My dear old fruit

Apologies. It's taken rather longer than usual to get round to judging this (or should that be last?) week's competition. Can't think what's been going on in the meantime to distract me from such a critical task. But anyway, enough of the pleasantries. Let's dig in.

It was, to coin a predictably green-fingered phrase, a lean crop this week. But, for once, that's not (entirely) the fault of your entries. In my desperation to reach the ticket touts before they'd sold out of spares for The Oval, I abandoned everything and completely forgot to add the competition to the homepage. So if none of you have seen this hilarious picture before today, please direct all complaints to the England management.

Some of you, however, felt that invisibility should be no barrier to creativity. Take Shashi Srivastava, for instance. "Life without cricket is like bowling on a placid wicket, mate," he said, with no apparent reference to the large bowl of fruit depicted in this picture. "If only I wasn't married ..." mused a love-struck Usayd Hamid, clearly mistaking me for that well-known agony aunt, Dear Deirdre. "L@st longer in b3d," chuckled Merle G Rossi ... oh, hang on.

The eagle-eyed Adnan Yusuf noted that there were no sour grapes in England's fruit bowl, and decided that they must all have been given to the Australians instead. Funnily enough, Rob Travers spotted they'd bagged all the pears as well. Aiden Rose, however, felt that was unlikely, because their diet since Trent Bridge had consisted solely of humble pie. Cheap shots one and all, but forgivable in these once-in-a-lifetime circumstances.

Not everyone was so keen to starve the Aussies of the fruits of their labour. "These are much healthier than the jaffas we've been giving Matthew Hayden," sniggered Daniel Binns, while Mark Sellek urged the players to save some for John Buchanan, "because he's as fruity as they come!" Adrian Stabler, meanwhile, decided it wasn't just the coach who needed the Vitamin C. "These will stop the convicts getting scurvy," he gloated, "on their long trip back to Australia!"

Several of you, understandably, couldn't fail to spot the bunch of bananas balanced on Ashley Giles' head. "If I put these bananas on my head," suggested Laura Burnip, "it might distract Ricky Ponting ..." Fortunately, Laura provided us with a footnote as well. "NB: This caption only makes sense if you go by the opinion that Ponting resembles a monkey." Actually I always thought he looked like George W Bush, but there you go.

"I expected the King of Spain's crown to be slightly more elaborate," remarked Chris Cowan. "These pommes will go even more bananas when Ash brings back the Ashes," added Mike Saull. "I could get a hat-trick with three bananas," added John Loynes from Worcester. "Ashley Giles - King of Skin," said Paul Bowden. "The apple of Great Britain smiles at banana piles on Ashley Giles," sang a lyrical Angshuman Hazra. "Can you be King of a banana republic?" queried Nick Tellis, just before this particular well of inspiration ran dry.

Oh dear, it has been a long week. As Freddie Flintoff so memorably put it: "I'm struggling". So, here is my maverick pick of the week, courtesy of Sam Crompton of Perth:

Thanks once again for all your entries. Now, after all that fruit, here's something rather more meaty to get stuck into for next week's competition. Click here for the most shambolic guests ever to set foot in No. 10 Downing Street. What do you reckon they've got to say for themselves? Entries, as ever, to caption@cricinfo.com.