The Heavy Ball

'I'm convinced I have the most problematic life!'

Have some sympathy for cricketers, who have to worry about dinner, sponsors, defining coincidences and finding greater meaning in logograms

Alex Bowden
04-Jul-2013
Owais Shah tries to figure out if there will be more pizza for everyone if it's cut into eight slices instead of four  •  Getty Images

Owais Shah tries to figure out if there will be more pizza for everyone if it's cut into eight slices instead of four  •  Getty Images

In this week's Twitter round-up, we answer all the most pressing questions. How do you know when you've eaten enough sushi? What did Ricky Ponting bring to the dressing room? What does an ampersand remind you of? And is Owais Shah numerate?
The observation
Jason Krejza has spotted something.
Nice hash tag.
The business plan
Mitchell Marsh has had an idea.
"I wish I sold bandwagons."
@mitchmarsh235
Actually Mitch, one of the defining features of bandwagons is that a single one can accommodate many people. Just because there are a lot of people jumping on them doesn't mean that there's necessarily a huge market for such things.
The skill
Pat Cummins is a man of rare talent.
The minimum
More dinner-time slowness is described by Ravi Bopara.
Clearly Owais doesn't see Ravi and Rob as people.
The tunes
Graeme Swann has temporarily renounced Nineties indie music.
Arguably, he had more credibility when he was listening to Shed Seven.
The defence
Murali Kartik needs to ward something off.
What's the tongue doing? Is this a Brad Hogg reference?
The alarm call
MS Dhoni's an early riser.
If it was only enough time because you got up 15 minutes before the alarm, you should probably set it to go off earlier.
The retirement
What did Ricky Ponting bring to a dressing room? Let's ask his Tasmania team-mate, Tim Paine who has been dissecting the consequences of Ponting's retirement with other members of the side.
Small man. Big loss.
The coincidence
Darren Bravo wants to know the odds.
It's not a coincidence. It's just going back to the same place after a certain amount of time. Furthermore, the time of year is presumably largely dictated by the fixture list.
The everyday experience
Tim Bresnan risked IKEA.
But what did you get that you didn't want?
Life with Kemar Roach
The excitement NEVER STOPS.
You really don't.
What's your philosophy?
You'd think we'd have a decent handle on Shaun Pollock's philosophy by now, but he's never short of something to add.
We're judging you by your tweets, Shaun.
Nando's Watch
Vernon Philander was feeling adventurous and asked for restaurant suggestions.
No you won't.
YO! Sushi Watch
Andrew Flintoff is no longer a cricketer. He dines elsewhere.
Fortunately, he has a system.

Alex Bowden blogs at King Cricket