Flintoff, splint-off, not a toff
The results of our Andrew Flintoff limerick competition

Never before has a cricketer generated so many limericks... • PA Photos
'Oft injured, he rarely had the splint off,
But ten overs at Lord's,
Went through 'Stralia like swords.
And with five wickets in hand he did sprint off
Was one of the lads - not a toff.
Always bowled with hostility,
And with no lack of ability,
He was much in the same class as Gough.
Whose bouncers damn near took your head off
But with his bad knee
We'll just have to see
If his dancing is better than that Gough
Who went into bat with his pads off
Two fours and a six
Then the ball hit his sticks
So his next port of call was the beer trough
England's best allrounder since Both
They both like to sink,
A pint, so you'd think;
Twice before suggesting a drink-off
Whose career was a little on/off
Don't retire yet you wimp
Look how you bowled with that limp
Or we might have to resurrect Both
Whose captain said "Please take that splint off,
I don't care for your knee
We are seven for three.
And we'll need you to bat in a min't - Hoff"
Did a lap in the rain just to show-off
Round the ground he did go
In a pink pedalo
With two blondes and bottle of Smirnoff
Whose sledging was too naughty to print off
A choice word or three
Starts with 'f', 's' or 'c'
But that's all I can give you a hint of!
Will Luke is assistant editor of Cricinfo