'Dear stomach, you're bored, not hungry - so shut up'
Conversations with organs, and mind-reading with Kraigg Brathwaite, in this fortnight's Twitter round-up

Graeme Swann had close encounters with the feline kind • Getty Images
A lot of cricketers like to invite their followers to ask them questions. Obviously they get to pick which questions to answer, so you don't get any of the fence-sitting that characterises more formal interviews.
8. #AskABD Who do you think is a tough test team to beat at their own backyard. Australia, India or England? @amareshbeuria All 3 really
— AB de Villiers (@ABdeVilliers17) October 19, 2013
Hi @demi_L_15 Left pad on first #AskBouch #SSCricket
— mark boucher (@markb46) October 16, 2013
Chris Gayle knows his own mind.
Dear stomach, You're bored, not hungry - so shut up!
— Chris Gayle (@henrygayle) October 20, 2013
How's Tino Best's hashtag habit coming along? Has he managed to kick his addiction yet?
Time to hit the road again #jetlife #thankful #tinobest #windies #oneteamonegoal#bandofbrothers https://t.co/DqQhGjlQyg
— Tino95 (@tinobest) October 20, 2013
As a Test bowler, Graeme Swann is no stranger to personal battles. But this?
The tabby cat who is conducting a turf war against my two has just walked into my kitchen, stared me out then licked his nuts. What a cat!
— Graeme Swann (@Swannyg66) October 10, 2013
Nick Compton is hitting the heights.
Bloody altitude sickness!! All the way here to lie in bed drinking coca tea and take oxygen... The joys of the Peruvian Andes!
— Nick Compton (@thecompdog) October 11, 2013
I don't have haters .Only fans in DENIAL.~Tino Best
— Tino95 (@tinobest) October 12, 2013
Kemar's been away.
Great Day In Orlando! Shopping Isn't That Bad!
— Kemar Roach (@KemarAJR) October 21, 2013
I'll Tell You What, Sea World In Orlando Is Amazing! Big Up The Dolphins! Mad Show! #Amazing
— Kemar Roach (@KemarAJR) October 22, 2013
Kraigg appears to have come to believe that we can read his mind and he has therefore begun omitting anything that could be considered context, leaving us with a bizarre, minimalist expression of his experiences that tells us virtually nothing.
Last day
— Kraigg Brathwaite (@K_Brathwaite) October 12, 2013
Bangalore
— Kraigg Brathwaite (@K_Brathwaite) October 12, 2013
Knackered
— Kraigg Brathwaite (@K_Brathwaite) October 12, 2013
Cant wait
— Kraigg Brathwaite (@K_Brathwaite) October 12, 2013
Soon that time
— Kraigg Brathwaite (@K_Brathwaite) October 13, 2013
You are
— Kraigg Brathwaite (@K_Brathwaite) October 13, 2013
London
— Kraigg Brathwaite (@K_Brathwaite) October 14, 2013
Barbados tomorrow!!
— Kraigg Brathwaite (@K_Brathwaite) October 14, 2013
Barbados!!
— Kraigg Brathwaite (@K_Brathwaite) October 15, 2013
Knack
— Kraigg Brathwaite (@K_Brathwaite) October 16, 2013
Soon back to work
— Kraigg Brathwaite (@K_Brathwaite) October 18, 2013
Bored to max
— Kraigg Brathwaite (@K_Brathwaite) October 19, 2013
Tired....
— Kraigg Brathwaite (@K_Brathwaite) October 22, 2013
Early night
— Kraigg Brathwaite (@K_Brathwaite) October 23, 2013
Convinced
— Kraigg Brathwaite (@K_Brathwaite) October 23, 2013
Cricketers are fond of trite self-improvement quotes. Some quote notable historic persons, some quote politicians, some quote religious figures. Going through tough times at present, Sreesanth has his own guru.
The resistance that you fight in the gym & the resistance that you fight in life can only build a strong character. -Arnold Schwarzenegger"
— Sreesanth (@sreesanth36) October 13, 2013
A shocking revelation here. It would seem that sometimes cricketers go to Nando's and don't broadcast the fact on Twitter.
"@apb1986:@MattPrior13 Hi Matt can u confirm 2 my disbelieving cricket fanatic friend @WednesdayNav u were in Nando's Brighton earlier?"yep!
— Matt Prior (@MattPrior13) October 17, 2013
Alex Bowden blogs at King Cricket