The streaker dilemma

Streakers have a tendency to display their bits and pieces at the most inappropriate times of a cricket match.

Streakers are invariably home side ‘supporters’ who disrobe and disrupt with equal measure, doing their team no favours in the process. Despite reports of recent poor crowd behaviour, the cricketing world is perhaps not yet ready for barbed wire borders on our boundaries. So what to do, to combat these naked invaders?

The solution clearly lies in organising this band of naturists, in order for all streaking to be conducted within the breaks of play.

Streakers will have to identify themselves to ground staff on arrival at the match and will be issued a ticket number in return. At the lunch break, the ground announcer will call out the streaker’s number who can then run rampant through the pitch (avoiding the square of course) and return peacefully to their seats at the conclusion of their performance.

Replays will be shown on the big screen in the ground, and the fully clothed members of the crowd will have a chance to vote, via in-seat-touchpads, on the streaker of their choice.

Problem solved. No more disruptions and hearty interval entertainment.