The Surfer

It didn't quite go to plan. Vance bowled a series of no-balls - only one of his first 17 were legitimate - and ended up conceding 77 runs in the over. As the former New Zealand batsman John Morrison remembers "Bert wasn't the best option, in hindsight. I was the coach then, and we were trying to lure Canterbury into a close chase for runs which they'd given up on. It ended up being his main claim to fame, unfortunately."

This is now a state-of-the-art cock-up, so let's not rule out any theories at this stage. My own suspicion is that the software has become sentient and is now actively working to sabotage the England one-day cricket side. It's a small start, admittedly - but give it time and it'll become Skynet.

As he watched from afar, Pakistani cricket was plunged into darkness by the spot-fixing of captain Salman Butt and fast bowlers Mohammad Asif and Mohammad Amir. In the aftermath, the national side turned to Misbah's calming influence. His first match as captain was also his Test recall. "I realised it was time to take responsibility," said Misbah. "You have to stand up, show the world that you are a good cricketing nation, not only with your performances, but also your conduct and behaviour. You can still be professional, you can still amaze people and fans can enjoy your cricket. That was the challenge at that time."

"I never enjoyed cricket after Tom died in the way I had before," Hamilton-Brown said. "Nowhere near as much. I can't answer why. I only know that I didn't enjoy cricket in the same way."

It was a time of bitterness and anger too at the rough card life has dealt him. "I would sit in the nights and wonder 'how the hell did I get myself into this position! How I have f**ked up'." Sinclair wasn't mentally ready for such a severe slide. Depression was gnawing the corners of his mind and he knew somehow he had to avoid stewing in self-pity. Putting himself out there on the radio like that to listeners nationwide was one such thing. "It was funny actually. A caller suggested I should become a drain cleaner, someone else said curator." He hoped something would open a door for him.

England's over-reliance on the numbers has become a theme in the coverage of the team, particularly among ex-players. You can hear it when they bemoan, among other things, England's reluctance to bowl yorkers at the stumps. That's a tactic that has worked for years, one that has been honed by hard experience. But England's analysis has told them that slow bouncers and full balls sent wide of off-stump are harder to score off. The thing is, in an age when all teams are using computer analysis, a tactic isn't good or bad because it looks that way, or because it is different to what has been done before. It is simply good if it works and bad if it doesn't.

But even Thorpe would struggle to match the majestic deeds of 12-year-old Williamson. Williamson led Bay of Plenty Coastlands to the Northern Districts under-14 title last week in Gisborne. He amassed an incredible 420 runs in just four visits to the batting crease - pummelling unbeaten Bay of Plenty's opposition with scores of 101, 128no, 100no and 91no.

Thorpe's former test bat had been sitting around virtually unused for almost two years before Williamson picked it up. Aldridge, father of Northern Districts allrounder Graeme, got the bat from Mount Maunganui's Jim Irwin. Irwin had been given it by Ireland international and Surrey-contracted seamer Mark Patterson, who played for Mount two years ago. "Mark got the bat off Thorpe (his Surrey teammate) when England were out here at the beginning of last year and gave it to Jimmy before he left,'' Aldridge said. "I was doing some work for Jimmy and he asked me if I knew anyone who might want it. Kane sprang instantly to mind.''

But the problems run deeper than Peter Moores and Paul Downton. Our stock of talent is just not strong enough. Why is that the case? We have all the facilities, the coaches, the player performance pathways and academy squads in place but for some reason we can't produce fast bowlers or spinners. We are pretty much the only team in the world that does not have a genuine fast bowler. Even India have Mohammad Shami now and he is bowling quicker than our guys. Chris Woakes has become our fastest bowler. How has that happened? Yes we have problems with the coaching of the team because the players are not getting any better but the system is not producing the talent we need. I do not judge England's seam bowlers not against Mitchell Starc or Trent Boult. We have not got their pace. But I judge them against someone like Tim Southee. He is an English-style seam bowler and he is moving the ball. Why are we not moving the ball? It must be length. It can't be the batch of balls. Where are the spinners? Why have we not got a left armer or any variation in this World Cup when we have had four years to plan. We have no alternative to right-arm 84mph seam bowlers and an off spinner. It is an attack that resembles a bowling machine.

There will be different perspectives on the McCullum path but one thing is certain - his image has undergone a u-turn. Saturday's World Cup victory over Australia was almost too perfect for words - a rare case in sport of the outcome beating the hell out of the build-up. A tournament crying out for a nail-biting finish between heavyweights got it. McCullum provided the subplot of quiet courage, taking a savage blow during another terrific innings.