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Should county cricket be allowed to monopolise UK sports pages?
How will sports like football survive if this madness is allowed to continue?
Alex Bowden
02-Oct-2014
There is a growing feeling that county cricket is becoming too dominant within British sport. Of particular concern is the way the first-class season is expanding, denying less popular sports the media coverage that might help sustain them.
For example, where September once marked the start of the football season, the likes of Manchester City, Liverpool and Chelsea now struggle to get on the back pages as they are effectively competing for attention with the might of the County Championship - a battle they simply cannot win. Even worse, many local newspapers - and indeed a number of nationals - do not send reporters to cover Premier League matches as they are all otherwise engaged at the County Ground in Derby or at New Road in Worcester.
It would be one thing if it were just the match reportage itself, but the unstoppable circus of the County Championship also brings with it a whole tranche of stories from beyond the boundary. Potential transfers are endlessly debated in columns and on TV, while certain commercial radio stations appear to feature little else. Tune in at any time of day or night and you're likely to catch Aftab Habib or Ed Giddins ranting about why Glamorgan were wrong to sign James Kettleborough.
Full postRyder Cup '14: Mankaddy Madness
Golf and cricket come together in a new game where European cricketers are pitted against the rest of the world
James Marsh
29-Sep-2014
As the life of a professional sportsman goes, it was a pretty tough weekend for cricketers, who had to choose between trying out the newly released FIFA 15 and watching the Ryder Cup. Golf or FIFA? FIFA or Golf? For the average player this is like asking them to choose which leg to keep, and a distraught Alex Hales even took to Twitter to express his horror at this very unique Sophie's choice.
Fortunately cricketers' twin loves of computer games and golf fantasies have been combined in a new title called Ryder Cup '14: Mankaddy Madness, in which European Cricketers battle it out against the Rest of the World for the coveted trophy. Here's how the final day singles panned out when I was lucky enough to be sent a preview copy. The level of realism is quite astonishing:
Stuart Broad v Yuvraj Singh, Europe win 3&2
After awarding himself an eagle for the first seven holes despite video evidence suggesting he had, in fact, ricocheted every drive off a tree into the hands of a steward, Broad is well placed. The match remains tight, however, until the closing stages, when Yuvi's disappointing run of 6, 6, 6, 6, 6, 6 means the controversial England quick comes out on top. He then drives a buggy into a bunker after refusing to walk back to the clubhouse.
Full postAfter awarding himself an eagle for the first seven holes despite video evidence suggesting he had, in fact, ricocheted every drive off a tree into the hands of a steward, Broad is well placed. The match remains tight, however, until the closing stages, when Yuvi's disappointing run of 6, 6, 6, 6, 6, 6 means the controversial England quick comes out on top. He then drives a buggy into a bunker after refusing to walk back to the clubhouse.
Mahendra Singh Dhoni's food journal
In the wake of Biryanigate, we look at the Indian captain's history of food-related tantrums
Sidin Vadukut
26-Sep-2014
Recently the cricket world was struck dumb by the news that India captain MS Dhoni had abruptly pulled the entire Chennai Super Kings squad from a hotel in Hyderabad and moved them to another hostelry establishment. Why? Because the original hotel had refused to let Dhoni partake of homemade biryani - a rich rice-and-meat dish perfected over centuries of cultural intermingling in India - dispatched to the team by the Ambati Rayudu household.
However, as Dhoni left the hotel in a precipitous huff, the talismanic wicketkeeper-batsman made a common error. He forgot to check his hotel room thoroughly before checking out.
Dear readers, how many times have we all left a hotel room, settled our bills, lied about minibar usage, hopped into a taxi, arrived at the airport, opened our luggage to make sure both table lamps from the hotel room are undamaged, only to suddenly realise that we left our mobile charger / umbrella / raincoat / passport / water bottle / leather restraining equipment / Johnson uncle behind in the room?
