'The urinal is the place to be!'

This week's Twitter round-up is bookended by two tales where prolonged spells of consistency have come to a sad end. One involves a board game, the other involves a restaurant. You've probably guessed that Nando's is involved in the latter, but how and who is the protagonist? So much intrigue. (ESPNcricinfo accepts no responsibility for the reader feeling a little bit underwhelmed once those questions have been answered.)

The winning streak
Graham Onions' perfect record has come to a sad end.

How often do you play? Once every three decades?

The complete lack of context
Nikita Miller has something he desperately wants to share with the world.

Thanks, Nikita.

The venue
Dale Steyn knows all the best nightspots.

The naturalist
The vocabulary of South Africa's Chris Morris doesn't extend to "nocturnal".

Hibernation was a good attempt, though. Almost exactly wrong, but at least based on similar concepts.

The exclamation mark
This feature will continue until everyone's as irritated by inappropriate exclamation-mark usage as I am. This may take years, which is fine - I can wait.

"Rajasthan Royals becomes first sporting club in the world to have its own line of smart devices," he exclaimed.

The film review
Stuart Broad reports.

Life with Kemar Roach
Preparation for the Champions Trophy seems to have brought Kemar down considerably.

He perks up a little at the prospect of travelling to Cardiff, but it isn't quite enough to turn things around.

However, once things click…

He's up and running.

And he's back down again.

And he's back up again.

It's hard to say how he's going to react to that.

Nando's Watch
Ross Taylor has an ominous question for Scott Styris.

Say that you are, even if you aren't. It's safer to conform.

The threat
But it isn't always so easy to toe the line, as Shaun Pollock reveals.

The change
And every now and again, it has been known for a cricketer to actually choose to go elsewhere. For example, MS Dhoni finally reached breaking point.

Advice for Nando's: start selling ginger tea immediately.