Dhoni to receive anger management counselling from Anderson

Following an ugly incident in the first ODI in which he appeared to barge into young Bangladeshi debutant Mustafizur Rahman, MS Dhoni has been ordered to attend anger management sessions conducted by England bowler James Anderson.

The collision, which was so bad many Indian commentators and journalists were only able to view replays of it through one eye, occurred after the talismanic keeper attempted to scamper a quick single during the match in Dhaka. Anderson himself was involved alongside Ravi Jadeja in the notorious Pushgate saga of 2014, but has since become a reformed character, with many limited-overs batsmen across the globe and particularly those at this year's World Cup describing him as "a pussycat" and "entirely non-threatening". As such, he is seen as the perfect man to help the Indian captain prevent a repeat of last Thursday's shocking events.

Dhoni, who is known as "The Iceman" because of his love of the film Top Gun, is also renowned for his usually calm persona on the field. He rarely displays even a hint of irritation, despite having captained Ishant Sharma in hundreds of matches, but the clash with Mustafizur, in which the young pacer did little wrong other than stand right in the middle of the Indian captain's path like a human bollard refusing to move under any circumstances, has led some to question whether Dhoni is starting to lose his famous cool. Many observers have even queried Dhoni's explanation that he only led with his arm when running into the young quick in order to "minimise the impact"; one fan outside the ground suggested the reasoning was "like drinking more gin at midnight in order to minimise the impact of a hangover".

Despite his previously frosty relationship with the BCCI, Anderson is believed to be delighted at having been chosen for the role as Dhoni's "passivity guru". The swing king said ahead of England's recent series against West Indies that the fallout from the Pushgate saga had changed him as a bowler and person, a view backed up by data revealing he only snarled like a dog with a cat-shaped blister on its paw at Caribbean batsmen a mere 2.3 times an over. This was well down on his career average of 3.8 an over, which once saw him labelled "the most skilful grumbler in the world" by Alastair Cook (although many supporters felt Dale Steyn to be more effectively stroppy in matches away from friendly home conditions).

BCCI chiefs are rumoured to have already been in talks with their ECB counterparts about sending Dhoni to be placated at the National Cricket Performance Centre in Loughborough if the sessions with Anderson fail to bring the required results.

Dr Andy Flower, Head of Aggression Suppression at the facility, said that he was sure the World Cup-winning captain could be helped: "Here at Loughborough we specialise in removing any trace of aggressive intent from a player. Whether it be with regard to attitude, mood or technique, we have developed a series of drills which ensure any player leaving the centre has about as much life in them as a statue of a dodo.

"Sadly the present England side have completely ignored a lot of the hard work we do here, but we are nevertheless confident we can help out Mr Dhoni if required. We might show him a highlights reel of Misbah's finest dot balls or just make him lie in a darkened room listening to Michael Holding singing lullabies, but either way we'll certainly calm him down."