Full post'Beer, beer, beer, bed'
From Wicked to the philosophical in the latest Twitter round-up
Alex Bowden
25-Sep-2014
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Training, eating, sleeping, dreaming and complaining about air travel - that's the life of a cricketer, and thanks to the growing popularity of Twitter we now get to share every minute of it with them.
But if Twitter makes it easier for the public to make fun of cricketers, here's a rare moment where a cricketer appears to be making fun of the public. Post-modern social media sports satire moment of the week isn't exactly hotly contested, so Trent Boult walks away with the inaugural/final award.
Full postKolpaks call for referendum
Plus, tasty Champions League snippets you may have missed
R Rajkumar
23-Sep-2014
Kolpaks call for referendum
After having narrowly avoided losing Scotland, fears in London are that other constituents of the UK will now similarly call for secession. Indeed, there are already rumours of discontent brewing among the Welsh, Northern Irish, and Kolpaks.
After having narrowly avoided losing Scotland, fears in London are that other constituents of the UK will now similarly call for secession. Indeed, there are already rumours of discontent brewing among the Welsh, Northern Irish, and Kolpaks.
The Kolpaks, in particular, have been especially restless in light of the recent incident involving Ashwell Prince. "Princegate is just the latest in a string of incidents that has seen Kolpak players abused and marginalised by mainstream England cricketing culture over the years," said Kevin Pietersen from atop a soapbox in Hyde Park. "It's high time we decided whether or not it's worth staying on in the face of such ill treatment or break away to become independent agents in the IPL era. It's time we put it to a vote."
The ECB for its part is expected to go on an all-out charm offensive to persuade voters that Kolpak players are better off staying with England. "We need to recognise that Kolpak players are valuable contributors to our society and culture," said Giles Clarke, "and that without them, our national team just wouldn't be the same."
Full postYorkshire's finest react to Championship win
In which we imagine how legendary Yorkies might be responding to the County Championship triumph (it's all made-up, tha knows…)
Alan Tyers
22-Sep-2014
Alan Bennett
"We used to come and watch the cricket, mam and me, but we never had anything so fancy as a County Championship title. I mentioned it to Tim Bresnan the other day when were in the refectory at Debenhams, the slow, sad strangeness of it all, being on top of a table, rather like a discarded Bath Oliver left too long without being dunked in a cup of tea. Poor Tim got quite upset about the thought of an uneaten biscuit, but it all seemed to turn out all right in the end, as these things sometimes do."
"We used to come and watch the cricket, mam and me, but we never had anything so fancy as a County Championship title. I mentioned it to Tim Bresnan the other day when were in the refectory at Debenhams, the slow, sad strangeness of it all, being on top of a table, rather like a discarded Bath Oliver left too long without being dunked in a cup of tea. Poor Tim got quite upset about the thought of an uneaten biscuit, but it all seemed to turn out all right in the end, as these things sometimes do."
Geoffrey Boycott
"We might have finished on top of the table but have we got a No. 1 record at the top of the charts like young Katy Perry? Very good player, although how she would have got on against Fred Trueman, I'm not so sure. I can't see Katy being too comfortable on covered wickets."
"We might have finished on top of the table but have we got a No. 1 record at the top of the charts like young Katy Perry? Very good player, although how she would have got on against Fred Trueman, I'm not so sure. I can't see Katy being too comfortable on covered wickets."
Brian Close
"Soft jessies, carrying that trophy around over their heads. I would hit myself in the face repeatedly with the trophy every morning until I was bleeding, but you never heard me complain. It toughened me up."
Full post"Soft jessies, carrying that trophy around over their heads. I would hit myself in the face repeatedly with the trophy every morning until I was bleeding, but you never heard me complain. It toughened me up."
