World Cup 2011 February 28, 2011

Why Tendulkar is bigger than Woods or Federer

I am going to go out on a journalistic limb and say that yesterday’s game in Bangalore was, without question, a decent cricket match
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I am going to go out on a journalistic limb and say that yesterday’s game in Bangalore was, without question, a decent cricket match. I am sorry if any readers take offence at that, but I am sticking with it. Even my grandfather enjoyed it, and not only has he never really been much of a cricket fan, and as a South African had no emotional affiliation to either side, but he has been dead for 30 years. That is a measure of how exciting this game was – adorned with cricketing brilliance from the start, and topped off with an exploding glacé cherry of a culmination eight hours later.

Even some of the more battle-hardened hacks in the press box seemed to quite enjoy it ‒ I even spotted a couple of half-smiles creeping onto journalistic faces, before the responsibilities of office returned ‒ and there can be no higher compliment for a game of cricket than that.

For me, this was a first experience of seeing India play at home, and of Sachin Tendulkar playing in front of his own people. I chose a good game with which to start. I can think of few, if any, experiences in sport to match watching Tendulkar succeed in a home game. Roger Federer may occupy a similar status of universally-acknowledged greatness within tennis, but I think it is fair to say that Switzerland is not quite as passionate about tennis as India is about cricket. If Federer were to simultaneously play tennis whilst hoarding gold and providing banking facilities for dubious dictators, perhaps the fervour of his support would match that for Sachin. But the Swiss population is unlikely ever to top the one billion mark.

Tiger Woods has always garnered more respect than affection amongst golf fans. And Sachin has, shall we say, been rather better behaved away from the sporting arena than Tiger. In the same way that Ludwig van Beethoven was rather better at writing catchy tunes for orchestras than, for example, Ravi Shastri has proved to be (so far, at least – rumours in the Indian media contingent suggest that the former all-rounder is working on a five-act rock opera about his double hundred at Sydney in January 1992, so perhaps we should reserve judgement on this matter).

I imagine Maradona or Pelé were supported with similar boisterousness when they played at home, perhaps even more so, but the nature of cricket as a team game played by individuals means that the batsman can become the focus of the crowd’s attention and support in a way that the footballer probably does not.

Perhaps the closest equivalent is watching British Chancellor of the Exchequer George Osborne deliver a speech at the Conservative Party conference. Perhaps not. (Although I do like to think that the seemingly-billion-strong roar that greets a Sachin hundred is exactly how the Tory conference’s reaction to the announcement of public sector cutbacks sounds inside Osborne’s own head.)

In any case, it was a magical experience and a privilege to witness. It was an innings of almost flawless perfection, the highlight of which was the successive sixes off the first balls of a new spell (a new over as it transpired) by Swann. As statements of intent go, this was a klaxon blast in the face for England’s best bowler that spelt out ‘I will hit you out of the attack’ in Morse code. Swann returned more effectively towards the end of the innings, and the outstanding and startlingly improved Bresnan restricted India to perhaps 20 fewer runs than they could have scored.

A quick but, I think, revealing statistic for you: India scored 32 more runs in boundaries than England did (50 more, if you include only overs 1 to 48, before England’s three late sixes). This suggests to me:

(a) The Indian running between the wickets was not fired with the urgency it might have been. No-one would accuse them of being the most athletic side in sporting history. I feel that Sehwag’s objection to quick singles is a philosophical one – why would the world have been given boundary ropes if you were not supposed to smash the ball over them?

(b) India failed to apply any pressure to England’s batting for the majority of their innings. For the most part, Strauss and Bell were able to milk the Indian bowlers like a heavily-sedated cow. Then, when England took the powerplay, India were forced to set tighter fields. The runs dried up, the pressure grew, the wickets fell. When the powerplay ended, the field spread again, England accelerated, and almost won the game. Read into that whatever you want.

(c) India are unlikely to win the 2011 Nobel Prize for Fielding. Or bowling.

For England, Strauss was magnificent, his high-speed judgement of length enabling to exert risk-free domination from the very start of the innings. Kevin Pietersen again suggested that his promotion to opener could be a major success, before being dismissed by a mixture of unlucky physics and Munaf Patel’s innate instinct for self-preservation. How quickly emotions can change in cricket – within the space of a fraction of a second, Munaf went from thinking that all his food would taste of white leather for the rest of his life, to celebrating a casual caught-and-bowled.

