbred Super Impose, Barnbougle Dunes (a Tasmanian golf course), the WS Cox Plate (a horse race), drink holders in golf carts, Dennis Lillee, oysters, Darth Vader, Pulp Fiction and Coopers Pale Ale, cricket occupies several spots in my Top 50 Favourite Things.
Full postPCB warns Afghanistan against trying too hard to win
And other delights from around the cricket world
R Rajkumar
13-Dec-2013
BCCI objects to unilateral CSA decision to let India tour proceed
After having given it some careful thought, the BCCI has decided to go ahead and take exception to Cricket South Africa unilaterally giving the go-ahead to India's tour in the wake of Nelson Mandela's passing, according to sources.
After having given it some careful thought, the BCCI has decided to go ahead and take exception to Cricket South Africa unilaterally giving the go-ahead to India's tour in the wake of Nelson Mandela's passing, according to sources.
"Yet again, CSA has made a decision about the tour without consulting us," sputtered a spokesman for the Indian board after a meeting called to formulate a response to this fresh affront to its ego. "I'm sorry, but this effrontery will not stand."
When asked if they had a statement to make on the passing of Mr Mandela, the BCCI said, "Not only was Madiba's life a shining example of courage, resilience and integrity, he was a soaring beacon for democracy and known to be a great believer in the unifying power of sport and the discord-inducing power of appointing Haroon Lorgat as chief executive. Yep, that isn't going to go away just yet, guys."
Full postWhy England seem old despite being young
They are batting creakily when they should be thinking young and batting nervously
Alex Bowden
12-Dec-2013
People respond to the ageing process in different ways. One might acquiesce to a growing waistband, considering centimetres to be something that you continually accumulate throughout your life, like debt or pessimism. Another might react by going to the opposite extreme, attempting to recapture their youth through a relentlessly pursued fitness regime - even though the youth they are trying to recapture was most likely characterised by sloth and apathy.
Following two pretty woeful performances, some are suggesting that this England side is over the hill. They do appear wearied, but age is misleading here for they are actually younger than their Australian counterparts. In fact, very few of them are actually getting on in years. They just seem old.
With cricketers, we often mistake novelty for youth and familiarity for age. For example, Ravi Bopara is thought by many to be past it, even though he is only 28, while England are talking about investing in Boyd Rankin for the future, even though he's already 29. Their wicketkeeper, Matt Prior, currently looks a bit jaded, but is actually only 31, and this compares favourably with the surprisingly spry Brad Haddin, who is 36. At the rate they are currently being played, Prior could squeeze in another four or five Ashes series before retirement.
Full postEngland in crisis: experts offer their solutions
We canvassed the thoughts and suggestions of some of cricket's finest minds about England's Ashes nightmare
Alan Tyers
09-Dec-2013
Bob Willis: "Well, Charles, I suggest boiling them in oil, and if that doesn't work, chopping all their heads off and then boiling them in oil again just to make sure."
Rob Key: "That sounds delicious, maybe with a bit of chilli sauce on the side."
Sir Ian Botham: "I just don't understand what's going on out there. If they'd had five slips and three gullies in all the time, as I said they should, then none of this would have happened."
Full postWhy India must fail in South Africa
Your average Indian fan will be hoping for victory. But the average fan is a fool who knows nothing
Sidin Vadukut
06-Dec-2013
Enough of your Ashes brouhaha and hype and nonsense. Every single day when I log onto ESPNcricinfo it is Gabba this and WACA that and g'day mate and Vegemite… and what happens at the end of all that? Little more than batting collapses, profanity-shouting, individual and group urination, and recreational racism. Which other serious sport in the world, besides boxing, football, basketball, cycling, track and field, American football, field hockey, wrestling, badminton and Canadian local government would tolerate this level of dishonour, debauchery and decay?
Which is why many experts consider the 2013 Indian tour of South Africa the most important contest in cricket right now. The outcome of this tour will finally decide, beyond all doubt and speculation, the rightful owners of the title Best Cricketing Team In The World Right Now If You Ignore The Subcontinent Because Subcontinent Is Not Really Moan Whine Moan Fast Bowling Is The Best Everything Else Sucks Spin Bowling Is For Losers Nyah Nyah Moan Moan Oh My God A Bouncer I Got Excited And Now There Is A Steyn In My Pants.
Now many of you non-Indian readers of this website may be tempted to think that Indian fans are looking forward to a keen contest in South Africa that will hopefully culminate in a comprehensive victory for the Indian side.
Full post'English players will be drinking concrete milkshakes in Darwin'
Just what you wanted: more wretched Ashes sledging, but on Twitter
Alex Bowden
05-Dec-2013
It's still the Ashes. You might have noticed. We've been monitoring the players' Twitter feeds so that you don't have to endure their "banter". You're welcome.
This week's round-up features a whole two types of food that cannot be purchased at a well-known Portuguese-themed chicken outlet. It's a new record.
The Aussies
Not all Aussie cricketers have secured a win recently.
Full postNot all Aussie cricketers have secured a win recently.
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