Needed a break due to emotional stress - Smith

An emotional Graeme Smith has apologised to fans for not explaining why he wasn't with the South African team upon its return from the World Cup. Smith arrived in South Africa only on Saturday, and said he needed a break due to the "emotional stress" he experienced in the aftermath of South Africa's dispiriting quarter-final exit.

"I was feeling incredibly emotional at the time," Smith read from prepared statement in Johannesburg. "Prior to the World Cup I had asked permission to go on to Ireland to attend to a personal matter. At the time I had faced a full media schedule and felt that signalled the end of the campaign. What I did not take into account was the public's reaction."

Smith went to Ireland to propose to Morgan Deane, who is now his fiancée and then travelled to India for the fourth season of the IPL, where he was part of the Pune Warriors squad. South African fans reacted angrily to his no-show, some describing it as cowardly following his last assignment as ODI captain. He also stopped interacting with the public on social networking site, Twitter, that Cricket South Africa has encouraged its players to sign up on and use.

Smith said his no-show was caused by anxiety and that he needed some time out. "The emotional stress was something that I hadn't been through before in my career," Smith said. "I felt it best to take a break from being stupid and saying stupid things. The fans have a first-hand line from their phone to my phone so I just wanted a break."

Smith said the World Cup campaign had exhausted him mentally, particularly because of the high expectation placed on the team. South Africa took what was believed to be their strongest squad into the tournament but were forced to exit at the quarter-final stage after a 49-run loss to New Zealand. South Africa failed to chase 222 in Dhaka, a performance that led to them being relabelled as chokers. It's a term that has raised much controversy in South Africa and one that continues to haunt the national side.

"I am still convinced that we adopted the right strategy in deciding to use three spinners in addition to two strike pace bowlers. This meant that all of our lower order had to bat one place too high," Smith said. He did not make excuses for his team's batting and admitted that the fault was with the top order, that, he said, "did not bat as expected and it is something we, myself included, need to work hard on."

Smith has been through a patch of poor form in recent months; he notched up a top score of 45 in seven matches at the World Cup. In 12 ODIs this year, he has averaged 28.25, substantially less than his career average of 39.25. His Test average has also slipped, to 35.87 in five Tests in the 2010-11 season, compared to 49.71 over his career.

"I admit that my own form has not been what I had hoped it would be of late," he said, admitting that without strong performances with the bat, he will struggle to the formidable leader he once was. "Nothing that I say in the next few weeks is going to be worthwhile unless I can back it up with performance."

Smith has battled a knee injury since the IPL and said he hopes to develop a personal programme, with the new coach, who will be appointed on Monday, in order to make a full recovery. It appears that most of the healing has to happen in the mind, with Smith saying he would like to rediscover the joys of playing cricket. "The last two to three months have been the toughest of my career. I want to get back to enjoying my cricket again." Without the responsibility of captaining in the shorter formats of the game, form is something Smith can concentrate on. He remains the country's Test captain, despite speculation that he would step down at Sunday's press conference.

While Smith has used his time away to refresh his mindset and sharpen his physique (he looked distinctly slimmer than he has in a long time), he hopes the rest of the World Cup squad have also been able to get over their calamitous exit. "Time is a good healer and it gives you perspective. It's easy to be emotional at the time.

"There are a lot of exciting times ahead for us with the appointment of the new coach and ODI captain. We did a lot of work in the off season on our team culture. Ultimately, it's always about the cricket and it always has been."

AB de Villiers is expected to succeed Smith as the ODI captain. South Africa take on Australia and Sri Lanka in their home season this year.