Bresnan continued his vastly impressive transformation into high-quality international cricketer with a sterling display in unhelpful conditions. Concerns remain over the other pace bowlers on wickets that have thus far been spongier than a pudding trolley in an old people’s home.

Both sides will have woken this morning with a pounding emotional hang-over, trying to piece together what happened to them the previous evening from the hazy memories seeping back to them. “Did we really do that?” they will have muttered to themselves. After a couple of alka seltzers and a restorative omelette for breakfast, both will reflect on a majestic sporting occasion which suggested that they could both win and lose any major match in this tournament.

Andy Zaltzman is a stand-up comedian, a regular on the BBC Radio 4, and a writer

Comments have now been closed for this article

  • KimKardashianPics on May 21, 2011, 13:06 GMT

    It is probaply true, but in wikipedia says:

    en.wikipedia.org/wiki/2012

  • Ronnie on March 9, 2011, 4:30 GMT

    "How quickly emotions can change in cricket – within the space of a fraction of a second, Munaf went from thinking that all his food would taste of white leather for the rest of his life, to celebrating a casual caught-and-bowled."

    hahahahahaa....absolutely hillariousss....i couldnt stop myself from laughingggg......rofl rofl......

  • sudipto on March 8, 2011, 18:11 GMT

    the fact that sachin is better than both federer and woods is unquestionable.records wise all three of them are pioneers in their respective fields and by far the best.but the fact is that unlike cricket which is so keenly followed by a billion plus population of india ,both tennis and golf are not followed in the same way in switzerland and USA respectively.moreover both federer and woods are not treated as demi gods in their respective countries.they are not scrutinised and pressurised as much as sachin.although it does not undermines their achievements and glory which is unparrelled in the history of their respective games but if one has to make a comparison then sachin stands out.

  • sudipto on March 8, 2011, 17:53 GMT

    the match was played with great spirit. both teams did not deserve to lose.if it was tendulkar showing the way for india it was the brilliance of strauss that almost took the game away from them.but as it turns out more often than not,the game of cricket is not over until it is actually over.an inspired bowling spell from zaheer towards the end brought india back into the game before some lusty blows by swann and shahzad ensured england don't lose the game.a great advertisement for one day cricket and a great start for the world cup

  • Eugene Rent on March 8, 2011, 4:30 GMT

    All you Sachin bashers out there, Just look at the facts... If you look at world cup games Sachin has scored 1982 runs in 38 world cup innings. second to him is Ponting with 1577 runs in 38 innings. He's got 5 hundreds, 13 fiftys (most of which are post 1996) and an average in world cups of 58 (way higher then his career avg of 45) so quit saying he cannot perform on the big stage.... its time you got your facts right. And by the way he played WI in 1996 and was run out as top scorer with 70 runs to his credit which got him the man of the match award. and that too with bowlers like Ambrose and Walsh.

    So Quit hounding the lil master (unless maybe if you can match his figures)

  • sid619 on March 7, 2011, 20:46 GMT

    @goodwin

    are you (Pa)kiwirocker in disguise..

  • Shan on March 3, 2011, 10:37 GMT

    @ goodwin

    So nobody cares sachin LOL, How many opening batsman took their teams like sachin did. This is not the first time he is going to face pace attack. Are you new to cricket?.

  • Akshay on March 2, 2011, 17:18 GMT

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  • AB on March 2, 2011, 9:41 GMT

    Ha,Ha For all the ficitious and different pen names used , we ALL know where the tiny, furiously jealous band of anti Tendulkar whingers are from !!

    Tendulkar the GOAT. Tendulkar has now officially gone past Bradman as the Greatest Batsman of all time.

  • Abhi on March 2, 2011, 8:59 GMT

    the pace attack of westindies wid one fast bowler :P

  • KimKardashianPics on May 21, 2011, 13:06 GMT

    It is probaply true, but in wikipedia says:

    en.wikipedia.org/wiki/2012

  • Ronnie on March 9, 2011, 4:30 GMT

    "How quickly emotions can change in cricket – within the space of a fraction of a second, Munaf went from thinking that all his food would taste of white leather for the rest of his life, to celebrating a casual caught-and-bowled."

    hahahahahaa....absolutely hillariousss....i couldnt stop myself from laughingggg......rofl rofl......

