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February 16, 2012

World Cricket Podcast

The ugliest thing in cricket

Andy Zaltzman

Andy Zaltzman and Daniel Norcross talk about Pakistan's abject and deceitful performance in the UAE, Saeed Ajmal's beautiful hair, how World War Two ruined batting techniques, and which animal will make the best wicketkeeper

Download the podcast here (mp3, 29MB, right-click to save).

Andy Zaltzman is a stand-up comedian, a regular on the BBC Radio 4, and a writer

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Posted by Craig the Princess on (March 7, 2012, 20:49 GMT)

Actually his average was 33 (2 innings)

Posted by Craig b Kirsten 0 on (March 7, 2012, 20:48 GMT)

The best animal wicket keeper = Jack Russell, 54 tests, 153 catches, 12 stumpings.

One match superstars? Douglas Bader (First Class Average - 63 (1 innings)) , also 20 confirmed enemy aircraft.

Posted by Kouichi on (March 1, 2012, 22:18 GMT)

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Posted by David Allen on (February 17, 2012, 18:54 GMT)

You almost got it right when you commented that Pakistan were terrible, however records don't mean much because the rules (not the laws) have changed. Apparently it's now ok to chuck it which does add significant advantages and a slightly over doctored playing surface explains both the loss by England and abject batting by both sides or, could any other side in the world have done better on these pitches. Just sit back and watch Pakistan lose heavily everywhere else.

Posted by Graeme on (February 17, 2012, 14:58 GMT)

The best animal wicket keeper = the orang utan

Low to the ground (as all the best keepers are) bu able to spring up for high bouncing deliveries.

Big hands with a strong grip.

Long reach.

Naturally bouncy.

Bit quiet - but you could bring a chimp in for the appealing.

I reckon that the average orang utan could, with a few weeks training, e a better keeper than the chap currently weilding what appear to be frying pans in the Pakistan ODI side at the moment.

Posted by Umar Riaz on (February 17, 2012, 4:42 GMT)

Unsung Heros from Pakistan Basit Ali. One of the best batsman Pakistan has ever produced but ended his career with an avg of 26.

Muhammad Sami. B owls at 90mph but has taken only 84 wickets in 35 test with an avg of 52.

Posted by Emad Din on (February 17, 2012, 3:16 GMT)

I watched two minutes of the video and was shocked at the amount of bias in your analysis of the test series. You basically said Pakistan have no reason to celebrate the 3-0 whitewash of england because they faced the worst english batting performance of all time, and almost lost. You can't dismiss their performance as a fluke. They were outplayed, outwitted, and outclassed by the best spin attack in the world.

Posted by Captain Plasma on (February 17, 2012, 2:51 GMT)

By far, the animal which would make the best wicketkeeper is the sheep, particularly the breed Romney Marsh! When my village cricket team was at cricket practice in Australia in the 1970s a sheep wondered into the net and stood behind the wicket - we named him Romney Marsh . . . obviously!

Posted by Mazza on (February 16, 2012, 17:08 GMT)

Which animal makes the best keeper?? Was convinced Pakistan already had a mountain goat keeping for them...so the stump mic would indicate anyway...

Posted by Cricket on (February 16, 2012, 14:37 GMT)

Were you on holidays during the Test Match Series (when English were hammered) ?

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ABOUT THE AUTHOR

Andy Zaltzman
Andy Zaltzman was born in obscurity in 1974. He has been a sporadically-acclaimed stand-up comedian since 1999, and has appeared regularly on BBC Radio 4. He is currently one half of TimesOnline's hit satirical podcast The Bugle, alongside John Oliver. Zaltzman's love of cricket outshone his aptitude for the game by a humiliating margin. He once scored 6 in 75 minutes in an Under-15 match, and failed to hit a six between the ages of 9 and 23. He would have been ideally suited to Tests, had not a congenital defect left him unable to play the game to anything above genuine village standard. He writes the Confectionery Stall blog on Cricinfo.

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