'I'm so hungry I could eat my own spaghetti bolognese'

The very specific gripe
Mitchell Starc's having a go at observational humour.

We've all been there.

The omission
Martin Guptill didn't play against Pakistan.

Unfortunately not, Martin. Sport's precisely the bit you weren't involved with that day.

The footwear
And that wasn't the only bad news Guptill received this week.

May their soles rest in peace.

The positivity
Chamara Kapugedara isn't getting ahead of himself.

Remember that, everybody. Just because you're having fun today doesn't mean you aren't going to get dropped and break your jandals tomorrow.

The cook
They call Alastair Cook "Chef" for obvious reasons. Graeme Swann is not fighting him for the name.

Your jandal, you mean? Tough times.

The recommendation
Do you trust Darren Lehmann?

Do you trust the completely bald Darren Lehmann?

The eye-catching performance
Tim Bresnan reports on the England team's preparations.

Referring to anyone in particular?

Either Jade means "satin" or he's got a funny idea of what constitutes a boy band.

The momentum
AB de Villiers thinks South Africa have it this week.

What happens if you let go? Does everything stop? If you have to provide the force to keep something moving, there isn't much in the way of momentum?

Tino Best's modesty corner
How do you feel about Tino Best?

That doesn't leave people many options, Tino.

What's your philosophy?
Lonwabo Tsotsobe has nautical confidence.

But remember, sail adjustment is purely a last resort for those rare occasions when you can't adjust the direction of the wind.

And what's your philosophy?
Shaun Pollock shares even more from his bottomless pit of wisdom.

Or how about "a stomach to withstand trite, righteous drivel"? Also, does the brain not warrant a mention? No?