  • sudipto on March 8, 2011, 18:11 GMT

    the fact that sachin is better than both federer and woods is unquestionable.records wise all three of them are pioneers in their respective fields and by far the best.but the fact is that unlike cricket which is so keenly followed by a billion plus population of india ,both tennis and golf are not followed in the same way in switzerland and USA respectively.moreover both federer and woods are not treated as demi gods in their respective countries.they are not scrutinised and pressurised as much as sachin.although it does not undermines their achievements and glory which is unparrelled in the history of their respective games but if one has to make a comparison then sachin stands out.

  • sudipto on March 8, 2011, 17:53 GMT

    the match was played with great spirit. both teams did not deserve to lose.if it was tendulkar showing the way for india it was the brilliance of strauss that almost took the game away from them.but as it turns out more often than not,the game of cricket is not over until it is actually over.an inspired bowling spell from zaheer towards the end brought india back into the game before some lusty blows by swann and shahzad ensured england don't lose the game.a great advertisement for one day cricket and a great start for the world cup

  • Eugene Rent on March 8, 2011, 4:30 GMT

    All you Sachin bashers out there, Just look at the facts... If you look at world cup games Sachin has scored 1982 runs in 38 world cup innings. second to him is Ponting with 1577 runs in 38 innings. He's got 5 hundreds, 13 fiftys (most of which are post 1996) and an average in world cups of 58 (way higher then his career avg of 45) so quit saying he cannot perform on the big stage.... its time you got your facts right. And by the way he played WI in 1996 and was run out as top scorer with 70 runs to his credit which got him the man of the match award. and that too with bowlers like Ambrose and Walsh.

    So Quit hounding the lil master (unless maybe if you can match his figures)

  • sid619 on March 7, 2011, 20:46 GMT

    @goodwin

    are you (Pa)kiwirocker in disguise..

  • Shan on March 3, 2011, 10:37 GMT

    @ goodwin

    So nobody cares sachin LOL, How many opening batsman took their teams like sachin did. This is not the first time he is going to face pace attack. Are you new to cricket?.

  • Akshay on March 2, 2011, 17:18 GMT

    Hello guys ,check this site ....

    www.territoryneeds.com

    One stop fro all your property needsss

  • AB on March 2, 2011, 9:41 GMT

    Ha,Ha For all the ficitious and different pen names used , we ALL know where the tiny, furiously jealous band of anti Tendulkar whingers are from !!

    Tendulkar the GOAT. Tendulkar has now officially gone past Bradman as the Greatest Batsman of all time.

  • Abhi on March 2, 2011, 8:59 GMT

    the pace attack of westindies wid one fast bowler :P

  • goodwin on March 2, 2011, 6:50 GMT

    Tendulkar is a big hype. He is a very good batsman with great technics. He is not a winner and there are tons of people who are fooled by any headlines that has his name on it. Who the hell cares if you cannot be a winner? It will be very interesting to see how he is going to play against the pace attack from WI and SA.

  • Sudheer on March 1, 2011, 19:42 GMT

    @Kaka 'please stop writing articles about him since he can't perform at the highest stage' - open your eyes and check the world cup highest run scorers..

  • Waziq on March 1, 2011, 17:37 GMT

    @kaka. What kind of a comment was that. You have to remember that cricket is a team game and not an individual game. You just cant say that Lara, Kallis or Sachin is not a great player because they are not part of a World cup winning team. So do you mean that a Ramiz Raja or a Kaluvitarana are better that these people. So if possible try learning to appreciate the players without being biased.

    Wonderful article by the way. keep up the good work

  • Iftikhar Qamar on March 1, 2011, 16:42 GMT

    well to b honest i think article should be much more practical and realistic and i must say that Little Master will always remain little as he is not a match winner :( he never won a match for india did he ?? but i do appreciate his wasted 100s lolz which is alwayz scored on flat pitches or on home ground or against the weak sides same goes for Sehwag :)) i have never seen a player with no foot work at all and hez still in the side well match winner for India i must say Yuvraj,kohli and Raina arnt bad either ! they are really Match winners !!

