Alex Bowden

'Everybody wants the cheese, but they're not prepared to get stuck in the trap'

'Any advice on how you get a bat out of the house?'

'My dates confirm to drink rum'

'If you don't have a strip club at home, you ain't a player'

'Happy birthday to the world's best-looking bald man'

'This woman almost get run over looking at my car!'

'We're receiving reports of Aussies in trouble'

'When did someone transport the Nagpur wicket to Lord's?'

'Either England or Australia'

'I'd pay good money to hear him read 50 Shades of Grey'

'About to pare a pair of pears'

'Well, that escalated quickly!'

'One giraffe doesn't make a summer'

'Yes, I have always had a massive chin'

When KP walked into a tree

What's the first thing you do when you win a World Cup semi?

'Fancy a game in Japan on the way home?'

2019 World Cup format set in stone, but maybe not

'I don't care about your protein pancakes'

Jason Holder is in charge