The week on Twitter March 14, 2013

'I think Hughesy has something wrong with his bum'

Expert physiological analysis and more in this week's Twitter round-up

No prizes for guessing the focus of this week's Twitter round-up, and as ever, the nature of the foremost microblogging site means that we will be tackling the matter in great depth. We won't just be looking at the rights and wrongs of Australia's decision to suspend four players, the discussion will also lead us to answer questions about culture, contentment and maturity.

The punishment
Andrew Flintoff gives the English view on this week's events.

"Amazing 4 Aussie players banned for not doing homework , I thought letting them play in the next test would be punishment enough #3-0india"
@flintoff11

The wishful thinking
David Warner feels that he is expressing the feelings of many people.

"Think the homework saga is getting a little old now."
@davidwarner31

Nice try, Dave. But you're wrong.

The turnaround
Last week Matthew Hayden was sitting in an airport, smugly contemplating how wonderful his life was. But that was before four Australian players were dropped for crimes against bureaucracy.

"Morning all. Sitting in Airport Lounge in Dubai returning to India ahead of Test. I am saddened over the last few days in Aus Cric History"
@HaydosTweets

The contrast is stark. Airport philosophy is a dangerous game.

The comfort zone
Is the problem that recognition, fame and fortune are coming too easily to Australian players these days? Let's get the view of Pat Cummins. Are young Aussie cricketers spoilt? Are they perhaps too comfortable?

"In Perth for a few days. Love it here, it's like a 4th home to me."
@93Cummins

The grown-up
Accusations of back chat and "giving attitude", incomplete homework, and a stroppy vice-captain who says he might decide not to play anymore (a sentiment that was in no way related to the fact that he'd just been told off). It's hard to avoid the feeling that Australia's cricketers are maybe just a tad juvenile.

Can David Warner bring a bit of maturity to the squad?

"I think Hughsy has something wrong with his bum!! He walking funny, #mythoughts he has grapes."
@davidwarner31

Guess that's a no.

The older grown-up
It's not like the good old days when strong, serious-minded men like Shane Warne represented Australia.

"Try saying "I like cops" without your lips touching......"
@warne888

The actual grown-ups
But what is maturity really all about? Well, firstly it's about finding yourself irritated by seemingly trivial things. For example, Glenn McGrath has been admirably frustrated with the human race this week.

"Why do people stand so close to the baggage carousel at the airport?? Stay back till your bag is there, then walk forward and collect it!!"
@glennmcgrath11

Glenn's right on the money there. And why does everyone rush towards the check-in desk, even when it's not their row being called? You've got allocated seats and the plane's not going to leave without you.

Anyway, a second way to show maturity is to react negatively to any form of change, like David Hussey.

"Not entirely sure I like the new sized @theage newspaper. It was an art to learn how to fold and read and an art well worth learning!"
@DavidHussey29

This is what Australia are missing: general tetchiness and a deep-seated fear of change. This is what they need to instil.

Tino Best's modesty corner
Why is Tino here?

"I'm not here to impress you ,I'm here to express who I am #tino95"
@tinobest

And he's achieved that via a hashtag.

Chris Gayle's modesty corner
Is Chris Gayle jealous of anyone?

"I'm jealous of my parents. I'll never have a kid as cool as theirs."
@henrygayle

Smashwatch
Nottinghamshire's Riki Wessels is venturing into new territory.

"Just smashed a @YOSushi #rolloingdownhills"
@RikiWessels

What is this depravity?

Nando's Watch
Wessels' team-mate Alex Hales expresses all of our feelings regarding that.

"Properly missed nandos"
@AlexHales1

Alex Bowden blogs at King Cricket

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