  • p mitra on March 1, 2011, 14:47 GMT

    In future cricket will be divided into two periods: BT and AT- Before Tendulkar and After Tendulkar!!!

  • Kaka on March 1, 2011, 13:53 GMT

    Has tendulkar won a world cup yet. Until then he is just an ordinary player for me. A player cannot be great until he wins the biggest prize. So, please stop writing articles about him since he can't perform at the highest stage.

  • NALINWIJ on March 1, 2011, 13:23 GMT

    India is unlikely to win the nobel prize in bowling or fielding is a classic comment that sums up India. India's inability to get singles and allowing England to do so cost India a victory. Excellent analysis humorously presented. Sri Lanka was the weakest fielding side in the 80s and even Ranatunga was one of their better fielders but pre 1996 Sri Lanka embraced Australian coaching and became the best fielding side in Asia but I suppose when Greg Chappell coached India embraced nothing and their senior players still treat fielding as an after thought.

  • David on March 1, 2011, 11:49 GMT

    Just thought I'd mention ...

    1. SA thrashed WI. 2. WI thrashed Netherlands. 3. Netherlands almost beat England. 4. England and India tied.

    Put these together, and what do you get? SA a mile ahead of WI; WI a mile ahead of India & England; India & England a shade ahead of Netherlands!

    Are there going to be some very upset Indian fans in a few weeks?

  • Sachin28 on March 1, 2011, 10:14 GMT

    Zaltzman u r a legend, no offence nor defence, u a sporty neutral...Being a hardcore fan of sachin and one among those crores who has decided to stop watching cricket when sachin retires, I swear. But recently I was disappointed with sachin showing his face at jacques kallis(Last over of the 2nd or 3rd day in the final test match I guess), i would love to ask him, y he showed such a rough emotion which doesnt suit him and which he has never shown before?????

    And its heartbreaking to see the Indians still havin the habit of allowing the minnows to create records, Even Strauss wouldnt believed himself that he will play like this and such was a poor play of the toothless bowling of Indian bowlers.. poor show

  • gautam on March 1, 2011, 9:38 GMT

    Good article.

    But Andy, dont you think that was Strauss' day. He did bat very well, but it was one of his luckiest day which saved England. On the other hand, you did not mention about poor bowling performance from English bowlers. You cannt hide it by saying Sachin was unstopable. Of course, i agree with you "India are unlikely to win the 2011 Nobel Prize for Fielding. Or bowling".

  • Viveeel on March 1, 2011, 8:23 GMT

    @Article fantastic sums up most of most of match and dhoni incompetency as well, Dhoni's field placement is one of worst I have ever seen too defensive and has lots of scope for singles no slips of pacers, often you can see batsman score singles at same place over and over again. also Nowadays bowlers do not do any field placement for themselves which is quite odd as bowlers knows where is the most chance of bowl going if dhoni only ask them to bowl a specific type I certainly feel bowlers lack independence to bowl As a bowler myself I think bowlers knows best where his bowl can get hit not a captain. and specially dhoni's way keeping sachin, sehwag as boundaries will just tires them out by running around the field they are generally under 30 yard fielders. I hope India wins the world cup but it certainly will be a magic if they did with this approach.

  • Jez Bayes on March 1, 2011, 7:46 GMT

    Looking at all the comments, I wonder if AZ and Miles Jupp ought to do a standup tour of Asia?!

  • Ajmer Singh Bains on March 1, 2011, 4:22 GMT

    I think this is the first ever write I have met from Andy. I enjoyed it like a hungry man does a sumptuous breakfast. Zalts exalts!

    Tendulkar remains a mystery; the humblest billionaire that India or may be the planet has.

  • Santiago Raja on March 1, 2011, 4:12 GMT

    Good Article Andy,

    "India are unlikely to win the 2011 Nobel Prize for Fielding or bowling". That's a beauty mate!

    Cheers!!! Raja

  • Roy on March 1, 2011, 2:26 GMT

    I think that it has been a good experience for India - they should learn some lessons out of it. If they are not including R Ashwin, who may be even better than Harbhajan, for the next match, mostly they are going to be out in the 1st match in the knockout stage. I think they can do it at the expense of Yuvi.

  • Vikas Dahiya on February 28, 2011, 23:59 GMT

    Awesome!!!

