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England batsman Kevin Pietersen has admitted that the tumultuous events of the last few months over him quitting captaincy and the sacking of former coach Peter Moores had drained him mentally during the ongoing tour of the West Indies. In an interview to the Daily Mail, Pietersen opened up about the way he was treated as captain, saying he didn't always get what he wanted and the whole experience caused a lot of hurt to him and his family.
Pietersen failed to establish a proper working relationship with Moores and the rift between the two cost the coach his job. Pietersen, however, insisted that the team atmosphere has been sound all tour, despite the sudden personnel changes now with Andrew Strauss and Andy Flower stepping in as captain and interim coach.
"What happened in January (quitting from captaincy) drained me mentally and I know people have been watching me and talking about me throughout this tour," he told the paper. "It's been a heck of a tough time and I'm at the end of my tether now. Really and truly I can't wait to get home.
"I liked the way the guys played under me and the approach that we had, but I never had everything I wanted as England captain. That's the thing that gets me. My England captaincy was not the England captaincy I wanted, that's what will live with me for a long time.
"There was a lot of hurt for me and my family at the way it ended and a lot of what was written was unfounded, but the bad feelings don't linger. I wouldn't have done anything differently with the benefit of hindsight because I did everything by the book. Straussy got what I wanted but good luck to him because he's a top man. I know he'll make the most of it."
He added that he had made a conscious effort all tour to allow Strauss to make his own decisions and will perhaps offer advice during the Ashes this summer.
"I haven't offered much advice on this tour to Strauss nor have I been asked for it," Pietersen said. "It's been too close to the bone in terms of what happened in January and that has made it difficult for me to get involved in decisions.
'I haven't wanted to step on his toes. I'd rather let him get on with it and do what he needs to do. Maybe in the summer it will be time for me to voice my opinion a bit more but for now I'm keeping myself to myself."
He also insisted that he would never consider captaincy again. "It's not somewhere I want to go and dive into," he said. "After the way I was let down I just don't think I want to get involved in that again."