© A Bellyful of Dreams Entertainment
Dada, Dadi, the Prince of Kolkata, Maharaj, Lord Snooty, God of the Off side, Cancer (this one is reserved only for those who really loved him)
An abrasive, regal legend who changed the way India played cricket; or at least he got them winning. Along the way he divided a rapt nation (luckily, only on days ending in "y"), rubbed up almost everyone he met outside Bengal - particularly Aussies - the wrong way, and was as useful against the short ball as chopsticks for soup.
Any Australian city: he has had a habit of riling those likeable and difficult-to-rile folks. Steve Waugh thought he was a tardy tosser, Greg Chappell wasn't keen on him either, and John Buchanan thinks so highly of his leadership he wanted three men to replace him.
Refuse to carry drinks as 12th man in one of his first series, thus first cementing his regal, sleeves-firmly-buttoned-down reputation? Dada himself denies it, terming it the "biggest lie", but what if he did? Some men are born to lead, not serve.
"Like having Prince Charles on your side…" Er, yes, what with the same big ears, the height, the skin tone, that clipped, marble-in-mouth accent, and the legendary off-side play; the only difference, of course, is that Ganguly never had to wait so long to lead.
Skilled anywhere really, just as long as it's not between third man and mid-off on the off side and long leg and mid-on on the on side.
A strip joint. Or, given the bare-chest and bling, a strip joint owned by 50 Cent.
A Pakistani wedding, and so never turned up on time.
Roving ambassador for ensuring healthy over-rates in world cricket
That spread by the British press circa 2002: that he owned a palace with over 50 rooms, and about a million cars. For your information, boys, his abode merely has 22 rooms.
That spread by us, here, that Shah Rukh Khan's next production will be a Rs 100 million biopic of the life and times of Sourav Chandidas Ganguly, starring SRK as Dada and Gene Hackman as Greg Chappell.
Osman Samiuddin is Pakistan editor of Cricinfo