    Though Viru is very good taking quick singles....but this world cup he is not showing that skill....may be because of his recent past injuries...But I like the below two most....

    "I feel that Sehwag’s objection to quick singles is a philosophical one – why would the world have been given boundary ropes if you were not supposed to smash the ball over them? "

    "India are unlikely to win the 2011 Nobel Prize for Fielding. Or bowling."

  • Pingissimus on February 28, 2011, 22:31 GMT

    Go out on a blogging limb and say this was a decent article. Bresnan really man of the match.

    Cute analysis of the run scoring patterns - I'd only add this is likely to be an IPL effect. Then I'd only add that Younis and Misbah scored almost entirely in 1s and 2s. No IPL for them. Wonder why.

  • sundeep on February 28, 2011, 21:10 GMT

    first zaltzman review i've read, loved it, hope u keep writing =-)

  • Ankur S on February 28, 2011, 19:18 GMT

    Nice article but I felt that you lost the focus of your article towards the end, but good job nevertheless.

  • Texmex on February 28, 2011, 18:50 GMT

    Nice article as always

    Your analysis on India not attacking until the powerplay when they were forced to bring in the field is spot on.

    Dhoni tends to be defensive and allows the game to meander

  • Ritesh P on February 28, 2011, 18:21 GMT

    As usual, a good post from Zaltzman. With Zaltzman in the crowd, Indians were themselves having a funny time in the field, perhaps to indicate that Zaltzman cannot be the only entertainer around. And when Zaltzman was thinking of worshipping Strauss and Co. on his blog for the next day, Indians came back to say, "Hey, did you forget that we did NOT lose the match after all?"

  • Ammit on February 28, 2011, 17:36 GMT

    Bravo! I think you can write on anything ranging from a dying Tasmanian devil to an Alien landing to watch Sachin's cover drive.

  • Nitish on February 28, 2011, 17:17 GMT

    Excellent piece of writing. I really loved the part on "Munaf".Great job Andy!! cheers

  • Sridhar Kalyan on February 28, 2011, 16:41 GMT

    Andy - loved your piece, especially about your grand-dad's reactions to the match; Munaf Patel normally walks off with the title for the laziest bum on the field, but yesterday he had serious competition even without Ashish Nehra in the playing XI or even as a sub. The bewildered look on his face as he sat squat on the track was due to the realization of the lost mantle!!

    Sehwag has started lasting 15 overs or so, these days; am sure you now understand what he meant by saying he plans to play a longer innings in this format of the game.

    Sachin will score his 57th ODI century in the 2015 version of this cup.

    Hail India.

  • Ashhar on February 28, 2011, 16:35 GMT

    Nice one Andy! Welcome to India!! While you have showered praises on Sachin and his demi-god status in India, it should be kept in mind that cricket is a team game. Individual brilliance from Sachin may not win him the world cup unless the entire team chips in with a valuable contribution. So Federer and Woods continue to revel in their mastery while our Sachin has to content with a loss or better still a tie!

  • amol shinde on February 28, 2011, 16:14 GMT

    gr8 job zaltman........that bit about grandpa was really hilarious....sachin is really GOD for Indians......watching him bat in India is really divine experience

  • venkat on February 28, 2011, 16:07 GMT

    I think Andy Zaltzman is a good model for journo's who come and moan about the sub continent. He has come here with no pre-concieved notions and has genuinely liked the experience. By the way Andy, have you had you first bout of Delhi Belly?

  • amol on February 28, 2011, 16:04 GMT

    gr8 job zaltman.......that grandpa bit is hilarious to say the least........

  • Prakash on February 28, 2011, 16:03 GMT

    I like the suggestion point B....Dhoni did the same in SA, when field came closer they applied pressure and took wickets. But it was due to power play ???? WHAT ON EARTH WAS HE DOING FOR 40 ODD OVERS WITH HIS FREAKISH FIELD PLACING ???

  • Karthik on February 28, 2011, 14:52 GMT

    Not your typical post Andy. But this wasn't a typical match either. Do look forward to you regular column based on you World Cup experience.