Five gadgets cricket needs
The Afridi Mindmapper comes to Misbah's rescue
James Marsh
19-Sep-2014
Thirty-nine degrees. Thirty-seven degrees. Forty-one degrees. When you're having your action tested by the ICC, you ideally don't want the results to come back sounding like the daily weather forecast for Dubai. Such was the fate that befell Saeed Ajmal last week, however, and although the list of bendy-jointed, flexy-elbowed tweaker felons has been growing faster than you can say "Long sleeves in this heat?", the Pakistan offspinner is such an iconic and loved player, the news he suffers from an acute angle problem caused quite a shock.
Still, alongside this bombshell, the ICC also hinted at an exciting technological development to help both Ajmal and cricket as a whole. There was inevitably initial speculation this meant Billy Bowden had at last worked out how to turn on the TV in the third umpire's room, but the truth transpired to be even more groundbreaking: the introduction of an electronic tracking sensor to be fitted to bowlers' arms above and below the elbow to monitor whether their delivery flex is within the permitted limit. The same equipment is apparently also used to record data from car crashes, which should make it particularly accurate the next time Ajmal bowls at English batsmen on the subcontinent.
This is a welcome and exciting move from the ICC, but if arch-techophobe N Srinivasan is now leading cricket into a brave new era of scientific innovation, here are five more gadgets and gizmos that could additionally be introduced to improve the game:
Full postHow to discipline a player ECB-style
Change the structure of the universe if you must to prove a point to an errant player
Alex Bowden
18-Sep-2014
Dissatisfied with Yorkshire captain Andrew Gale's two-match ban, the ECB lodged a formal complaint with its own Cricket Discipline Committee and instructed him to stay out of his own side's County Championship celebrations for good measure. This is the disciplinary panel hearing that followed.
A bland, featureless conference room. Gale sits with his lawyer on one side of a table. On the opposite side sit three ECB employees: the chairman of the Cricket Discipline Committee, a lawyer, and a spokesman. Kneeling down behind a desk a short distance away is ECB chairman, Giles Clarke. Gale cannot see him.
Chairman: Before we start, can I get you anything? Tea, coffee, water?
Full postFletcher learns cliché to talk to Shastri
All the vital cricket news of the recent past that you didn't even realise you had missed
R Rajkumar
15-Sep-2014
How would independence affect cricket in Scotland?
One of the more underrated, but no-less important what-if scenarios swirling around the upcoming Scottish referendum for independence is how the game of cricket will be affected by the outcome of the vote.
One of the more underrated, but no-less important what-if scenarios swirling around the upcoming Scottish referendum for independence is how the game of cricket will be affected by the outcome of the vote.
This intrepid reporter took to the streets to put the question to the Scottish people, and the following are some of the more meaningful responses received from the average Scottish Joe on the street:
"You having a giggle? Insects have ****-all to do with our independence. Or are you insinuating that nobody cares, hence the sound of crickets? Your idea of a joke then, is it? Well, we'll see who's laughing come September 18. Hey, where do you think you're going? Come back here ye wee radge ****!"
Kentigern Mackendrick, real estate developer, publican
Full postKentigern Mackendrick, real estate developer, publican
How clean is your bowling action?
Confused about your degree of straightening? Here's a ready reckoner
Sidin Vadukut
12-Sep-2014
Subsequent to the bombshell news that Saeed Ajmal's bowling action has been declared illegal by the ICC, cricket fans all over the world have been beset by numerous technical questions. For instance:
1. Is the rest of Saeed Ajmal legal? Why? Why not? What about his hair?
2. If Ajmal has exceeded 15 degrees in Centigrade, how many degrees did he exceed in Fahrenheit? In Kelvin? Explain with examples. (seven marks)
2. If Ajmal has exceeded 15 degrees in Centigrade, how many degrees did he exceed in Fahrenheit? In Kelvin? Explain with examples. (seven marks)
No wonder then that my email inbox is inundated with messages from cricket fans who all sound extremely frustrated and confused. One Ajmal Shahzad from Karachi wrote:
Full post