  • Karun on February 28, 2011, 14:49 GMT

    Thanks for highlighting the immense pressure put by 1 billion Indian supporters on Sachin and how he responds with sterling performance, at the age of 37, with the same hunger when he started at 15. That's why; many grandmothers (alive) adore him and christen their grandchildren as 'Sachin'. Traffic comes to a halt and people can walk safely on any roads, in India cities, including Delhi, when Sachin is batting.

  • Puttaraju on February 28, 2011, 14:44 GMT

    why would the world have been given boundary ropes if you were not supposed to smash the ball over them? :-)

  • Taimoor Hussain on February 28, 2011, 14:37 GMT

    Andy as-ever, a succinct and truly enchanting piece. Looking forward to more of the same throughout this world cup. :)

  • rameshb20 on February 28, 2011, 14:27 GMT

    Good 'un, as usual, Andy

  • Keshav on February 28, 2011, 14:07 GMT

    Another wonderfully well written and humorous article by Andy.. keep it coming sir!!

  • Madhu Sudan on February 28, 2011, 14:00 GMT

    This sums up the game for me:

    (b) India failed to apply any pressure to England’s batting for the majority of their innings. For the most part, Strauss and Bell were able to milk the Indian bowlers like a heavily-sedated cow. Then, when England took the powerplay, India were forced to set tighter fields. The runs dried up, the pressure grew, the wickets fell. When the powerplay ended, the field spread again, England accelerated, and almost won the game. Read into that whatever you want.

  • Srikanth on February 28, 2011, 13:53 GMT

    Wow..This zestful author of satire has written an almost normal article devoid of any irony..I hope he realises that just a cricket match happened and that Mahatma Gandhi was not assassinated in Bangalore!! What on earth made Mr. Zaltzman give up his usual style!!!! Come on! Reserve your 'normal approach' to events like the death of statesmen.. :-) But I agree with the author that this was really a fun match..I thought India would win easily...But if Chawla could be hit for SIX when he bowled round the wicket with his leg-spin, then this was some special match indeed!!! Well played England..Wake up India!!

  • Ajay on February 28, 2011, 13:34 GMT

    Good one Zaltzy! Sachin truly is bigger than Tiger... I'm surprised you didn't speak about Straussy?

  • SK on February 28, 2011, 13:22 GMT

    FANTASTIC post! I thoroughly enjoyed it!! Greetings from Sweden

  • T.Rajendran on February 28, 2011, 13:14 GMT

    I'm sure that the overwhelming Sachin received in India when batting good was nothing even remotely connected with the sport of cricket. You can confirm it by watching empty stands in this cricket loving country when other teams played.It's a blend of a kind of not fully evolved and understood Nationalim with the chance to chant collectively. You can't do this in any other places. you know the power of the ribs broking clubs held by the police men. And another point is both India and England are the vulgarly overrated teams in this event. A rational living creature cannot justify the proclamation that both the teams have good chances to win the cup.Their fielding is the worst two even after counting all associates.

  • P.Satish on February 28, 2011, 12:55 GMT

    Also how Akram has made a comeback to International Cricket disguised as Zaheer Khan. Zaheer's sheer brilliance of turning a game on it's head in a couple of overs is typically Akramesque.

  • Venkatesh on February 28, 2011, 12:40 GMT

    I always enjoy your writing. Keep writing. Softer than a pudding trolley in an old age home..hehehe.. I have to visit one and ask to see their pudding trolley.

  • jogesh99 on February 28, 2011, 12:31 GMT

    Andy,

    You are cricket's performing flea, but this match seems to have drained you too.

  • sandip on February 28, 2011, 12:16 GMT

    Your dead grandfather must be laughing his guts out reading your blog.Thanks for such a hilarious one. Hosni Mubarak must now be finding a lot of time to read them too.Thank god you were not selected to play for England!!Who'd have entertained us cricket fans if you had taken that catch in 1995 thrice :)

  • Abul Hasan on February 28, 2011, 12:13 GMT

    After watching the match, I was looking forward to reading Andy. To say the least he has not disappointed me. Carry on, I look forward to more of the same.

  • vinod on February 28, 2011, 12:10 GMT

    I still cant understand why dhoni tells fielders to stand so deep in the 30yard circle so that opposition can take easy singles. This was happened in the south africa also. This match was the 2nd best odi match that i had ever seen. (first was sa\aus 850+ runs) And i loved this article a lot.

  • Saket on February 28, 2011, 11:17 GMT

    Good one Andy!! Kudos to England for nearly pulling it off....I am not sure if India will win the cup with this bowling attack....their fielding only seems to improve on a relative basis!!

  • Raman on February 28, 2011, 11:12 GMT

    I loved this: "I feel that Sehwag’s objection to quick singles is a philosophical one – why would the world have been given boundary ropes if you were not supposed to smash the ball over them?"

  • chinmay boriwal on February 28, 2011, 10:59 GMT

    well written article this!yeah true that bresnan has been a revelation for england,but swann being dealt severely reminded the same for what happened here with warne and muralitharan. well talking of sachin,he will be enjoying this world cup rather than the hype been created around him,he is that sort! expect fireworks to continue from him.well done maestro...well done england...WELL DONE CRICKET!!!

  • Shyam on February 28, 2011, 10:55 GMT

    As funny as ever. Brilliant stuff Andy.

  • Brian on February 28, 2011, 10:27 GMT

    Nice one, Andy. Almost as good as the cricket.

  • Scott on February 28, 2011, 10:22 GMT

    Awesome read Mr Zaltsman. I thought Strauss and Sachin were both amazing yesterday - a real joy to watch them both.

  • Sakeb on February 28, 2011, 10:12 GMT

    "Strauss and Bell were able to milk the Indian bowlers like a heavily-sedated cow".

    beatiful

  • hemu on February 28, 2011, 10:01 GMT

    Absolutely Hillarious!!

    If Federer were to simultaneously play tennis whilst hoarding gold and providing banking facilities for dubious dictators, perhaps the fervour of his support would match that for Sachin. But the Swiss population is unlikely ever to top the one billion mark.

    Priceless!!

  • rarebie on February 28, 2011, 9:55 GMT

    This time it's Real Zaltz!

  • Zaltzmanesque on February 28, 2011, 9:14 GMT

    "...that they could both win and lose any major match in this tournament." Or tie.

  • Sridhar on February 28, 2011, 8:39 GMT

    Hi Andy, Not Zaltzy enough this article... but perhaps nothing can quite match the excitement of last nights game. Overall, i still think the match was as exciting only because of the ineptitude displayed by both teams in finishing a thing well begun!!

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  • Sridhar on February 28, 2011, 8:39 GMT

    Hi Andy, Not Zaltzy enough this article... but perhaps nothing can quite match the excitement of last nights game. Overall, i still think the match was as exciting only because of the ineptitude displayed by both teams in finishing a thing well begun!!

  • Zaltzmanesque on February 28, 2011, 9:14 GMT

    "...that they could both win and lose any major match in this tournament." Or tie.

  • rarebie on February 28, 2011, 9:55 GMT

    This time it's Real Zaltz!

  • hemu on February 28, 2011, 10:01 GMT

    Absolutely Hillarious!!

    If Federer were to simultaneously play tennis whilst hoarding gold and providing banking facilities for dubious dictators, perhaps the fervour of his support would match that for Sachin. But the Swiss population is unlikely ever to top the one billion mark.

    Priceless!!

  • Sakeb on February 28, 2011, 10:12 GMT

    "Strauss and Bell were able to milk the Indian bowlers like a heavily-sedated cow".

    beatiful

  • Scott on February 28, 2011, 10:22 GMT

    Awesome read Mr Zaltsman. I thought Strauss and Sachin were both amazing yesterday - a real joy to watch them both.

  • Brian on February 28, 2011, 10:27 GMT

    Nice one, Andy. Almost as good as the cricket.

  • Shyam on February 28, 2011, 10:55 GMT

    As funny as ever. Brilliant stuff Andy.

  • chinmay boriwal on February 28, 2011, 10:59 GMT

    well written article this!yeah true that bresnan has been a revelation for england,but swann being dealt severely reminded the same for what happened here with warne and muralitharan. well talking of sachin,he will be enjoying this world cup rather than the hype been created around him,he is that sort! expect fireworks to continue from him.well done maestro...well done england...WELL DONE CRICKET!!!

  • Raman on February 28, 2011, 11:12 GMT

    I loved this: "I feel that Sehwag’s objection to quick singles is a philosophical one – why would the world have been given boundary ropes if you were not supposed to smash the ball over them?"